99 Reasons Why The Dark Knight Rises SUCKED

99 Reasons Why The Dark Knight Rises SUCKED

After the fantastic movies that were Batman Begins and The Dark Knight, my expectations for The Dark Knight Rises were pretty astronomical. Unfortunately, I was severely let down. Here I will list 99 reasons why The Dark Knight Rises was a bad film. Obviously, SPOILERS are to be expected so be warned if you haven't seen the film yet.

Editorial Opinion
By SuperBro - Aug 01, 2012 09:08 PM EST
Filed Under: Batman

1.Pacing of the story was horrible. It felt like watching a 3-hour long trailer where dialogue is delivered at a snap pace and given no time to sink in.

2. Despite this fast pace to get all this story crammed in there are at least a good 5-10 minutes of time wasted showing Batman on top of a building overlooking the city.

3. Even the Batman/Selina kiss at the end felt "loveless" and thrown in "just because"

4. I believe studio script writers who had to review the film were too scared to tell Christopher Nolan he has to "show" rather than "tell". The film contained far too much junk that just simply tells us what is going on rather than let us actually experience. We are told the villains motivations are to build up hope of the people then bring it crashing down yet we never see this occur. We are told how fast, brutal, and ferocious Bane is yet the fight scene choreography was rather slow and dull. One last example comes in the clues that Bruce is still alive then we see Bruce in the cafe, the shot of him in the cafe went far too long and should have only had Alfred get a passing glimpse of Bruce and the result would have been more ambiguous and more Christopher Nolan.

5. Both villain deaths were pathetic and anti-climactic. Bane was blown to smithereens by Catwoman and Miranda/Talia is killed in a car crash. Batman doesn't actually/directly defeat either villain in the film. Hell, technically Batman just sets the jet to auto-pilot and The Bat vehicle takes care of the bomb. Maybe Bruce should have retired earlier and let Robin do all the work because he was a bum throughout most of the film. By far the most un-heroic hero of all superhero movies of late.

6. The explanation for the villains motivations is to build up the hope of the people and then crush it. They take over the city and make the place hell for months. By this time people would have lost all hope with the way things were in the city. This bomb should have been detonated within a week of activation. At around this time people would begin to lose any hope.

7. The count-down for the bomb was 5 months. The exact time Batman needed to recover and get back to Gotham. This plot is from a "visionary" director.

8. A device that can completely erase someone's identity is a ridiculous concept like unobtanium from Avatar. No way the device works considering the size of the file that Blake shows to Selina at the airport. Can't erase a paper file too.

9. The dialog in the script is overly dramatic and filled with far too much exposition. Nobody talks like that in real life and for a movie grounded in realism the amount of exposition took me out of the narrative in several scenes.

10. For a movie grounded in realism (remember all the bruises from the first film) we see Batman shrug off an awful lot of punishment in this film. First the no cartilage in the knee, the ass beating/broken back from Bane, a stab to the gut from Talia. Batman shrugs all of this off and doesn't lose a single step. As a matter of fact, the more punishment he receives it appears the stronger he gets through the film.

11. Too much repetition in the script. Did we really need to hear JGL called a hot-head so many times? Did we really need to see the wheels on the Bat Pod flip 15 times? Did we really need to be constantly reminded that Bane was a member of the League of Shadows about 80 times by every character in the film practically?

12. The movie should have been titled Bruce Wayne Rises because Batman only has a very few scenes in the actual movie. As a matter of fact, a few of the minor characters probably share just as much screen time as the caped crusader.

13. Several scenes involving the dark knight and the thick black makeup he wears around his eyes are noticeable. Particularly one scene where he is in the bat suit with the helmet off and no makeup is present or when he is captured by Bane who besides stripping him of his equipment felt the need to wash his face for him as well. We see this makeup present in almost every close-up face shot of Batman.

14. The change in shooting location from Chicago to Pittsburgh/New York made a very large difference in the feel of Gotham. In Batman Begins and TDK Gotham felt very dark and crime ridden as well as smaller. The scene change to New York/Pitt made it almost seem that Gotham was an entirely different city from the previous two films.

15. The reveal of Bane/Talia underscores Bane's entire character reducing him almost to henchman status and Talia gives us absolutely nothing to fear or show us that she is an evil bad guy since she dies five minutes later.

16. Despite the prison being constantly told how much of a hell hole it was when Batman was trapped in it the prison seemed fairly relaxed. You didn't see anyone trying to make a crippled Bruce Wayne their bitch, they had a prisoner with some medical training helping to take care of Bruce, they even had TV in the prison. Christopher Nolan should have consulted with the makers of Prison Break if he wanted to make a prison a hell hole because they did a better job of that in the season 3 Panama Prison.

17. The CIA allows three unidentified and hooded people who were captured onto their plane that is transporting a scientist at the beginning of the film because they supposedly have knowledge of the masked man named Bane and his group. They allow this without checking who these hooded people are. It was no surprise to anyone to find out one of these people was, in fact, Bane himself.

18. A CIA plane transporting an important scientist they have captured seemingly has no radar support to realize another plan is hovering directly above them.

