STAR WARS: Sideshow And Hot Toys Present The 'Boba Fett' Sixth Scale Figure

^^^ Is monkeyballs in real life ^^^

Never liked the repainted ROTJ armor.

Let's take a look back at Boba Fett's unimpressive and uneventful on screen appearances:

First, Vader hires a fleet of bounty hunters to track Solo. Since Boba sat there and was the last one to leave, he happened to notice Han was there hiding the whole time and then followed him to Bespin. Once there, Darth Vader captured, tortured, and froze Han Solo himself in order to test the carbon freezing chamber for use on Luke Skywalker. What did Boba do this whole time? Stood there. He almost shot Chewbacca when he protested, but Vader was like "This ain't Ferguson Missouri, Fett. Sit your ass down". Once completely incapacitated, Boba then had Han loaded up into the Slave I like a hunk of furniture he was delivering to Jabba the Hut. That's right, Boba Fett was the delivery guy. End of Boba Fett's display of "badassness" in Empire Strikes Back.

Turn to Return of the Jedi, where Jabba is currently in possession of his favorite decoration, Han Solo. Where's Boba? Still chilling at Jabba's Palace, where he's been sitting around lazily for the past 3 years since the end of Empire. Again, Boba *almost* shoots at Leia (disguised of course) for threatening Jabba with a Thermal Detonator. After Jabba's like "you threatened me for a higher payout... that just works" Boba lays his arms down and takes notes from this experience. Fast forward a while, shit is going down on the Sail Barge. Luke is SLAYING away at some Jabba-minions across the way, and Boba of course has to take unnecessarily long to dramatically line up his shot on the last of the Jedi, when a bumbling blind guy just happens to knock into his jetpack and send him flying off. What does 'the most feared bounty hunter in the galaxy' do then? Well, he doesn't take control of the situation like a proven badass should. Instead he flails and screams all the way to smacking his dumb face into the Sail Barge, and then rolls away to his pitiful death of slowly being digested inside of the Sarlacc.

Now, I know what you're gonna say. "The Expanded Universe says he lives". Well, the expanded universe has been done away with, and no longer holds any kind of claim in the canon. And you're also going to say "But the producers said that he'll still be alive in the movies." Yes, and I'm sure they'll find a shitastic reason to say why he's still living, and I'm sure it'll be just as shitastic and uneventful as his on-screen life was.

Hopefully they reveal in the new trilogy that Boba Fett survived the Sarlacc.

stupidest death ever