It’s back! The iconic “10 Must Haves” series has returned, and it is bigger and better than ever. Retiring the series more than 12 months ago, I, Dave “Gold” Khanlark, have returned. This series has been universally successful, resulting in the brilliant casting, and the universal praise, of Ezra Miller as The Flash as well as the secret casting of Nicolas Cage as Batman’s Father in Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice.
So, without further ado, what is today’s topic? Well, none other than Marvel’s potential Spider-Man reboot. For what feels like years, articles on this site as well as hundreds of others, have reported on the now infamous, “Sony Hack” or “The Hackening” as many have called it. Despite being a terrible event for Sony Pictures, because of this, the company may in fact sell the rights to their most profitable series to Marvel Studios, or allow Marvel to use the character in their shared universe.
In this article, I will list the “10 Must Haves” for the (potential) Spider-Man reboot from Marvel Studios, so grab a cup of tea, or a Pepsi, your choice, warm your seat, and enjoy the article!
Everyone, and I mean everyone, knows how Peter Parker became Spider-Man. That being said, people may not know it or have it imprinted in our memory like us nerds, but they know the general concept. They know his Uncle dies, they know “Great power comes great responsibility” blah, blah, blah, we get it. The one mistake Marvel could make is simply doing the origin story again, while we have heard they have no plans for the origin story, it is still something I fear they will either address or reference in the next film. While Sam Raimi’s Spider-Man showed the world the origin, Marc Webb’s The Amazing Spider-Man imprinted it in our memory, forever.
2. New Villains
I recently posted an article on here discussing how I would tackle the Spider-Man reboot, and to my surprise, the comments and feedback were generally all the same. A recurring comment was the idea of “New villains” this has stuck with me ever since, and over the Christmas break, I have thought about it even more. People want to see new villains, new characters and problems for the ol’ Web-head to tackle. I’m not talking about new versions of previously seen characters like The Green Goblin or Doctor Octopus, I’m talking about new villains, like Morbius or Hydro-Man, two villains who, thanks to the 90s cartoon, I now adore.
3. However, Don’t Forget The Oldies
Following my previous statement, I do not want/expect Marvel to completely forget about the iconic villains. Every Spider-Man franchise will have some form of Goblin, whether it is the Green Goblin or the Hobgoblin, the character is Spider-Man’s Joker, just imagine a Batman film-series without the Joker, how weird would that be. The same thing could be said for Dr. Connors/The Lizard, who was played by Rhys Ifans in Webb’s The Amazing Spider-Man. I believe Marvel Studios should reboot that character along with the title character, as The Lizard was barely touched on in The Amazing Spider-Man, completely ignoring the family dynamic, an essential to the character.
4. Have Some Goddamn Fun
I don’t know about you, but something I had always thought these Amazing Spider-Man films were missing (among other things) was fun. Which is quite funny, considering the Spider-Man in these films is a lot more fun to watch than Sam Raimi’s. But, the one thing that the old trilogy has over these films, is the fun-factor. I have a ton of fun watching the old Spider-Mans, nothing’s taken too seriously, and at the end of the day, the hero stands tall over-coming every single problem that he has dealt with. Webb’s films, at least I feel, were never meant to be serious mixed with fun, I think originally, before Sony “fixed” the first film, the tone was meant to be extremely similar to the first teaser trailer. While that could have worked, they tried it, and it did not work, so now, Marvel, have some goddamn fun.
5. F*ck High School, Man
According to a leaked email, Marvel Studios wants their Spider-Man to be feature Peter Parker as a high schooler, juggling his life as a teenager, and his life as Spider-Man. Now, if you told me this 10-years ago, before we saw a reboot of Spider-Man, set in high school, you would receive a passionate “Yes!” However, because I, and every-user on this site, experienced The Amazing Spider-Man, while not a bad film at all, it did show Peter Parker during his high school times. High school-Peter Parker is the worst Peter Parker, and if you disagree, then you are essentially forgetting that all of the best storylines in the comic books, occurred after Peter left high school with The Night Gwen Stacy Died, Kraven’s Last Hunt and Spider-Man: No More being among them. In all honesty, I think this film needs to be set in college. College-Peter Parker is my favourite Peter Parker, as this was the iteration I grew up with, thanks to the 90s show.
6. A Kick Ass Soundtrack
What the f*ck was “It’s On Again”?
