It is time. After some long deliberation and brain melting I have completed my fan cast for Preacher.
This is one of those titles that fans are absolutely viscous about and they should be. The characters are so fun and intricate that not just anyone could pull off the greatness that Garth Ennis provided for us all. This isn’t a normal fan cast. It will be incredibly detailed ranging from Director and cast to soundtrack to how to make it happen. I have slaved over this one and hope that it will make a live action Preacher incarnation closer to reality (if only in our dreams). So now that all the pleasantries are out of the way… enjoy!
HOW IS IT POSSIBLE?
That’s the big question. With 75 issues of great material (very little of which is expendable)… how can we possibly make this a reality?! No film, not even a trilogy could hold all of this information and still be true to the feel of the original. So, like most of you, my vote is for a HBO (ish) series. Sixty six episodes worth… these episodes will cover the monthly issues from the series. I would also like to see the 5 one shot specials as well as the 4 “Saint of Killers” limited series produced (as a “Special” part of the show) in animated Made for HBO films, similar to what they did with with the Black Pearl portion of Watchmen.
WHO COULD DIRECT THIS EPIC?!
Directors are sooo important to a project. The Director can make or break a project. So the question is; “Do we play it safe or do we take a chance at greatness?” I’m going for greatness. Certain words come to mind when I think of Preacher. Words like; Manly, Action, Testosterone, and last but not least… Funny as Crap! When I think of films that have accomplished these goals, there are some “safe” choices that would be easy to go with. I however think that this project needs someone risky. I think the director of Preacher needs to be someone with balls! I think we need Troy Duffy as Preacher’s Director! His experience level may be low but the two films that he has done became immediate Cult Classics. I of course am referring to Boondock Saints 1 + 2. Which, by the way also make me think of words like; Manly, Action, Testosterone, and last but not least… Funny as Crap! He’s a man’s man. He knows what guys want to see in a film, and DELIVERS! He also doesn’t shy away from edgy religious material or anything else for that matter. Can he pull of a film based on Ennis’ crown jewel? Can he pull off a film full of special effects and heavy makeup work? I don’t know but I’d be interested to see and I think it’s worth the risk!
NOW, ON TO THE GOOD STUFF!
THE MAIN THREE
JESSE CUSTER: Nothing about this casting was easy. However, I think the most intimidating task was to cast The Preacher himself; Jesse Custer. Jesse has a very pronounced cheek line in the comics. This usually wouldn’t be such a deal breaker except that the jaw line is what gives him his rugged appearance… his “Tall, Dark, and Handsomeness” if you will. He also has to be believable when he walks up to some jerk in a bar and punches him in the mouth. He also has to be able to pull off a country accent without it sounding forced. I mean, when your “super power” is speaking… your accent is a must to fulfill the character’s wholeness. So after much deliberation and countless Google searches I’ve decided on Guy Pearce.
He has the perfect Jesse Custer face, he looks like he could beat the crap out of you (especially in his nifty priest collar) but can he pull off the voice? Admittedly I had my doubts. I had only ever seen him play pompous people who were as far from country as I could think of. However amidst my search I found some clips from a film he did called: “A Slipping-Down Life” and he did it! It isn’t as strong as Jesse’s but it gives me hope that he could attain the southern drawl that Jesse needs.
TULIP O’HARE: Tulip has to be fun, beautiful, a little crazy and tough as nails! Pretty faces are a dime a dozen but finding one that’s attached to the rest of those qualifications is hard to come by. Why do you think Jesse’s so in love with her?! She (like Jesse) needs a strong country twang. Ladies and gentlemen, your Tulip O’Hare is: Julie Benz.
If you have any doubts to this little lady’s qualifications go BUY a copy of “Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day”. She’s everything we need in an on screen Tulip. And due to the previously stated project she already has a good working relationship with our director.
PROINSIAS CASSIDY: Cassidy is the guy that you love to drink with but if he’s sober you really don’t want to be around him. He’s crass, dirty, a back stabber, and thirsty… For Blood! So for this casting I’ve chosen (another “Boondock” star) Sean Patrick Flannery.
