"Alfred, get the cave ready, I'm coming back."
"Did you learn the location of your parent's killer?"
"Yes. He's in Hell."
"I see. That raises the question. If you had found him, would you have killed him?"
"I don't know Alfred. I just don't know. And you know I hate it when you ask those questions."
"I do know Master Bruce. Oh, and you have a Meeting with Oswald Cobblepot tomorrow. Vicki Vale and Jack Ryder will be covering the story."
"Okay then. I'll be at the Bat-cave in 30 minutes. Batman out."
"Batman sir?"
"Why not? I think I'll add a logo to the armor."
"This is full-time now?"
"It always was Alfred. I just kept it from you because you never would have let me do it."
"I suppose not."
BANG BANG BANG!!!
"Alfred, I think I'll be a little late!"
Bruce swerved away from the bullets coming down on him. The Red Hood laughed from inside the jet. Two bullets wounded Batman's forearm, and the bullets kept coming. He put the Bat-mobile into turbo and didn't look back.
Over at the GCPD building, Commissioner Jim Gordon was interrogating a prisoner called Basil Carlo.
"Why did you murder those people? They were remaking your movie. That's a good thing. It was popular enough to be remade."
"Terror. Terror. I am the TERROR!!!!!!!!!!"
"It's hopeless. Get him to the asylum. Now."
"Hey Jim! You might want to look at this. High speed chase. A Jet locked onto a... a weird car. Should we go after them?"
"Fine. Bullok, you take Carlo to the Asylum. I'll go after those guys."
Gordon got inside a police car and took out his phone as he pulled out of the GCPD building.
"Hi, Barbra. I'm going to be a little late. Just an hour and a half more. Love you, bye."
He drove off towards Grayson Ave.
Thorne was on the phone with someone. He was gathering the Red Hood's gang.
"Hello, hello, oh Roman. Hi, how are you? Oh. To your face? Burned on, wow. Say, um, The Hood needs the gang. Why? Oh I was attacked. I don't know! A vigilante. No it was NOT because of my online photos! Those are NOT CRIMES!!!!! Oh my... STOP LAUGHING!!!!!" -click- "Hello, Arnold? I need Scarface. Hello Scarface. Hood's getting the gang together. Some guy attacked me. Another call? Fine...... wait, wait are you LAUGHING!!! ROMAN!!!!!" -click- "Hi Floyd. Hood's getting the, wait you know? And the man? And the photos." -click- "Now I need Carlo."
"Alfred, I'm being attacked by someone in a jet! I can't go to the Cave, he'll find out our base of operations! What do I do?!?!"
"Just keep him busy. He'll run out of fuel, bullets, or patience. I'll contact you if I think of anything else."
"BOTH OF YOU!!! STOP YOUR VEHICLES AND SURRENDER!!!! DO NOT FOLLOW THESE DIRECTIONS AND WE WILL USE EXTREME FORCE!!!!!"
Batman stopped the Bat-mobile and got out of the car. The Red Hood just flew by, knowing that he needed to get Carlo free.
"You, hands up!"
"I don't want a fight. I'm not the bad guy."
He got out a smoke pellet.
"That's what they all say. You don't look like any other criminal I've ever seen. Who are you?"
"I'm Batman."
He threw down the smoke pellet and grappled away. The Bat-mobile roared to life and drove off in auto-pilot.
"Damn it!"
"Terror. Terror. Arg!!!!!!!"
"Shut up back there!"
The Red Hood had the cop in his sights. He went for the kill.
BANG!
The cop dropped dead as the car swerved out of control. It swerved over the Gotham Bridge, and the Hood jumped out of the jet.He slammed into the water. Carlo had gotten to the door, and the Hood opened it. He carried Basil to above the water, and pulled him to shore.
"Thanks. I hated having to be that insane."
Back at Thorne Industries, the gang was talking.
"Hey Arnold. How you doing? What, are you shy? Oh that's right, you're mute. Dumb. May I speak to your puppet?"
"I'm not a freaking PUPPET!!!"
"Sorry Scarface. It's just, you're so... wooden."
"Shut up both of you. The Hood will be here any minute."
"Oh, Floyd you shut up. And speaking of the Hood, who is he anyway?"
"Roman..."
"I said shut up. I heard his name is Jason Todd."
"I heard that his name is Jack White."
"I heard that too Scarface. But I think he has no name, and every name."
"What?"
"He hacks into government files. Changes his name every three days. Sometimes he even gets rid of his name. So he could be anyone. Jason Todd and Jack White included."