19. Without doing any hard math on it. There is no way that the plane hijacking in the beginning was even remotely possible/believable. Everything from the plane that continues to fly needed some tremendous power/stability to stay in the air despite pulling another plane to the strength of the cables and joints holding the cables in being strong enough to the way the plane drags through the air (perpendicular to the ground) all defied logic and physics.

20. Bane seems to have A LOT of suicidal followers throughout the film. It can be explained away as them being League of Shadows members. The only problem with this is The League of Shadows took a huge hit to their ranks in the first film. Even assuming that after Raz's death Talia took over and rebuilt their army was far too large and filled with far too many suicidal members.

21. One of Banes suicidal followers is given a blood transfusion from a doctor on a plane Bane is trying to kidnap to fake this guys death. This wouldn't fool any forensics team into ID-ing the dead body from a plane crash.

22. Gordon gets captured and taken to Bane and he escaped by jumping into flowing water in the sewer. The prisoner exclaims there is no way to know which water way he will wash up through and end up at. However, Officer Blake who has no idea he even jumped into the water seemingly acts on a hunch and knows exactly where to find Gordon.

23. After Gordon is at the hospital he is adamant about searching the sewers to hunt down Bane exclaiming there is an army in the sewers. The problem with this is he was mostly unconscious until he reached Bane in the sewers. All he saw was a couple guys and a masked man, hardly Bane and an Army in the sewers.

24. Also, how does someone like Commissioner Gordon even know who Bane is? He seems as he is portrayed as a terrorist probably in the Africa/Asia/Middle East areas. Not someone who a half-unconscious police commissioner would know.

25. While researching Cat woman Christian Bale comes across a news paper article that incorrectly spells the word heist as "hiest" this is a spelling mistake that a visionary writer/director shouldn't have trouble with.

26. Due to issues with his body, Wayne gets "robo-legs" that look like a simple knee brace and then proceeds to smash a brick out of a wall with a kick. His foot however remains unharmed.

27. Wayne and Alfred have a scene together where he doesn't want him to go after Bane because of his skill and ability. He mentions Bane and The League of Shadows. How does he or Batman know that Bane is a member of The League of Shadows at this point? It didn't even seem like the CIA knew about The League of Shadows or that Bane was a member at the beginning of the film.

28. During this scene he also tells us Bane was born in a pit prison and was the only one who ever escaped. We later know that this is false information. This dialogue was redundant to the story because we have these facts drilled to use multiple times throughout the film. It still doesn't change the fact, where does Alfred get his information from and how does he seem to know so much about this? This point and the previous point completely undercut the reveal during the fight scene with Bane in the sewer. So much for "visionary" director. He completely negates the drama of the reveal thanks to excess useless exposition. Did he just graduate from film school?

29. They need a few minutes to hack the stock exchange in the Wall Street scene. They decide to take hostages, get on some dirt bikes and go on a chase through the city. Somehow Bane managed to smuggle several dirt bikes into the lobby of this Wall Street place all by himself. The other terrorists it is shown had already been present inside the building, where did they stash the dirt bikes and how did they get them? Magic!

30. Speaking of the Stock Exchange scene. The stock exchange closes at what, 4pm, 5pm? They apparently need only a few minutes to hack into the stock exchange. When they enter it is day time and a lot of trading is going on. When they decide they need to get out of there because the fiber and satellite is being cut (still day time as the officer is giving the order) they get on their magical dirt bikes it is suddenly pitch black way past sundown at night, perfect for Batman to navigate all the shadows and hide the bat plane in the alley! Keep in mind, this is supposed to be a summer/early fall scene. The sun wouldn't set until eight o'clock at least.

31. After the Wall Street scene all of the cops begin chasing Batman and letting the terrorists go. This wouldn't be the case and makes the police "dumb" just so Bane can escape. They showed close to a hundred cop cars filling the streets coming from both sides to trap him in. It is ridiculous to believe that they couldn't spare 2-3 to track down the other terrorists.

32. After Bruce/Miranda sleep together he runs his hand over the league of shadows mark on her. He seemingly forgets the fact that it appeared he noticed it until she betrays him at the very end of the film.

33. How does Miranda and Bane know that Bruce and Batman are the same person? I guess you could say that Raz decided to randomly tell his daughter about Bruce/Batman but what point would that have served? In Batman Begins we can assume that Talia disowned her father before he trains Batman and doesn't have much contact with her. That's why he tells Bruce that his wife and daughter were taken from him. So then Bruce is in Gotham trying to save it when Raz drops in to crash his party. At what point did he feel the need to tell his daughter about Bruce/Batman? Did he expect to fail, something that would have been wildly out of place for his character?

34. During the fight scene with Bane he uses some crappy firework crap on Bane and then turns out the lights. Later in the movie he uses a mini batarang laced with some sort of knockout agent. Why didn't he use something on his belt a little more powerful during the fight scene with Bane like that? If he has more powerful objects on his utility bet why not try and use them?