He has the look. He has the attitude. He can play your best friend one minute and turn and scream guns drawn… sounds like Cassidy to me.
THE SUPERNATURAL
GENESIS: The fiery screaming spawn child of an unholy union between Angel and Demon. My pick is The Gerber Baby! Just kidding, of course this one is all CG.
Though the Gerber Baby might be a good template.
THE LORD: The Lord in the film is a big glowing pansy. He’s awkward and shady. He’s… He’s… the main villain and source of Jesse’s mission. He is Billy Connoly.
Ok, this is the very last Boondock Saint Cast member, I promise. But really who better to play The Lord other than a great comedian that looks just like the drawings that Steve Dillon gave us! He’s funny and acts like a little kid half the time… that is until he plays someone like Il Duce and shows that he can also portray Dillon’s angered red deity also!
THE SAINT OF KILLERS: There needs to be no build up here. Who else could do it? Of course it’s Sam Elliot.
Some of you may cry out that this is the stereotypical cowboy. To which I would say: There’s a reason for that!
THE DUKE: Jesse’s imaginary friend. John Wayne himself. This character needs to be shadowy and mysterious… always remaining hidden behind a cowboy hat and gruff speech. Like him or not, I can think of no one better than Curt Russell to play The Duke.
He’s tough, rough around the edges, and he played Wyatt Earp for crying out loud!
THE ARSE FAMILY
HUGO ROOT: Mean, abrasive, abusive and as serious as can be. I went totally on looks for this one. Sheriff Hugo Root (the father of Arse Face) is Michael Parks.
Old… grumpy… Hugo.
ARSE FACE: Now, by now we have ALL seen the killer makeup that has been done to create the ugly mug of Arse Face. So after seeing what they could do I strictly went with an actor that could play Arse Face in his pre mangled face days. I picked a kid that could pull off a depressed abused kid. I give you Josh Peck.
I think that once the makeup goes on he will have no problem being our drooling, slurring, rockstar.
ON THE FARM
MARIE L'ANGELLE (GRANDMA): Super skinny, Super Scary, mean as crap and viscous. Well that about sums it up. This is one of those parts that’s going to take a great makeup artist to pull off. However, in the spirit of giving them something good to work with; Sally Field.
She is a phenomenal actress. She also is looking incredibly skinny and fragile these days.
JODY: The rough and tough rascal that killed Jesse’s Daddy and taught him everything he knows about fighting and working on cars. I had to push the travesty of Jonah Hex out of my head and look at the actor himself so that I could cast Josh Brolin.
I just see him being a terrific representation of the rough and tumble Jody. He will also make a great contrast to Jody awkward sidekick…
T.C.: The country Bumpkin that will put his ^%#*@ in anything. And after you see him and his child molester smile its obvious why his standards are so low. When you see the casting, you will feel the same way. There’s just a little something wrong with Clint Howard.
Creepy I know… But that’s the point isn’t it?
BILLY BOB: Jesse’s little one eyed friend.
Small part, not much needed… just a kid and some good makeup.
A LITTLE TOWN CALLED SALVATION
CHRISTINA CUSTER: Jesse Custer’s mom. She needs to be pretty in the flash backs to the farm and yet very weathered later when he reunites we her in the town of Salvation. However, even in her beaten down state she needs to have an illusiveness of beauty. Who better to knock this one out of the park but “Monster” actress Charlize Theron.
She has played the country girl getting abused before (North Country). She has played a supernatural thriller (Devil’s Advocate). She is Christina Custer.
LORRIE BOBBS: The one eyed knock out of the town of Salvation. The girl that will one day see the man of her dreams in the face of an arse. “Jericho” star Clare Carey is our Lorrie.
Give her some great makeup and a ditzy (yet intelligent) attitude and Salvation is one step closer to completion.
