First off, there is a slim chance of this movie getting made because a lot of religious groups would boycott it. So this is just for fun.
Anyway, I want Darren Aronofsky to direct it. He's probably one of the best directs working today. I heard that he wanted to adapt the comic. But a bunch of n00bs had to give it to DJ Caruso, whose movies suck. Out of all the stupid choices Hollywood has made, this one almost takes the retard cake. The one that takes the cake is John Chu directing the G.I. Joe sequel.
For the score, I want Trent Reznor to do it. Why? BECAUSE HE"S TRENT FRAKKIN' REZNOR!! HE HAS AN OSCAR FOR BEST SCORE FOR "THE SOCIAL NETWORK"!!
Anyway, on with the cast!!
Heroes:
Josh Holloway as Jesse Custer: An out-of-work preacher in the small town of Annville, Texas. He becomes fused with an entity called "The Genesis", the unholy offspring of an angel and a demon. The Genesis gives him the power to order people to do what he commands. With this power (which he calls "The Word of God"), he begins a journey across America, with the goal of making God to answer for His creation of His sins. Besides "The Word of God", he is also an expert hand-to-hand combatant. He firmly believes in justice and chivalry and is not unwilling to punish those who brutalize innocent people.
Reason for Casting: To me, he's the perfect Jesse. He was brilliant on "Lost" and he has the accent for Jesse.
Katee Sackhoff as Tulip O'Hare: Jesse's romantic interest, who is a markswoman with an exceptional skill. SHe was raised by her father father, Jake O'Hare, who introduced her to the concepts of hunting, fishing, and war stories.
Reason for Casting: I made a connection between Tulip O'Hare and Sackhoff's character on "Battlestar Galactica" (Starbuck). Katee can be beautiful while at the same time be a total badass.
Colin Farrell as Proinsias Cassidy: A hard-drinking Irish vampire, who became one over 70 years ago. He has a strong friendship with Jesse and has feelings for Yulip, who does not return them. His powers include superhuman speed and strength, and an accelerating healing factor, which is enhanced when he drinks blood. The only thing that can kill him is direct exposure to sunlight, although he can survive indirect exposure with discomfort. He often substitutes his thirst for blood with beer or whiskey, but he does drink the blood of humans who threaten him.
Reason for Casting: I know alot of you think that Farrell is a bad actor, but he can be a good one if he is given the right material. He was great in "Tigerland" and "In Bruges". Plus, he is playing a vampire in "Fright Night" (which is a relief since I'm getting sick of all these sparkling vampires).
Villains:
Mads Mikkelsen as Herr Starr: A member of The Grail, a secret organization who controls most of the world's governments and protects the blood the bloodline of Jesus (whose descendant is now an inbred, mentally retarded teenager. He has five scars on his right eye, which he received from school bulles when he was younger.
Reason for Casting: I was originally going to go with Stellan Skarsgård, but then I remebered Mads Mikkelsen in "Casino Royale". He was brilliant in that and he automatically became my choice for Herr Starr.
Clint Eastwood as The Saint of Killers: A former Confederate soldier who became the Angel of Death after freezing Hell over with his hatred (much to the Devil's annoyance). He wields two Colt Walker revolvers that kill anything, never miss their target, never leave his possession, and never runs out of bullets.
Reason for Casting: I know that Clint isn't acting anymore (he's now a director), but he would fit this role so perfectly.
Kurtwood Smith as Sheriff Hugo Root: The racist, alcoholic sheriff of Annville, who beats his son for trivial reasons and thinks that "Martian [Derogatory term for an African Anerican in plural form]" are the cause of all of America's problems.
Reason for Casting: I think Kurtwood is a great actor, but I frakkin' hate his character on "That 70's Show" (who is a cranky dick who bullies his son and makes empty threats of shoving his foot up people's asses). He would be great in this role.
Miscellaneous:
Liam Neeson (voice) as God:The all-knowing creator who is all-loving, but also narcissistic and views himself as perfection itself. He flees his throne in Heaven after Jesse is bonded with the Genesis
Reason for Casting: He has already played a god (Zeus in "Crash of the Titans"). Plus he is an amazing actor.
Justin Bieber as Arseface: Hugo Root's abused son and bully victim, who trues to commit suicide (like his idol, Kurt Cobain), by placing a shotgun under his chin, but instead severely deforms his face. Due to extensive plastic surgery, his face (according to Cassidy), "looks like an arse." (hence the name).
Reason for Casting: I heard that Cross wanted Bieber to play a superhero that is "mute and invisible", so I did the next best thing. You don't have to see his ugly, douche bag face (since it is severely deformed), and you won't have to here his voice (it will be muffled and supplied by subtitles). I know he's an extremely terrible actor (he makes Channing Tatum look like a good actor, Keanu Reeves look like Laurence Oliver, and the acting in the "Twilight" films look Oscar-worthy), but perfect matches only come this often. Plus, if Woodinator can have Robert Pattinson as The Messiah, it's only fair that I can have Bieber as Arseface.
Please leave your thoughts and comments below!!!