Rockerdude's Rap Battles: Mario vs. Wario

Rockerdude's Rap Battles: Mario vs. Wario

Two of Nintendo's most popular characters (and rivals) go up against each other in a clash of raps. Who wins? You decide!

By rockerdude22 - Apr 28, 2013 08:04 PM EST
Filed Under: Fan Fic

I know this one isn't really comic book related, but I thought I should upload this anyway since I think it's my best one yet. Hope you enjoy!



Mario:
It’s a me, Mario! And I’m about to overthrow
An ugly hack douche who’s name is Wario
Quit ripping so much gas you stupid poser
Then again, that’s not so bad, cause your face is so much grosser
Look at you, thinking you’re so hot dressed in yellow
Mona told me last night, that she wishes she met another fellow
I’m giving you a beatdown while rocking these overalls
It’s the end for you Wario, so suck my fireballs!



Wario:
Hold the phones, is this red-clad prick talking to me?
I didn’t know this was Super B***h Bros. for the Nintendo Wii
Don’t think you got this battle in a bag, you brainless stooge
Cause you’re popularity’s shrinking, while mine’s getting huge
Oh, so you say you showed Mona a good time?
Well last night, Princess Peach was looking awfully fine.
Come at me if you even dare, Super Dorkio
Cause after this, I’ll be crowned the new face of Nintendo



Mario:
You more popular than me? Ha! That’s quite a laugh
You’re just pouty because I’ve got a better mustache
When one thinks of video games, they think of me
Go prepare your funeral, cause my hammer is the last thing you’ll see



Wario:
You should get a power-up that’ll write you better rhymes
Stop eating so much pasta, cause it’s going straight to your thighs
I’ll blow you a fart that’ll crack all of your bones
You’re game career is over, let me point you to the retirement home

[Luigi enters the battle]



Luigi:
The Big, Bad, and Green has now entered the arena
Listen to you two rap, ugh, mama mia!
Mario, listen bro, you have simply just got to go
Yoshi’s box needs cleaning, so now I’m going to run this show
And you there, standing in the yellow, looking like someone filled you with jello
You’ll never be respected, cause your games don’t have the phrase Super Mario
Get out of here both of you, cause it’s all about Luigi
You refuse my advice? Well then, just come right at me.

[Mario and Wario stare at Luigi looking annoyed. Mario charges a fireball and Wario pulls out a beam sword.]

Luigi:
Ah, shi…

Who won? You decide!
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scootaloo
scootaloo - 4/28/2013, 9:00 PM
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