Things That Have Been Bugging Me

I'm just going to cut to the chase on this one. A few things I've come across on this site or the internet as a whole have been bugging me. I'm here to simply set it all straight.

1. Scientifically inaccurate Spider-Man

Anyone ever see this cartoon?

http://www.collegehumor.com/embed/6874420/scientifically-accurate-spider-man

People really think spiders are gay? This is the ONE thing I HATE about the internet. It makes stupid people even dumber. They think they've learned something when in fact they just ate up some ridiculous thing someone put on the internet. College humor, while doing their "extensive research" into unknown facts about spiders simply googled "spider facts." Which brought them to this site.

http://www.hamtwoslices.net/spiders.htm

For those of you who don't know, this site is a joke site. What makes it worse are there are some facts that are actually true in the scientifically accurate Spider-Man cartoon. Which makes it harder for some people to catch the lies. Yes spiders are covered in hair (most species anyway) but no their web doesn't actually come out of their anus it comes from spinnerets, and no their penis's don't fall off. They don't even have penises, they have palps. Which, believe it or not, is different.

So no, spiders are not gay nor does a single strand of spider web have more potential energy than the bomb dropped on Nagasaki. You'd think for a group that pride themselves on having "informed" humor you'd think college humor would have made sure their facts were actually facts.

Oh, and for the record, when two males spiders come across each other both of which are looking for a female to mate with, they fight until the death and the winner eats the looser. I myself have never met a gay couple that does that. Just saying.

2. In The Avengers the HULK all the sudden could control his anger.

Ok. Making this one quick because I spent WAAAY too long on the last one. The movie The Incredible HULK was all about Bruce Banner learning to take control. He studied Krav Maga in order to control it. THE FRIGGEN MOVIE STARTS WITH HIM MEDITATING! THE MOVIE ENDS WITH HIM FINALLY LEARNING TO CONTROL IT! DID YOU PEOPLE SERIOUSLY NOT SEE THE MOVIE OR SOMETHING?! AHHH!

And the reason he lost control on the helicarrier is two fold. One Loki's scepter was messing with his head. Remember? And two, he just got blown up. He can control his anger and turn into the HULK when he wants and maintain a certain level of control. But when something like that happens (Loki+Explosion) he might loose control.

So, he didn't "all the sudden" learn to control his anger. They devoted an entire movie to showing the audience he could control his anger and the HULK most of the time.

3. In The Avengers Iron Man fell back down to the portal. But in space there is no gravity!

Ok. This one might be hard for some of you to get, but I'll try. We know that gravity is a stronger force than light. Because we have observed light being bent when a black hole is present in outer space. Meaning photons are affected by gravity. Following so far? On the other side of the portal we can see earth. Which means photon particles (light) are coming through the portal as well as aliens and ships. The fact we can see earth through the portal means light is coming through. And if photons can travel through the portal, gravity would as well. Which means earth's gravity would still be pulling on Iron Man. So yes, he would fall back into the portal as long as a planet was on the other side of it.

Ok, that's it. I'm done. Thanks for reading guys, this was seriously cathartic for me. Peace out.

PS Andrew Garfield IS a much better Spider-Man and Peter Parker than Maguire EVER WAS! I know I said no opinions, just facts. But hey, this is my article.