35. Also during this fight scene, Bane gives lines that is misdirection to lead the audience to think Bane is the child born in the pit despite the fact that he isn't He has no reason to lie to Batman at this point regardless he says to Batman after Batman makes the lights go out, "I didn't see the sunlight until I was a man." We know this isn't true because he wasn't born in the pit prison. Talia was born in the pit prison. It almost makes it feel like they got halfway through filming before deciding that Marion Cotillard was going to be a bad guy in a sudden twist ending.

36. Where did Bane/Talia get the knowledge regarding the secret R&D facility that Lucius ran? We see a scene of Lucius taking Talia to the reactor at one point in the film so it is plausible that they knew where to find the reactor but the knowledge of the secret applied sciences division and all the weaponry it contains is something that seems like Talia and Bane "magically" knew.

37. Gotham sending in 90%+ of the police force down into the sewers leaving the city unprotected.

38. Commissioner Gordon near death in a hospital bed can barely get out of bed manages to ambush not one but two members of the League of Shadows, killing them both, with little effort. From this point on in the film he suffers no effects from his injuries.

39. Gotham is a major city, some other major cities... Chicago, Pittsburgh, New York, San Francisco, Seattle, Dallas. All these teams regularly sell out their seats. The only possible explanation is the football game was a pre-season game but I doubt Hines Ward would be charged with a kick-off return in a pre-season game.

40. The doctor weaponizing the reactor was only a theory he had suggest. He had never actually worked with reactor itself. Despite this it took him less than 30-seconds to weaponize the reactor.

41. The doctor who turned the reactor into a bomb is implied to be the only person to stop it and really know how it's going to work. He tells Bane, in the presence of Lucius Fox and Miranda, that the bomb could decay over time and be non-operational. Despite this Fox and Miranda later in the film magically know that the bomb is going to decay and explode without studying the bomb which is kept on transports and constantly on the move.

42. The cops of Gotham are stuck underground in the sewers for months. The city engineers really need to rethink their city design after this and add more manholes to Gotham.

43. Bane suddenly gets a hold of the letter regarding Dent that Gordon had been holding onto to reveal the truth about what happened the last night before Batman disappeared. This wasn't something that was handed to Bane when Gordon's pockets were being searched and up to this point that had been the only time Bane and Gordon actually met. How did Bane get this letter?

44. Batman is stuck in a prison located at the bottom of a deep well in the middle east yet they seem to get better reception than some people in the United States.

45. Speaking of prison amenities. The only apparent way in or out is to be lowered by ropes. How are basic needs of something like prisoners handled in a prison such as this? It would seem like a hell of a lot of work for them to once a day constantly lowering down buckets of food and water then hauling up buckets of human waste. It would just be better to have an actual above ground prison at that point.

46. Also, this prison was unguarded. It had a lot of prisoners. In this entire time Bruce is down there not one other prisoner has someone on the outside who wants to rescue them and just throws a rope down the well for all prisoners to escape? This rope is sitting right on the edge of said prison too because after Bruce makes it out he throws it down for everyone else to climb out! The prison is about as dumb and idiotic as a prison in space.

47. Bruce Wayne could barely walk without his robo-legs in the beginning of the movie from cartilage wearing out. This isn't something that heals all by itself. After he is stripped of his gear and thrown into the prison he seemingly has no troubles walking after a couple months of recovery. We are shown his robo-legs were taken when he is doing the exercises in shorts later in the prison scenes.

48. A Karate Chop to the back will not fix a broken back/protruding vertebrae/bulging disc

49. Several attempts to leave the pit result in Bruce Wayne falling a significant distance with a rope tied around him so he doesn't fall to his death. When the rope reaches its maximum length on the way down and snaps him to a stop before the ground it would cause significant internal damage and/or broken ribs.

50. Speaking of which, even if the child who escapes the prison had the fear of death when making this jump, it took Bruce Wayne, someone who is incredibly fit and athletic, all his strength/ability to make a jump. This isn't something we should see a child around the age of 10-12 being able to do. Do you really think a child at that age can compete in a competition like the long jump in the Olympics? It was too farfetched that this child could make this jump regardless of the motivation.

51. Also, his final attempt to leap out of the prison a swarm of bats apparently fly out of a hole somewhere right behind the ledge Bruce Wayne is standing on. This whole doesn't exist in any of the shots they show of the pit and is an impossible event added simply for dramatics.

52. Batman escapes from a prison in the middle east. His estate had been totally wiped out in a previous point in the film and his car is even repossessed yet somehow he makes it from the middle east back to America without any ID or money within a few days despite most of his contacts stuck in Gotham under siege.

53. All bridges except one into the city were destroyed and it is the middle of winter yet somehow Bruce Wayne is able to slip back into Gotham seemingly undetected.

54. As seen earlier in the film, gas is scarce and some of it is siphoned by Blake for a bus in case they need to escape the city. Despite this, three trucks have been driving around the city for months, one of which carrying the bomb, and they don't need to worry about the supply of gas to a city that has had every entrance cut off except one.

55. Shortly after slipping back into the city Bruce knows exactly where to find Selina Kyle and is waiting for her on the street.

