JackyTimish Editorial Special: Do We Really Need Another Superman? And How He Can Be Improved!

JackyTimish Editorial Special: Do We Really Need Another Superman? And How He Can Be Improved!

I want to discuss whether Superman really has a huge cultural impact today, my name is JackyTimish!

Editorial Opinion
By PsychoManiacJacky - Mar 22, 2013 05:03 AM EST
Filed Under: Superman



Hello everybody, CBM just cut half of my editorial so sorry about the missing intro. It is me JackyTimish. So now moving on...

Like come on really for a man boasting about Justice and Peace for over 50 years there is a line were you have to cross to say no more. Perhaps lay it down and give it a new modern edge. I'm not talking about the 52 version, wow that version is so hipster-ish. I mean come on really. Getting rid of his tightie reds doesn't make a difference he's still the same old fashioned over symbolic character. You know what I'm going tell you this straight up, I don't know much about comics but I do know so much to tell you HOW they can FIX this slowly fading character of the century.

First of all Superman, meh such a cheesy name. It was good in the 70s or whenever but come on. Yeah I think the word "Super" has really been outdone on the classy. How about the name the "Krimson Krypton Knight" aka "KKK"! It brings a new edge to the character. It brings a much needed seriousness. Like really Superman worked back then when imaginations were just off the LSD charts. With "Krimson Krypton Knight" you have a name not only representing his home planet yo but you got a name showing his pride in true 3 short symbolic words and a nice catchy paraphrase apprised to the one S on the costume, we have 3 proud but short memorable letters. I mean really I am sure they didn't call him Superman on Krypton so why not have a name that can transfer to everywhere!

Now the costume, get rid of those darn red and blues. It doesn't make any sense anymore! So an alien comes crashing on this planet supposedly in the colours of The American Flag!? It's too symbolic no one is going to buy that crap anymore. There needs to be a more alien element with the costume. That is why I say make the costume just plain white. White gives it a meaning of something different and something more encouraging. Making the costume just white and no cape at all why a cape if he can fly with no problems at all. Give it a leather like scale texture with a soft cotton feel and make it a one piece plumber like outfit. This is another culture that has to differ from many. Also using the same like S sign chest piece but to paraphrase the new name "Krimson Krypton Knight". Also give him a mask, make the mask white too again for a stronger impact. I think the mask would represent how more different he is to Earth's own customs. I think Superman should also have a distant accent to him. Like a different voice of another far away stranger or traveler. Like a nice warm comforting deep south southern accent. Still somehow making him a man ahead of our time. Speaking of that get rid of Clark Kent. He needs a new identity. How about Mark Lucas to give a more modern take of Clark Kent. So now our hero is known as Mark Lucas.

Supporting characters in the story change them too. Get rid of the whole Daily Planet reporter thing. For Lois Lane in the story, make Lois a nurse at a mental asylum. So our hero "Mark Lucas" gets committed to the asylum and he meets Lois there developing a strong friendship. They are not in love though as Lucas has another preference to another gender (I will get to that later). He has a brief sensual moment. So yeah years later he later finds out Lois Lane is a figment of his own imagination but Lois Lane always keeps coming back to torment him in his mind. He is just so heart broken and stressed he wants her to go away. So he escapes the asylum and searches for another person named Lois Lane and kills her. No it doesn't work that one Lois Lane from the asylum has followed him in his head and still appears in his mind. Now he must live with the agony of his far fetched imagination out to murder him slowly, unless he changes. Mark Lucas aka Krimson Krypton Knight now works as a male stripper in the story. It is all apart of the new bold darker take. There he meets another woman named Lois Lane who is a regular customer to the club and slowly accepts she is real as she looks like the same Lois Lane previously seen in the story (Also played by the same actor). Perry White is also still his boss in the story, okay name change too "Perry Spankles". Jimmy Olsen is a veteran male stripper in the story who takes Mark Lucas under his wing on his new daring career path. This all part of the darker take we need to revamp this character. If DC is slowly introducing gay homosexual characters then why not do this. There are other groups out there that need to be represented and this is a great way to start.