"Well, it IS the Red Hood. Anything's possible with him."
"Except a sense of humor."
"My wife married me for my sense of humor."
"Hood! Wait, you have a wife?"
"And kids. Where do you think I go to every night?"
"A coffin?"
"Why would anyone even marry you? You're a criminal!"
"She thinks I sell furniture."
"How can she believe that!?!"
"It's me, remember?"
"Thanks for the patch up Alfred."
"It was nothing."
"So who's this Oswald guy?"
"A fat, disgusting midget with no sense of decency to anything or anyone besides himself."
"Seriously Alfred. Who is he?"
"I AM being serious Master Bruce. He would rather kill you than speak to you."
"How do you know this?"
"I used to be his parent's butler. Spoke nasty things about your family. They said they would like to put your head in a bear-trap when you were a baby."
"Okay then. Sounds like a fun guy. Who's Jack Ryder? And Vicki Vale?"
"Jack Ryder is a reporter who is, might I say, very determined to beat Miss Vale in any story. If they were both reporting on the strange ongoings at BlackGate prison, Ryder would have himself arrested."
"And Vale?"
"She was a reporter in Metropolis. Worked on their newspaper, The Daily Planet. She had an affair with a Mister Clark Kent. But, reporting on TV soon won her over. She's been replaced by Lois Lane. Moved to Gotham, and will not go as far as Ryder for a story, but always comes out with the best one."
"Okay then Alfred. I've got a long, hard day ahead after a long, hard Hell of a night."
"Oh, and Mister Bob Kane wants to talk to you on his show next week. About your return to Gotham."
"Okay Alfred."
2 Months Later
"Okay men. We are here to kill the Batman. There have been sightings of him all over Gotham. Many say he is just an urban legend. We have studied him. Learned his tactics. His strategies. And tonight, we will kill him!"
"Sounds good to me Hood. Say, didn't Thorne give us some nicknames or something?"
"Yes, Roman, he did. So Batman doesn't know who we are."
"Well what are they!?!"
"Calm down Scarface! Okay, Roman, you're the Black Mask. Arnold, you're the Ventriloquist. Floyd, you're DeadShot."
"Black Mask, Ventriloquist, DeadShot! How did he come up with these?"
"Shut it Mask, Terror is causing a distraction for the Bat. The Commissioner is being held hostage, as well as multiple cops. The Bat swoops in, saves the day, and we..."
"Slaughter him. And after what he did to us last month, things have gotten personal."
"Carlo, you there?"
"I hear you loud and clear boss. I think that Gordon's crying here. It's really funny, you guys should see."
"It'll be funny when him and Batman are in a pool of blood.
"Alfred, Bat-wave is going crazy here. Gordon's in danger."
"Ah, well you can't just leave a whole charity event. Especially when Miss Kyle is in it."
"Damn Alfred, you should be helping!"
"Well with a company, friends, and risking your life every night!!! That is it Bruce!!! I'm out of this stupid game!!!"
"Alfred, Alfred!!! Alfred, I'm sorry. Please Alfred, help. I'm sorry."
"-sigh- Okay Master Bruce. It's a two hour long event, 10 minute commercial breaks... start in 1 minute. Go, save Gordon, get back. Now!"
"Thanks Alfred. For everything."
"It was nothing."
Bruce ran out of the building and called the Bat-mobile. He put it on auto-pilot and changed into the Bat-suit.
"Batman hasn't shown up yet. Should I just off the old man?"
"No Basil. Wait. He'll show up... there! Don't kill them. Let him take you out. We'll come in and kill them all."
"Okay boss. Wait WHAT!?!"
Batman sped past the GCPD building.
"What? He left? That isn't right. Arg!!!!"
Batman had snuck up on the Red Hood, and was choking him. He threw him to the other side of the
rooftop. He lept over to the others and did the same with Ventriloquist. But Hood had warned Black Mask, and they both started shooting at him. Batman threw down a smoke pellet and jumped off the building. Mask looked down at the street below, searching for Batman.
"Where did he go?!? Where is he!?!"
"Right here."
BAM!
Hood started firing at Batman, but he was already gone. He looked everywhere, and when he looked up, Batman was right on top of him. He glided into the Bat-mobile and swerved it around. He put it into boost and crashed through the GCPD building, knocking down Carlo.
"You're safe now. Jim, do you still think I'm the bad guy?"
"No. Not at all. I'm sorry about what happened the last time we met."
"Don't worry. I had someone take out the bullet."
Part 4 coming soon!!!!!!!!!!!!