ODIN QUINCANNON: That crazy short meat lover… no, reall; Short… and I meat LOVER. Give me a short bald man that can act a little crazy and I’ll give you Ben Kingsley.
He looks the part and part of me gets a giggle inside thinking about Jesse throwing Ben Kingsley out on his head.
MISS OATLASH: Mr. Quincannon’s Nazi lawyer. (Starting realize the richness of these characters yet?) She needs to be beautiful but needs a dark side. Terri Hatcher fills that role in my book.
She also seems like an actress that could manage to hold straight face while arguing that Hitler was not a racist.
THE GRAIL
ALL FATHER D’ARONIQUE: Fat… nasty… fat… grotesque… fat and did I mention fat?! Let’s face it, no one is fat enough to make this role real. It will take a body suit and serious prosthetics. Now, I don’t want you to think I picked Kevin Durand simply based on his role as The Blob (I will admit it didn’t hurt). I really based it off of his ability to be so diverse in his acting career.
It is good to know that he can look believable in the fat suit though. We’ve all seen films where it obviously looked fake. Duran pulled it off once… let’s hope he can again.
THE MESSIAH: I’m just going to come out and say it: Robert Pattinson.
Now before I get tarred and feathered for putting “the Twighlight guy” in our film… let me explain.
I believe that there are roles that people are born to play. Really who could play an inbred, feces throwing, “didley dooing” idiot if not Robert Pattinson. P.S. He looks the part too!
HERR STARR: One of the greatest villains ever created. A glutton for punishment. Bound by a set of his own rules. He reminds me of (what is in my opinion) the greatest villain ever put on film; “Gangs of New York” baddie: The Butcher. So, shave him down and cut his eye because Daniel Day Lewis will soon be rising to the top of the Grail.
The idea of seeing Lewis as Starr gives me goose bumps.
HOOVER: The poor Grail agent that Jesse leaves counting grains of sand on a beach. Educated, loving… just a good guy (well despite being a part of the grail)! Another star from “Jericho”, Lennie James looks the part but also gives off a very astute feeling that fits Hoover perfectly.
I can’t wait to see Hoover half crazy and malnourished from counting the sand stumble into Starr’s office.
FEATHERSTONE: The secret admirer of Herr Starr. Sassy and strong. Smart and coarse. I just see Smallvile’s Allison Mack doing a great job at this part.
And with that we have a well rounded Grail and a force to be reckoned with.
THE SEX TRADE
JESUS DESADE: The pale, regal weirdo. Whether accessing his inner albino in “Hellboy II” or his regal splendor in “Night with the King” I think Luke Goss is a great choice for our resident deviant.
Which brings us to our two favorite investigators.
BUGGERY BOB + Fellatio Freddie: Well, what can you say about these two except… well, John Goodman and Michael Jeter.
SOUNDTRACK
I took the liberty of assigning certain “theme songs” (if you will) to the main characters of the Preacher Saga. This is obviously just a start and would need to be expanded.
Jesse – “When The Man Comes Around” – Johnny Cash
Obviously Jesse needs a good old Gunslinger tune. So for Jesse, the Man In Black is of course the best choice. The Lyrics can also be used to describe Jesse rather than its real focus (Jesus) allowing it to fit well into the awesome piece of fiction.
Tulip – “Can’t Cry anymore” – Sheryl Crow
It’s gotta be a chick! The lyrics talk about a woman on the run after her lover leaves her. It also deals with “escape” which is a constant theme of Tulip’s character both in her previous life of rambling with Jesse and in the future as she’s wanting Jesse’s mission to be over and return to their live by the seat of their pants lifestyle.
Cassidy – “Better Days” – The Dirges
Come on! Irish Punk!? Irish Punk that’s chorus is as follows: “So let's raise a glass to better days
Forget the past and our wicked ways. Just let me sing this one last song... and make this feelin' last....all night long!” …nuff said. Cassidy all the way!
WRAP UP
Well, there you have it. I struggled with this one big time! But I hope you guys enjoy it! Let me know what you think… but be nice! This was a lot of work.