56. Batman's blind trust for a woman who stole his mothers pearls, stole his car, tricked him into a trap that resulted in his back broken, ending up in a prison in the middle east, and almost killed.

57. The police are given the knowledge that the bomb will decay and explode on its own eventually. They are given this information courtesy of Miranda/Talia and Lucius Fox. This is in direct opposition to Miranda/Talia's goals and results in the ultimate failure of those goals. The only possible way they could have gotten this information is directly from Miranda/Talia since she would have been the only one to have access to the bomb to study it but regardless, both she and Lucius shouldn't have had the knowledge to determine that this would happen.

58. After Gordon is exiled to death along with other police officers and Miranda is held aside Bruce Wayne returns to Gotham and enlists the help of Catwoman. Bruce allows himself to be captured and then Catwoman and Batman overpower the guards guarding Miranda and Lucius. Then Batman goes and gets some stuff from a secret facility him and Lucius have setup and he saves Gordon who THEN exclaims that Bane has Miranda. Why didn't Miranda also escape and go into hiding when her and Lucius should have been rescued?

59. Gordon and a few other people exiled to death to walk across the river but Batman wearing a 50 lb bat suit has no problem walking on the ice.

60. Despite the fact this bomb is a weaponized fusion bomb, it is tracked via radiation sensors. A fusion reactor wouldn't give off anything more than background levels of radiation.

61. Batman trying to save a city from a nuclear device and his friends from imminent death has time to scale a bridge and paint the symbol of a bat with some sort of flammable material to announce he is back in town for everyone to see.

62. Oh, and while he was so busy drawing that symbol he got John Blake's partner as well as a few other officers killed by Christopher Judge and almost got John executed himself.

63. Knowing Batman was back in town and Miranda/Talia wanted to see Batman fail and suffer, why didn't she set off the nuke the moment he lights up the big giant bat symbol on the bridge? The whole city would have seen the bat symbol and it would have been the greatest point in months of their hopeful release, it would have been the highest point for Batman's hope since he got out of the pit. This should have been the point that Talia/Bane set off the bomb the absolute highest point of everyone's hope was at this moment ready for them to crush.

64. Convicts armed with assault rifles decide to charge head first into groups of policeman with only pistols and billy clubs. A lot more cops should have been killed on the initial charge.

65. Oh yeah, and despite these cops being trapped down in the sewers for months, they were surprisingly clean shaven. Like Batman they must have had a lot of time between their escape and their next move and stopped at home to freshen up before the final battle.

66. Also about the cops, after spending several months in the sewer not seeing their families or really having the chance/nutrients to keep physically fit they are more than ready to go charging head first into the convicts who are armed better than they are.

67. Another thing about the cops. Bane and his crew were hunting down cops on the surface like dogs. We are given this information several times. If their goal is to hunt down and eradicate the cops and exile them to death to walk across the ice then why the hell or they feeding and giving the cops down in the sewers supplies for MONTHS!?!

68. What was the point of the second fight scene between Batman and Bane? To find the trigger? ?? Why not just have Batman be the one to put the transmitter on the transport with the nuke, then take care of the nuke? Why did he need to go fight Bane in hand-to-hand combat? Batman's actions are nonsensical at this point in the film. Lets fly the Bat Plane to destroy the Tumblers so the police can charge Braveheart style into the prisoners with machine guns while we park the Bat Plane and go fight Bane on the steps of city hall in hand-to-hand combat scene that doesn't matter because we need to get back to the Bat Plane and chase down the bomb anyways?

69. Also, why the hell did he only destroy the one tumbler with the Bat Plane before the Braveheart charge? Because it was the only one that was pointing a canon at the police? That was a dumb cop out considering that Talia then uses it to flee the scene and protect the bomb with one. Also, why the hell was only just one of the Tumblers threatening to blow up the police?

70. How did Selina get into the doorway of city hall with the Bat Pod just in time to shoot Bane? In the previous scene there were hundreds of people brawling just outside city hall. Did she just mow through the crowd with the bat pod?

71. The weaponized reactor came equipped with a time device that was greater than 99% accurate in determining the exact time it would take before the weapon would decay to the point that it would explode despite the fact the doctor who weaponized the reactor was unsure it would blow after that point anyways.

72. Speaking of which, how did seemingly every character know the precise time this bomb was going to detonate when nobody had even seen the bomb for months except when Gordon got into the back of the truck?

73. Also, the timer on the bomb constantly changes the time it reads. Some shots it reads 10 minutes, other shots it reads 17 minutes. All this coming from a visionary writer/director that boasts he has the entire movie blocked out in his head and knows the run time and budget long before actual filming starts.

74. Snow appearing then disappearing. We see several scenes where it is winter and the streets aren't being plowed etc because Gotham is in the middle of chaos. Despite this fact, both during the March to the steps of city hall as well as the final chase scenes the grounds are fairly devoid of snow accumulation that should be present if the plows aren't operating.

75. Gordon manages to survive riding in the back of the truck with the bomb after the truck crashes but Talia doesn't. Gordon would have been flung hard enough around in the back of that truck to have sustained serious injury.

