Evidence Michael Bay Is Making Another Bad TRANSFORMERS Movie

Evidence Michael Bay Is Making Another Bad TRANSFORMERS Movie

Did yesterday's Transformers trailer look familiar? Well, it should because I believe Michael Bay is once again trying to sell us snake oil. Hit the jump for my trailer analysis.

Editorial Opinion
By DudeGuyMan - Mar 05, 2014 07:03 AM EST
Filed Under: Transformers

Time and time again, fans hope the next Transformers movie will be better than the last, but are mostly left with disappointment. I'm here to prove (with pictures) that this year will be no exception and will just be another Michael Bay 'splosion-fest.

MICHAEL BAY-ISM CHECKLIST

1. Oversexualised female lead with questionable acting skills that is constantly in distress?





CHECK

2. 'Murican flags?








CHECK

3. Easily identifiable villains?





CHECK

4. Product placement?




CHECK

5. Firework explosions?





CHECK

6. Human-centric story?



CHECK

7. Optimus Prime with lips?



CHECK

8. Shots with way too much CGI?





CHECK

Based on my completely biased analysis, I'd say Michael Bay better make room on his shelf for another Razzie.

Leave your comments in the place.
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MrReese
MrReese - 3/5/2014, 7:12 AM
These movies & that trailer did nothing 4 me.Just not my cup o tea I guess.It's crazy how much money they make.
GiantNerd
GiantNerd - 3/5/2014, 7:13 AM
She definitely looks like she is taking the big one in that first still.
Pasto
Pasto - 3/5/2014, 7:23 AM
Not surprised.
Bekss
Bekss - 3/5/2014, 7:38 AM
How funny the people "don't like" the movies, but they still make an amount of money that show us how the people go to see them more than once. Funny

Fireworks explosions? Too much CGI?
That's the only thing nobody can't say is bad, all the movies have the best effects of the year.
IUsedToBeThecase
IUsedToBeThecase - 3/5/2014, 7:44 AM
DADdddddddddddddddddddd
OpticBlastWins
OpticBlastWins - 3/5/2014, 8:19 AM
your arguement makes no sense…. human-centric…. no sht. Movies are created for people so oblviously they need to make the audience feel connected to the characters. If they didnt seem human than nobody would care. Product placement… their cars… Bay still does suck… AMERICA!!!
Zeponi
Zeponi - 3/5/2014, 8:24 AM
I will bitch about this movie as well as Fantastic Four.

I will still see it and then buy the blu ray... I hate myself.
BenjiWest
BenjiWest - 3/5/2014, 8:45 AM
Why would you expect so much different? This franchise is three films in, you should know what to expect. Optimus has been using lips since the very first one...
cipher
cipher - 3/5/2014, 8:51 AM
I need evidence that the dude who's dropping off the mail keeps losing my shit like I f*cking know he is.
Enphlieuwince
Enphlieuwince - 3/5/2014, 9:35 AM
Lol... The sheep on CBM.com are a curiously brazen type. Users on here will latch on to a joke/complaint/criticism like a starving newborn on its mother's teet. The new trailer hasn't been on here a full day yet, but, sooooo many people keep repeating the trivial "Daaadddd!!!" line as if it is truly worthy of so much attention. It's really not that clever and/or funny after the first couple of times you read it. If you're trying to be a hater, at least be somewhat original about it. As DudeGuyMan just demonstrated, there has got to be at least 10-20 other things you could be nitpicking. Please choose one - it's free. Be original or stick to spectating...
MrCBM56
MrCBM56 - 3/5/2014, 1:17 PM
Dumb article. A flag makes a movie bad? You tried way too hard. I would go as far and say this needs to be deleted. I could type a 3 page paper on how this movie will indeed be good, and a HUGE improvement than the last three. If you guys didn't witness the change of tone and action in the trailer, you're blind.

Good bye.
Tainted87
Tainted87 - 3/5/2014, 2:19 PM
It looks like an annoying guy on Facebook who advertises his financial problems constantly, found an old G1 Optimus Prime that wasn't in production, posted it on his status, and got his doors kicked in by Hasbro.

I have no interest, but it has nothing to do with the things you mentioned. You could say the exact same thing for the Winter Soldier trailers, give or take the Optimus Prime lips.

It just has no appealing aspect to me. No characters worth exploring.
Lhornbk
Lhornbk - 3/5/2014, 2:55 PM
The use of the American flag (and no, it's not "'Murican", it's "American") makes a movie bad? Really? That comment alone makes me hope this movie makes a billion. And they're not supposed to have lips? What difference does that make? And yes, it definitely needs to be centered on humans, unless you're a ten year old who just wants to watch cars turn into robots and fight each other.

Oh, and what's wrong with having some eye candy in a movie? (Unless you're ten and just want to see the robots, not girls. Lol.)
Lhornbk
Lhornbk - 3/5/2014, 2:57 PM
If this is satire, then your sense of satire needs work.
Pedrito
Pedrito - 3/5/2014, 3:26 PM
That's plenty of US flags for one trailer.
How many does the Captain America trailer have?
MrCameron
MrCameron - 3/5/2014, 3:47 PM
Yeah I agree with Lhornbk. You could improve you're satire.

But I agree with the premise of the article. I personally believe that people are waaaay to hard on these movies and expect too much from them. Do people really expect a movie based on an old kid's cartoon about giant robots beating the shit out of one another to contain Oscar-worthy performances and a deep, thought-provoking story? Get the [frick] out of there with that bullshit. There is a place in the world for dumb action movies and if that ain't your cup of coffee, go watch something else. In the meantime, I'll be seeing this movie opening weekend with my buddies.
MrCBM56
MrCBM56 - 3/5/2014, 3:51 PM
DudeGuy

It's his signature.
Ace101
Ace101 - 3/5/2014, 5:46 PM
micheal bay:
MightyZeus
MightyZeus - 3/5/2014, 5:48 PM
I could tell that this article was just pure satire. No need to take the article so seriously.

If people enjoy Michael Bay's Transformers then good for them but if people dislike the films then its simple dont watch them. If you dont watch them the movie wont make money and then Bay wont continue to do Transformers movies.
BaronZemo
BaronZemo - 3/6/2014, 5:23 AM
What the [frick] man? Too much CGI? Those are two transformers fighting, what do you want?
Prime
Prime - 3/8/2014, 8:30 AM
It does look like more of the same.

@Reef what does MOS have to do with Michael Bay? let It Go.
CapitanAmerika2
CapitanAmerika2 - 3/23/2014, 7:05 PM
I guess I am in the minority on this site who thinks the Transformers movie are actually pretty good. Michael Bay knows how to make a very epic action movie, and that is what I look for in a CBM. However, I will say that the Transformers series is one of my least favorite series ever. Nearly, every other comic book franchise from Avengers to Batman to Spiderman and Superman top this one when it comes to making quality movies. I think the only series I like less than this series are the Fantastic Four and G.I. Joe movies.
CapitanAmerika2
CapitanAmerika2 - 3/23/2014, 7:16 PM
Oh and Michael Bay must have been doing something right with his last movie Transformers: Dark of the Moon since many directors have used some of the plot devices for that film in their films. For example, Christopher Nolan had Bane and his men seal off Gotham City as a fortress in TDKR, Joss Whedon used the space bridge technique to bring the Chitauri to Earth, and Zack Snyder had General Zod's plan be to a restore planet on Earth.
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