What the hell happened to the awesome soundtracks from the past, Raimi’s first film had Chad Kroger singing “Hero” and his second film has Dashboard Confessional playing “Vindicated” two songs that perfectly represented the character. While I may be a little too passionate about the various artists that are used in Spider-Man films, I want to focus on the score. We have had the same style of music with Spider-Man since 2002. It’s always this orchestrated, ballad, of heroic-ness, when really, I want something different. Let’s look at Her for a second, the film directed by Spike Jonze, featured a score written by Arcade Fire, it wasn’t a ballad, or an orchestra, it was something more real, using guitars and vocals instead of trumpets and pianos. I think the new Spider-Man film needs a “realer” soundtrack, for instance, I think M83, who wrote the score for Oblivion starring Tom Cruise, would be a perfect fit for Spider-Man with their youthful sound and fun. Their song “Midnight City” was featured in 22 Jump Street last year, and showcases an amazing sense of fun and excitement, if Marvel Studios could somehow find a way to reinvent the superhero score with this film, it would be something quite interesting.
One thing that the Spider-Man franchise has not had in recent memory, is the freedom to create. Spider-Man 3 was bogged down because the studio wanted Venom in it, and The Amazing Spider-Man 2 was turned into a cluster-f*ck, because the studio wanted to set up sequels and spin-offs as oppose to being focussed on the task at hand. But what I think Marvel Studios will give the people making this film is creative control. I have no doubt that the original screenplay for The Amazing Spider-Man 2 was brilliant, no doubt in my mind, but that film goes to show how a studio can turn something so great into something so poor. Kevin Feige is not known for being very into a film, like Avi Arad or Matt Tolmach, he, of course, has certain things to say about the films he produces, but he never forces a director or writer to shove an entire sub-plot into the film, and we know this because Marvel’s worst film is Thor: The Dark World. When your worst film, as a studio, is Thor: The Dark World, you know you’re going alright.
8. A Killer Screenplay
Returning to the more creative aspect of the film, this instalment needs something fresh, a screenplay that feels raw and new, while also respecting everything that has come before it. Last year, I saw the film The Fault In Our Stars, a great film indeed, but what the film had that made it so very good, was a brilliant screenplay from two of the most underrated writers in Hollywood. Scott Neustadter and Michael H. Weber, being the two I am talking about. To my surprise, the duo behind that film’s script, also wrote my favourite romantic-comedy ever, (500) Days Of Summer, and one of the most underrated films ever, The Spectacular Now. All three films share themes with Spider-Man; coming of age, love, sorrow, pain, fun. I think it would be a brilliant move on Marvel’s behalf if they signed Neustadter and Weber for this film, along with some of these potential directors.
9. Hire The Perfect Director Or Directors (Take The Hint)
Sometimes I feel bad for Marc Webb, but then I remember he was paid $6 million for The Amazing Spider-Man 2 and then I remember that I wasn’t paid for making a piece of shit, so, then I get a little upset. Spider-Man is the best superhero, period. He has the best villains, the best characters, the best suit, and the best themes. For a long time I have been pushing Ben Stiller to direct the next Spider-Man film, but now, after seeing a lot more indie-films, I have some better suggestions. For instance, I feel James Ponsoldt, who directed Smashed and The Spectacular Now, would be a perfect director for the wall-crawler, as he would nail the more human elements of the character. But then, I heard of Phil Lord and Chris Miller, and their apparent interest in the character. These two being the duo behind the Jump Street films and The Lego Movie. While they have only really done straight-up comedies, and Spider-Man is not a comedy, they currently have nothing in production as directors, as writers and producers, they have a lot, but as directors, nothing.
10. No Logan Lerman
I like Logan Lerman, I really do. Fury was one of my favourite movies of last year, but this kid, is not Spider-Man. Like the casting of Benedict Cumberbatch as Doctor Strange, if Marvel Studios cast Logan Lerman it would smell of easiness, a completely safe move, to be exact. Instead, I think Marvel should be looking at some lesser-known individuals. For instance, what about Jeremy Irvine, known for his roles in Spielberg’s War Horse, and at the tender age of 23, he is perfect for the college Peter Parker. Or better yet, what about Louis Zamperini himself, Jack O’Connell, known for his breakout role in Angelina Jolie’s Unbroken. I recently saw O’Connell in ’71, and it is very obvious to see how much talent this kid has. Interestingly, O’Connell was up for the role of Reed Richards, in the upcoming Fantastic Four reboot over at Fox. I think O’Connell has a roughness that we have yet to see with Spider-Man, and he seems like a perfect fit, like Irvine, for a college-bound Peter Parker.
Alas, that brings us to the end of this article and the return of “10 Must Haves.” I want to thank everyone who has read this article, as it is quite difficult to come back to something so massive like this. Now, of course, these are just my opinions, so be sure to let me know what you thought of them in the usual place, down below. Also, if you liked what you see here, hit that big red thumb!