76. Despite the bomb being labeled as "unstable", which is why it was going to explode, the bat plane senselessly knocks it around buildings and light poles as the bat plane flies out of the city.

77. Batman is alive at the end despite the fact the show him in the cockpit of the plane a few seconds before it explodes. We are treated to a scene showing the plane flying out of sight (during this scene it doesn't yet appear as anyone ejects) then a shot of John Blake, then the explosion. Batman should have been within range to be incinerated by the bomb which was given as a six mile radius earlier in the film.

80. Despite constant contact with Batman AND Bruce Wayne, Selina Kyle and Commissioner Gordon take until the VERY end of the film to figure out who Batman is despite Rookie Officer Blake figuring out the truth within the first fifteen minutes of the film after only having contact with him once or twice.

81. Bane requires a large, noticeable mask on his face or he suffers excruciating pain. Despite this he appears able to travel from country to country with relative ease. This is particularly noticeable after beating Wayne to a pulp in the sewer the very next scene takes place in the middle east when Bane is putting Bruce into the prison and Bruce is still semi-unconscious.

82. Another note about Bane's mask. When it starts to get knocked off by Batman towards the end Bane is essentially debilitated. Despite this debilitating pain Bane manages to stay incredibly fit looking like someone who needs to consume 5,000+ calories per day to keep his form with no apparent way for his body to get a sustainable amount of nutrients.

83. Final note on Bane's mask. It is supposed to deliver some sort of medicine to reduce/eliminate pain do to suffering from the pit prison and his beating there yet the mask requires no sort of canister to actually store the medicine.

84. Despite the lack of cartilage and other issues with Bruce Wayne's body he has no problem moving around and doing acrobatics. Even with the robo-legs we see him putting on he would still have considerable pain moving around and doing acrobatics since the pain is caused by movement and not weakness within the legs. Robo-legs would help if he were having some sort of muscle issue but not a cartilage issue.

85. Talia/Miranda character issue. Miranda, Lucius Fox, and one other member of Wayne Enterprises are taken to turn on the reactor so it can be weaponized. At this point the audience doesn't know Miranda is Talia and Miranda doesn't tip her hand for story purposes. As genius/calculating as Bane and Talia are they should have killed Lucius at this point. They know who Wayne/Batman is and it should be obvious to them that Lucius gives Batman a lot of support/help. Lucius is also one of two people (the other being Talia) who knows that the bomb will decay and blow by itself eventually anyways.

86. Talia/Miranda's death scene was overly dramatic. You've got a ticking nuclear device that is mere minutes from exploding and you want to listen to some dying twits reasoning behind her madness? Also, Marion Cotillard showed some severe problems with her acting skills in this scene. Future directors should make note she cannot act out a person who is dying from a severe car crash.

87. Talia/Bane character issue. Bane had been protecting Talia since she was a child trapped within the pit prison. Bane is at least 20-years old at this point (he looks closer to mid-20s when he is unmasked which is closer to Tom Hardy's actual age). Talia grows up, finds her father, joins the league of shadows, trains with the league of shadows, rescues Bane from the well, Bane gets exiled, and in The Dark Knight Rises she looks closer to the age of 30 being a member of the board of Wayne Enterprises. This would put Bane's age pushing 50 and that is being generous. Tom Hardy, a 35-year old actor playing someone 50 or older was a serious miss-cast since Bane/Miranda look like they are probably a similar age. Also it would be exceedingly difficult for a person to achieve the physical fitness of Bane at that age, especially since the movie didn't introduce his venom.

88. Miranda/Talia character flaw - What was the point of her sleeping with Bruce? In the comics there was a developed romance but in the movie she almost seems like she doesn't care for Bruce the first time the two meet then only a few scenes later she decides to bang him? The scene served absolutely no purpose and provided a plot hole with her LoS scar. This scene also comes merely moments in the movie (a day or so for Bruce) after Bruce and Alfred get into a yelling match about his love for Rachel Dawes. The only explanation I can think of is Christopher Nolan has an infatuation with Marion Cotillard and wanted to see her get naked on set.

89. Bane character issue - The entire film Bane is devoted to making people suffer, specifically he wants to make Batman/Wayne suffer as well. Yet at the very end of the film he wants to take the easy way out and blow off Batman's head with a shotgun. This leaves him wide open for Catwoman to come in and blow him away with a rocket from the batpod.

90. Who was Catwoman's female accomplice? She is thrown in during multiple scenes, not even given a name, then just disappears towards the end of the film. Multiple scenes give the impression of a lesbian relationship between Catwoman and this accomplice as well.

91. Detective ROBIN John Blake. Sort of a ridiculous way to include "Robin" into the trilogy. It would have been better to leave him as just John Blake, the successor who takes over the mantle of Batman.

92. Matthew Modine's character was the most paper thin, unnecessary character in the movie. Random Cop X who makes fun of John Blake for being a "hot-head" who then cowers in his house until he decides to lead the charge of police officers towards the end and then dies? If they had taken the 5-10 minutes they spent on his character for a good character like, I don't know, Batman, he might have been in the movie for more than 5 minutes.