Next his villains need to change up a bit. Lex Luthor needs to be a total psychotic freak of nature. He needs to be a man hell bent on destruction. A man with a demon inside him. No I'm not kidding. Give Lex Luthor satanic powers of hell. Make him a nightmarish demon. An extreme business man thirsty for power who makes a pact with the underworld wanting to gain more power. He realized he made a mistake but it was too late. He is now commuted by soul to do evil deeds for his dark master. One of his deeds is to rid the earth of The Krimson Krypton Knight. He has half of hell in control and an army of demons on his side. He is an out of control monster within a simple minded human. The perfect Lex Luthor to reintroduce to the world of comics. Also give him a sick romantic edge, a dark love story. For example he could be in deep love with Mark Lucas aka The Krimson Krypton Knight but he is trying to resist his demonic powers to kill him, they both love each other truly and want to be openly together but they can't.It opens for many new stories and brings a new element, the element of horror which has been missing. Horror can bring a new terrifying darkness which is what this character needs. Gone are the friendly themes but an extremely dark sadistic version spilling blood and guts killing anyone that stands in his path of hellish destruction.

How about General Zod. You know what bothers me is that they said he is not a villain at all in Man of Steel. NO, that is not how you do his character screw those bad vibe themes whatever they are trying to bring in. Zod is supposed to be ruthless BAMF who doesn't take crap at all. Zod needs to be the ultimate destroyer of worlds. He needs to be totally indestructible. Zod needs to be an out of control super being. Doomsday for one needs an update too. Call him Doom. Instead of being a rocky like alien creature, make him an alien demon. An alien demon bent on destroying him at all cost. In simple terms give all the villains a kick ass revamp and make them all psychotically insane. Insanity is what is missing and what this new take needs. Another thing get rid of the name Metropolis. Give it a more gothic feel. Call it "Trampolis". It gives it a more new futuristic feel. It makes it sound like a more horrible place to be in.

Last things last new origins. Last one off the dying planet of Krypton? How about something more in depth. Like he was born as a mistake and he was quickly sent on a ship to another planet. Within moments his dad Jor-El goes on a chaotic emotional rampage destroying the planet nearly killing everyone then blowing it up, Zod was among the survivors. It gives more of a deep impact. Your a man with super powers what do you do not what you are destined to do. It gives him some more thought like, if I was the mistake why should I correct the mistakes of others. Why do I symbolize Justice in the first place is the question that should be thought of. Giving a story a more deep emotional impact makes everyone relate more to the actual context of what is going on. Also get rid of the whole some family on Earth took him in. Make him a man raised in the wilderness forced to survive on his own before moving up to the big city. A man raised by a pack of wolves or some kind of animal. It gives a representation of a new meaning. Maybe he also mated with one of these wolf animals and now he has a wolf son who is sort of a new take on Krypto The Super Dog. This wolf who is his son has super powers like him and helps him along his journey. A wolf is always represented as a calm spiritual creature so him having a son who is a wolf and a family of wolves represents an alienated man looking for his lost soul including who he is. The reality is we need to think much deeper and as humans we need to look further past a normal range. If time is moving then we should move with time and if the Earth is moving we should move too. We need to keep a stable balance on the Earth and not have it weigh down on us. We need to keep in mine our sole purpose to have a remembrance to those before us. It is something which qualifies us to...oh sorry I got off topic there moving on. Oh yeah instead of Kryptonite as his weakness make it something more human like. Like he develops an allergy to Earth's grass or the air or some people he meets.

In this new representation I have in mind I would choose actor Justin Long to portray him. Justin Long has played a Superhero before in a parody and in all seriousness he just seems like the guy who would best portray an average hero. Channing Tatum as Jimmy Olsen since the character portrait description matches him in my opinion. Matthew McConaughey as the brand new Perry White. Zachary Quinto as Lex Luthor. Emily Mortimer as Lois Lane.In order to make this work they would to give this a hard R rating, otherwise if not keeping within PG13 to PG limits while giving it what it needs. We can still have a Superman but he needs to change and my take on it is what this character desperately needs. If you have any questions or comments or any opinions please state so in the comment section I will do my best to reply. I will like to thank you all for reading. I have also posted some music if you want to listen to while you think of a comment, helps the mind going.

Have a Bright (Beep) Sunny Day,

- Jacky Timish

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tonytony
tonytony - 3/22/2013, 6:09 AM
Im gonna take a guess that the author of this is homosexual.
CaptainDC
CaptainDC - 3/22/2013, 7:00 AM
1) Nobody wanted this editorial
2) Change supermans origins? Shame on you
Tainted87
Tainted87 - 3/22/2013, 7:03 AM
One does not simply read a JackyTimish article....
TheManFromMars
TheManFromMars - 3/22/2013, 7:05 AM
Jacky in his natural habitat

TheRaven20
TheRaven20 - 3/22/2013, 7:12 AM
Oh great this guy's back...
PsychoManiacJacky
PsychoManiacJacky - 3/22/2013, 7:46 AM
@tonytony

No I just like the idea of supporting the minority and giving them a good image

and @everyone

I'm glad you are liking my new editorial so far, I thought my mind was running blank haha! More great wonders to come soon!
JM4Superman
JM4Superman - 3/22/2013, 8:10 AM
Change Superman's origin? Ok then [frick] you
Dynamo
Dynamo - 3/22/2013, 9:19 AM
Trolololololololo
ToTheManInTheColdSweat
ToTheManInTheColdSweat - 3/22/2013, 9:45 AM
goood good, jacky boy. i'm [frick]ing proud of you ^_^
GuardianDevil
GuardianDevil - 3/22/2013, 10:25 AM
This makes no sense at all, are you nuts?

