Hey, I wrote an article the other day that wasn't considered an article by the site, so here I am writing an article that is an article. Im just gonna be real first off and say that yes, I am very opinionated, and I will always be so, because its important for all of us to have a voice, and to use it. Its american, and its also a very human right. That doesn't mean you should abuse the power and hate just for the sake of hating. Thats very crass and uncalled for. I admit I have been one of the people that hates sometimes just because and its stupid. I kinda stopped doing it after I realized that it doesn't cause any positive energy, and thats kinda where Im at in life right now. Putting out good energy. Now on to the good stuff!!!
Nolan Batman Trilogy
Nolan thank you sooo much for getting batman so right... and then completely dropping the ball!
What the heck man? Batman Begins was a great take on the character. You hit the nail on the head and from there slowly turned it into this uber dark and kinda not that badass batman. BB is probably the best origin of a superhero movie weve ever got. It was just superb. It had the perfect amount of grit and realism mixed with this understanding of yes this is based on a comic book. Then The Dark Knight comes out and its this super realistic take on the characters and the world and it is a wonderful film... as a film. Yes TDK is a great film, but not soo much a batman film. Its about real people dealing with some really heavy problems. Nolan loses the excitement and replaces it with this dreadful terror and feeling of uneasiness. Its great as a film but I would like the film more if batman had nothing to do with it. If it was about a crazy guy who called himself the joker and a politician who became corrupted and a rich jason bourne then it still would have worked. Which is why I still like the film. But not as a batman film. Its in his world but He just wasn't the batman we got in begins. It was just this angry guy dealing with a crazy guy. Instead of a crazy guy thats a genius dealing with a crazy guy thats just crazy. thats what BB has. Its a guy who gets this crazy idea to become a ninja and then save a city from complete corruption. TDKR!!!!! NOLAN!!!! WHY!?! 8 YEARS? Hes batman! The character you established would have still been fighting, sooo what if he lost rachel. If you can turn losing your parents into becoming who you are you should be past it! Batman is who you are now Bruce Wayne is the mask. I get it Nolan you wanted to go with the theme of anyone could be batman, but by the end of the 2nd movie were left with the feeling of that guy bruce wayne is batman. He would have turned it around and made the world realize he was here for justice not persecution. TDKR was just full of missteps and conformed to a CBM format we know and have seen many times before. Nolan you transcended that crap with TDK, you cant go backwards homie!!!! Check yo self Nolan!
Joss Whedon Needs to Calm Down
Dear Joss Whedon,
I grew up watching Buffy and Angel, loved Dr. Horrible, Firefly is pretty cool, not a dollhouse fan, really enjoyed The Avengers... But you need to calm the f*** down! You gotta stop talking like those D-Bags that run around quoting one line from every classic masterpiece of film or literature or song or poem or whatever hoopla. You come up with a cool story and you have fun dialogue. Im gonna put your ass in check. You aint that tight. You may think you can adapt and direct shakespeare and you can, but you still aint shakespeare homie. Look in the mirror buddy you Joss "Grateful to be a Director" Whedon. Very Talented cat, but seriously stop acting a fool and trying to sound like this cat that went to every Ivy League School in the world but happens to be a comic book writer and tv writer... Check yo self Whedon!
Marvel and Me
Marvel, you are changing the game in cinema, you are a bunch of white guys act like hood n****s and I love it. You fired a high profile oscar winning actor and replaced him with my man Don Cheadle for less, you hired an ex crackhead to be your poster boy, you fired another oscar contending actor for doing the same thing your crackhead poster boy is doing *cough* being very adamant about what the story should be *cough* and replaced him for a cheaper actor again with my man Mark Ruffalo, then you low ball the majority of your actors, unless you re an ex crackhead. Thats some hood ish right there Marvel. I can Dig it... This is what I cant dig. WHERE THE F*** IS MY AFRICAN PRINCE BLACK PANTHER!?! Hes your ticket to changing the game even further! Yes you take risks like replacing actors, and taking a lot of realism out of the films all of a sudden to mae it this crazy alien invasion with wormholes and not much science behind it, and picking a different genre for each film. Having a mostly black superhero film would be next level. Especially because the story is sooo good. Its batman in Africa! Its frikin BLACKMAN! (Im Black i can say that) Its a very big risk, but not as much as hoping you will create a franchise out of a tree and racoon hanging out with my wife Zoe Saldana and my boy Chris Preezy. Marvel make your version of Boys in the Hood, make your version of Menace II Socitey, make your version of Belly, I wanna see Black Panther in Friday! Check yo self Marvel!!!
Batman Forever (NOT THE MOVIE)
Batman is and forever will be my favorite comic book hero. He is a G! #1 in the Hood G!!! Ninja, Genius, Pimp, Hustla, Master of over 100 martial arts. Homeboy is the man. Marvel G livin in a DC world. That makes him even more badass. Hes like yooo Im sooo dope I dont need to mess with you marvel cats Im going to kick it with some DC punk ass gods that are waaaaay more powerful than me, but I know i can whoop they ass anytime of the week! Thats the batman Ive been reading and watching since I was a kid. No one can touch him in my opinion. Ive enjoyed lots of takes of batman in the films and cartoons and books. I can admire each take for what they are but of course I have my favorites. I enjoy seeing the stories continue so Im excited bout affleck coming to the part and zack snyder having a hand and even david goyer(who i cant stand). lets see what happens. CHECK YO SELF FAN BOYS!!! (and ladies!!!)
Superlame
SUPERMAN CAN SUCK THE FATTEST MONKEY NUT. As far as this character goes, WHO CARES??!! youre an alien sent here as a baby to basically be better than us and taunt us... The Snyder film showed us nothing really new to bring to the character. Tried to by adding tons of father son stuff, which got me cuz my dad wasn't around. but other than that there is nothing relatable to superman. Hes a dude from another world with every power known to man, and you cant kill him unless you have a rock from his home-world. And in the snyder universe why the hell would a rock from as far as krypton was away from earth because if you wanna get realistic, why would krypton even be remotely near our star system or galaxy, since there are sooooooooooo many frikin galaxies and star systems!!! why is it happen chance that our sun and our planet is the right planet? Like thats all that movie was. Every thing was convenient. Superman is boring lazy, nothing compelling about him, nothing to relate to. Youre better than me in every way, you will aways get the girl, you got the girl that ive been crushin on since cruel intentions 2, you got these crazy powers that wouldnt even really be as helpful on your planet because your sun was dying, so basically youre stealing all my damn light and energy! Thats for my future generation to absorb and fly around and shoot lasers out of there butts! CHECK YO SELF SUPERMAN!!!!
Conclusion
This was really fun for me. Hope you all have something to say about it. I wanna hear all your crazy thoughts. I like debate, I like drama, I like opinions. JUST DONT BE DICKS!!!
Peace!!
WALLY OUT!!!!