93. Batman doesn't like guns or killing, we have this driven into our heads in TDK. Despite this he spends the last ten minutes of the film flying around shooting everything in sight including missile after missile to kill the driver and Talia in the nuke transport. Also, what was the point with the bow and arrow other than to scare Selina?

94. Batman, despite having no sort of programming/software knowledge manages to reprogram and patch the auto-pilot software in the bat plane by himself.

95. Bruce Wayne character issue - Bruce seems to be developing chemistry with Selina and seems somewhat infatuated with her. Despite this he bangs Miranda Tate just because.

96. Cat woman character issues - In the Christopher Nolan world of batman her character felt incredibly out of place in the series. In TDK a lot of people prior to the film felt The Joker was going to be far too non-serious of a character to properly fit into Nolan's world but he did it. While the cat woman scenes were enjoyable to me, they had some of the cheesiest, cringe-worthy dialog of any part of the movie. "My mother told me never to get into cars with strangers" "Don't steal from anyone you can't outrun" "Nobody ever called me dumb before". She is the Jar-Jar Binks of Christopher Nolan series. A hot Jar-Jar Binks but still a Jar-Jar Binks.

97. Character Issue with Selina Kyle and resources - We are treated with several scenes of Selina where she looks to be someone who isn't very rich but her burglaries allow her to live beyond her means for short periods of time. We also know she doesn't need any high tech safe cracking gear since she breaks into Bruce's safe seemingly without any tools. So where in the hell does she get the high tech goggles that are a part of her cat suit when she is riding the bat pod? It seems out of place and unnecessary for her character to have such a high tech piece of equipment.

98. Character Issue - Bane's Motivations - When he was in the pit Bane protected Talia because she was innocent and born into a world she didn't belong. When he goes to Gotham this same logic should apply. There are many children, orphans, and babies scattered throughout the city and he doesn't have a single care for any of them.

99. Character Issue - Bane - It surprises me that so many Spider-Man fans jumped all over Raimi for the liberties he took with the Spider-Man mythos and changing even simpler aspects such as Spider-Man shooting the webs form his body as opposed to a device he created. Yet Bane gets to completely change from being super human thanks to a chemical process to being just some buff dude who needs constant pain killers.


This wasn't just an awful Batman film, it was an awful film PERIOD.

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RidiculousFanBoyDemands
RidiculousFanBoyDemands - 8/1/2012, 10:23 PM
No offense my friend, but that is a lot of work to put in for a movie you didn't like. I hated Green Lantern and Iron Man 2, but I wasn't compelled to waste my time writing an editorial why.
k0sta1304
k0sta1304 - 8/1/2012, 10:33 PM
oh..my...god. I thought the title was just a figure of speech. You literly wrote 99 reasons why you didn't like a movie. Congratulations...on that alone sir.
LoudNoises
LoudNoises - 8/1/2012, 10:38 PM
Who is gonna sit here and read 99 problems you had with TDKR? Sum it up at least. I really hate to see someone put forth all this effort into an article that people are gonna take one look at and say "no way in hell am I going to read a list of 99 reasons you hate a movie" How about 10 reasons. 10 is reasonable.
LP4
LP4 - 8/1/2012, 10:42 PM
The movie was solid. The trilogy overall was very solid. You're just whining
SageMode
SageMode - 8/1/2012, 11:26 PM
This article is hilarious because it's true. I read every single one of them.

This made my night. Especially the last one 99.
MARV3L
MARV3L - 8/2/2012, 12:08 AM
I totally agree with every point in this article, I was thoroughly disappointed with this movie. Also the Nolanites have let themselves down claiming it to be a masterpiece, which is a blatant lie!

Who are they kidding? Do they really believe this and would they honestly suck Nolan's d#ck if it had herpes? In all seriousness I will never take a Nolanite's word again.

Not being one myself but still a massive fan of NolanI felt this was his worst film made to date. To class this in the same league as The Avengers is a desperate joke!
StormLoganSummers
StormLoganSummers - 8/2/2012, 12:21 AM
You actually listed 99 reasons?!

Knightrider
Knightrider - 8/2/2012, 2:08 AM
I have had a look through some points I am like hmm ok, but no film is perfect others I am like well that is explained in the movie, however this article is pure Nolan bashing.
I get it that may not like his films and not liked his take on Batman and yeah there are people on this site who being honest "Suck him off" but this is very sad as you come across petty.
I don't judge you for having an opinion but there are ways to go about it
People have enjoyed this film, is it perfect? No. However what film is? Avengers? No Amazing Spider-man? No Superman Returns? No
However seeing as you didn't write a list for these movies, which too have 99 problems, but the b!tch ain't one, so this seems to much of an personal attack done by someone who seems jealous of someone else's success.
MovieMaster
MovieMaster - 8/2/2012, 2:17 AM
You must be the coolest kid on the block.
MrReese
MrReese - 8/2/2012, 2:41 AM


haha movie kicked so much ass!!! XD
Kalel219
Kalel219 - 8/2/2012, 4:05 AM
HAHAHAAHAHAHA how [frick]ing sad can you get!!!
CPBuff22
CPBuff22 - 8/2/2012, 4:18 AM
I just read it and I cant believe how many of the same problems we have with this movie. I think my number is like 55. You thought of things I was willing to just let go because its a super hero flick.