"I don't know much about comics"
Then why,may I ask are you on this site? If you're not into comics.
AINTNOTHINTOFOCWIT
AINTNOTHINTOFOCWIT - 3/22/2013, 10:54 AM
jack ass
kong
kong - 3/22/2013, 11:13 AM


OrgasmicPotatoe
OrgasmicPotatoe - 3/22/2013, 11:46 AM
[frick]in trolls.
knocturnalzen10
knocturnalzen10 - 3/22/2013, 1:14 PM
it's my first time reading one of his articles i dunno what to think of it?.........................
is he being serious ?
FreddyMac
FreddyMac - 3/22/2013, 1:23 PM
Is English this guy's 3rd language?
95
95 - 3/22/2013, 7:45 PM
I had to thumbs this up. It's original fan fiction, at it's best. Comedic genius, Jacky. It was a hilarious read.
Ghostt
Ghostt - 3/23/2013, 7:43 PM
It's awesome they let you contribute on here jacky. I work with individuals with developmental disabilities, and I feel like I'm at work reading this article. You are special. Good job, buddy.
StormLoganSummers
StormLoganSummers - 3/23/2013, 8:38 PM
LMAO!!!


PsychoManiacJacky
PsychoManiacJacky - 3/24/2013, 12:27 AM
fangz I would like to thank you for the being the most informative person here based on this editorial. Yes I share the same ideals that there needs to be an update, but is everyone ready for it? If we keep on waiting forever we would never know. That is why a bold new step is good. Even if people don't like it they should just suck it up. Godzilla is different, we have different heroes, and we have different ways of life. In reality we have been changing for decades as humans, but if we can't handle a simple change like this to a comic book character then we are just hopeless. Might as well quit humanity if people can't realize when enough symbolism is enough. Especially based on Superman's old fashioned ideals. Captain America gradually evolved to a more modern present day sense, then why the hell can't Superman.
TheTank
TheTank - 3/24/2013, 1:39 PM
Ive never seen yellow in an american flag for starters, Joe Shuster said he went with that color scheme because it was all primary colors...which it is.

The name Superman is a philosophical term meaning the advanced man, its not some stupid name like Ultra Man or Captain Supreme or something, the name had a meaning, it wasn't used like "Oh boy thats super" kind of way.

And I need Superman, the world needs Superman, people need an iconic character who represents the best in all of us, or have we become that jaded that every character needs to be some kind of dark gritty anti hero.
TheTank
TheTank - 3/24/2013, 1:54 PM
Superman's origins were based on Moses escaping egyptian slaughter by having his parents place him in a basket and sending him up river to be found by someone that could raise him, and his name is routed in hebrew. Anything with the suffix "EL" means of God, i.e MichEL, GabriEL, AriEL, RachEL. El was the original name for God in the Israelite/Canaanite religion. El was God most high, and eventually the entire pantheon was eliminated and he became the sole deity of the Israelites.

To change Superman's origins is to change the parallels that Siegel and Shuster were purposely going for when creating the character.

Superman stirs me in the same positive way that I feel when i read some of the most epic stories of the bible, he was created to inspire a feeling of hope. Im tired of people trying to play up the themes of alienation and loneliness in Superman in order to make him more identifiable with modern audiences who from the looks of the way things are going have no moral compass whatsoever.
hench
hench - 3/25/2013, 7:45 PM
um...
AZSuperman
AZSuperman - 3/28/2013, 2:39 PM
Dude, I haven't made it through your first paragraph and I hate you already. Not cool bro, Not cool.
AZSuperman
AZSuperman - 3/28/2013, 2:41 PM
Yep it just got worse and worse....damn bro....you know what?

I'm not mad

I'm not angry

I'm JUST disappointed

AZSuperman
AZSuperman - 3/28/2013, 4:21 PM
@Ghostt, best post EVER.

Jackie my boy! You've made Chris, George, Jerry and every one else turn over in their grave.
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