But I must say bravo for catching all the cinematography flaws. I remember the post about Avengers being most flawed movie of the summer, well looks like TDKR beat Avengers at something after all.
calin88
calin88 - 8/2/2012, 4:28 AM
Dude you really need to get laid and stop thinking about this movie so much, it was awesome! I suggest you give us similar articles for X-men Wolverine, Green Lantern and Spiderman 3! :)))) you will be writing for days. the whole "grounded in reality" thing is relative, no 200+ million dollar movie will ever be grounded in reality, they're movies, shows, spectacles, threat them as such, cheers!
marvel72
marvel72 - 8/2/2012, 4:47 AM
i read the first 50,you do raise some valid points.

the dark knight rises 3/5 a good but flawed movie.
scmittydude
scmittydude - 8/2/2012, 4:52 AM
i wasn't a fan of this movie either. i thought it was quite boring.
rcapprotti
rcapprotti - 8/2/2012, 4:53 AM
99 reason you are a idiot
CPBuff22
CPBuff22 - 8/2/2012, 4:59 AM
Each and every point raised was valid. Don't let the Nolanites get you down.
breakUbatman
breakUbatman - 8/2/2012, 5:05 AM
I started reading then realised you actually put 99 reasons, so I only got up to number 5

From Number 4

One last example comes in the clues that Bruce is still alive then we see Bruce in the cafe, the shot of him in the cafe went far too long and should have only had Alfred get a passing glimpse of Bruce and the result would have been more ambiguous and more Christopher Nolan.

That bit wasn't meant to be ambiguous, it was confirmation that Bruce is alive. Though what you suggest would be more 'Nolan' it wouldnt fit with the conclusion of Bruce's journey. You wouldn't say a Tarantino movie was flawed because it didn't have a trunk shot would you?


5. Both villain deaths were pathetic and anti-climactic. Bane was blown to smithereens by Catwoman and Miranda/Talia is killed in a car crash. Batman doesn't actually/directly defeat either villain in the film.

Obadiah Stane was blown away by Pepper Pots all Iron Man did was rip out his tracking system ("hold still you little prick", I wouldn't consider that a reason why Iron Man sucked. The death's could have been more spectacular, but Batman's hands had to be kept 'clean' after Dent to redeem him. Batman wouldn't have killed Bane and keeping him alive would be unfitting for a conclusion.


You could write this up about any movie really, the car jacker scene in TASM logically requires Spidey to break into the car before the thief



BigDamnHero
BigDamnHero - 8/2/2012, 5:20 AM
I enjoyed the movie for the mot part, but I do agree with a number of these points. It was flawed and was easily the worst of Nolan's trilogy. Gotta point out though, No.43 is completely incorrect. Bane takes Gordan's letter from his pocket whilst they are in the sewers. Good editorial though, you put a lot of thought into this. Well done!
rcapprotti
rcapprotti - 8/2/2012, 5:53 AM
i bet if someone wanted to give 99 reason TASM sucks or 99 reason the avengers sucks they could but who gives a shit if the fans of those movie love them then thats all that matters.and don't tell me that i am just a nolanites i could give a damn who made TDKR i don't go to a movie because nolan or anybody else made that movie because i am a fan of that movie.and you you dont need to give 99 reason TDKR sucks you could have said that you hate TDKR and saved your self a lot of time
CBMJamie
CBMJamie - 8/2/2012, 5:58 AM
All but 10 of your points I agree with.

Plot-holes are common in blockbusters like this but there comes a point when the amount of them simply becomes ridiculous and detracts from the quality of the film.

I disagree with:

46. The prison is a secret. Looks in the middle of a desert

57. Lucius would know IMO

77. I have a theory that there was a built in miniature aircraft with the Bat tat detaches from the main body. Just like the Batpod from the Tumbler in TDK.

85. They would want Lucius to see Gotham die.

90. Her ‘accomplice’ was a character put in place to show she wasn’t just a thief but someone who cared for others as well.

91. Having him called Robin was genius.

93. The fact he was shooting I think highlighted the severity of the situation. He HAD to try and kill them.

94. We’re never told he DOESN’T have that knowledge.

96. Your Jar-Jar Binks comparison is far too harsh and completely unfair. The line with the ‘never get into cars with strange men’ was cheesy but the one about outrunning someone you stole from fit her character perfectly and wasn’t that cheesy.

98. I think this point is you looking for a flaw. He was there with Talia. Gotham is a whole other world to Bane, and he has had his thoughts manipulated by Talia and Ra’s.

Also, although the bomb wouldn't give off nuclear radiation, the blast would very likely cause a tsunami wave that would hit Gotham.
CBMJamie
CBMJamie - 8/2/2012, 6:00 AM
43. Aswell.

The letter was in Gordon's coat from the event at Wayne Manor. Bane took it.
CBMJamie
CBMJamie - 8/2/2012, 6:07 AM
I would like to say though...

It's quite amusing to see that people are able to come out and say their problems with TDKR and highlight what the issues were, in particular plot-holes.

HOWEVER, when it comes to TDK's large amount of plot-holes many people ignore them.
RidiculousFanBoyDemands
RidiculousFanBoyDemands - 8/2/2012, 6:28 AM
When the only support you have is from the same vocal minority of Nolan haters, that have done nothing but hate on this movie since its inception, chances are you didn't write a good article.

LP4
LP4 - 8/2/2012, 6:29 AM
@Sagemode- You know you didn't read all 99 reasons, don't be silly. You're just a hater of all things Nolan
RidiculousFanBoyDemands
RidiculousFanBoyDemands - 8/2/2012, 6:35 AM
Nuclear blasts don't cause tsunami's. I would recommend taking a chemistry class.

jaysin420
jaysin420 - 8/2/2012, 6:36 AM
Good stuff, but I can't believe you listed 99 reasons and none of them was Bane's hysterically bad voice.

Here's a riddle-

"You were waiting for a movie, a movie that would live up to The Dark Knight...what you got was a total mess....and still it doesn't matter....How can it not matter to you whether the movie sucked or not?

Because Chris Nolan directed it."
Kalel219
Kalel219 - 8/2/2012, 6:40 AM
"Each and every point raised was valid. Don't let the Nolanites get you down" - CPBuff22

#43 is wrong and not valid at all.

Someone clearly did not read all this bullshit
RidiculousFanBoyDemands
RidiculousFanBoyDemands - 8/2/2012, 6:44 AM
I don't think JaySin knows what a riddle is...
CBMJamie
CBMJamie - 8/2/2012, 6:50 AM
@RidiculousFanBoyDemands

Although a huge fan of the trilogy and Nolan, I support this article.
CBMJamie
CBMJamie - 8/2/2012, 7:00 AM
@RidiculousFanBoyDemands

But this bomb wasn't nuclear. People over @NolanFans have done research and believe that although it wouldn't cause a full out tsunami wave, their would be a forceful wave created.

You really are a Nolanite aren't you. Why can't you be a fan but at least an honest one? TDKR was full of mistakes.
BigDamnHero
BigDamnHero - 8/2/2012, 7:05 AM
@RidiculousFanBoyDemands

I'm a fan of this movie, Nolan and all his other movies (I own all but Following and Insomnia on DVD/Blu-Ray), yet I still support this article.
RidiculousFanBoyDemands
RidiculousFanBoyDemands - 8/2/2012, 7:19 AM
Where did I state that the movie was perfect? The movie isn't FULL of mistakes, and most of the crap I read is people picking nits. And no dude it wouldn't have caused a forceful wave either, you have been brainwashed by Hollywood to believe that is what happens when an explosion goes off under water.

I did not like the Prestige or Insomnia.

Nowhere did I say I didn't support the guy for having an opinion. I just said he didn't write a good article, because in all honesty he didn't. I'm all for well thought out constructive criticism of the movie (actually there is a fantastic article on main that does that), but this is just reminds me of that one guy on here that kept getting banned. He also has some youtube channel where all he does is bash Nolan.

Honestly I got up to number two, when the author claims a good 5-10 minutes were wasted with Batman standing on a tower overlooking the city. Ummm, there was a quick 3 second shot before he went to go fight Bane the first time. Then I just skimmed it, reading random points, and I have come to the conclusion that either the author didn't see the movie, or couldn't understand its very simple nature.
MrReese
MrReese - 8/2/2012, 7:46 AM
@RFBD how the hell did u not like the prestige??? I thought the film was brilliant.Insomnia i can understand but the prestige lol

n on topic what movie doesn't have flaws -___- who the [frick] cares it ended the trilogy perfectly.Try 2 name 3rd acts of movies that r watchable??

Terminator 3
Back 2 the Future 3
Spider-Man 3
X-Men 3

ect. none r watchable!!

4 what it was...... it was a great ending 2 what Nolan had in plan.The reason I like nitpickers is because they claim they hate the movie,but in order 2 catch all these flaws it takes multiple viewings.So if u hate the movie soooo [frick]ing much y waste ur [frick]in time trying 2 break it down. lmao!!!!!! ppl just hate 2 hate.

H A T E R S = Having Anger Towards Every1 Reaching Success
CBMJamie
CBMJamie - 8/2/2012, 7:47 AM
@RidiculousFanBoyDemands

The theory regarding the wave is one where the bomb explodes just before impact with the water. That would cause a wave effect. Back to school for you.
MrReese
MrReese - 8/2/2012, 7:49 AM
Anywhooo Look 4 my "99 reasons on why I hated TASM,TDKR & TA" article coming soon hahaha
MrReese
MrReese - 8/2/2012, 7:52 AM
@CBMJamie lol I think dudes a Dr or something so yea u might wanna rethink that. ;-) which I still can comprehend why u didn't like the prestige the movie was full of twists lol
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