My Mother "Reviews" Man of Steel

My Mother "Reviews" Man of Steel

I, TheManFromMars, have watched MoS yesterday and wondered if I should post a review, but after having an... interesting discussion about the movie with my mother, I thought you guys may find her thoughts about the movie a little more entertaining than mine...

Editorial Opinion
By TheManFromMars - Jun 29, 2013 11:06 AM EST
Filed Under: Superman



Hi, folks. I am TheManFromMars and yesterday I saw Man of Steel for the first time with my mother.

The theater was full, (There was even a guy dressed in full Superman costume. Cape and undies) and we had to sit on the third row, eyes glued to the screen. Suprisingly, it didn't bother me, but my mom thought it was uncomfortable, and gave her a headache.

My mother loves watching Superhero Movies, but she's still extremelly comic illiterate, and she has a hard time remembering fictional characters' names. The only Hero alter egos she knows are Clark Kent, Peter Parker, and Tony Stark.

As soon as the movie ended and the words "Man of Steel" appeared on the screen, we had this conversation:

Mom: Will this have an extra scene like those other ones?

Me: Like Marvel's? No, I don't think so...

Mom: Good. So we can go home.

Me: So... What did you think of the movie?

Mom: Too much destruction! I mean, those buildings... Superman is supposed to save people! How much did he kill?

Me: Yeah, this is a criticism some people are having with the movie. So, you didn't like it?

Mom: No, I liked it. I really did.

Me: What did you think of Henry Cavill?

Mom: Who?

Me: The new Superman.

Mom: Oh, he was hot.

Me: You think he was better than Christopher Reeve?

Mom: Oh, those blue eyes... Reeve was hot too when he was younger.

Me: That's not exactly what I meant, but okay. You know, there was an Eater Egg in the movie, but I didn't want to tell you in the theater to not disturb the other people. And it was too fast, so you wouldn't notice it anyway.

Mom: What was it?

Me: You know when Zod and Superman are fighting in space and they hit a satelite? On the side of the satelite was the logo of Wayne Enterprises!

Mom:?

Me: You know what that means?

Mom: John Wayne?

Me: No. Bruce Wayne.

Mom:?

Me: Batman.

Mom: Batman? (Laughs) They were trying to kill each other!

Me: I'm sorry, what?

Mom: They're neighbors on Krypton!

Me: Mom, Batman is not from Krypton.

Mom: Superman is.

Me: I know that. (A half hour later) You know, about the movie again, there was one, two actually, memes about Superman's fathers that I thought were funny.

Mom: Which father?

Me: Both. One is about how both actors who played Superman's fathers played Robin Hood in the past.

Mom: They did?

Me: Yeah. The other one shows a picture of Jor-El and says "Died saving his son from a planet's destruction" and then a picture of Jonathan Kent saying "Died saving a dog from a tornado".

Mom: Yeah. And the dog's name was Jonathan.

Me: No. The dog's name was Hank.

Mom: Who was Jonathan?

Me: The father!

Mom: (Laughs) They were yelling "Jonathan! Jonathan!" I thought they were calling the dog. And the father opened the door, saved the dog, and was killed. And Superman did nothing.

Me: Well, he wanted to. But his father didn't let him. There were too many witnesses. He needed to protect his secret.

Mom: Bullshit! He needed to save his father! What was the name of the movie again?

Me: Man of Steel. Why?

Mom: Well, it's Superman. It should have been "Superman". Then again, that guy didn't look very "Superman" to me...

Me: What do you mean?

Mom: The other guy was kicking his ass!

Me: Zod?

Mom: Yeah, his uncle.

Me: Zod wasn't his uncle.

Mom: Wasn't he the brother of his father?

Me: No.

Mom: What was he?

Me: A General.

Mom: Oh.

Me: What did you think about Superman having to break his neck in the end?

Mom: He had to! He was about to cut those people up with those eyes! Who were them?

Me: Civillians.

Mom: Yeah, at first I thought it was his mother, but then I saw they had children... So yeah, he had to kill him.

Me: Mom, I think I'm gonna write an article on the Internet about what you thought, if you don't mind...

Mom: What? A review? You're gonna write my thoughts and yours?

Me: Not mine. Just yours.

Mom: Why? You think they're interesting?

Me: I think they're funny.

Mom: Why?

Me: You keep forgetting the characters' names, plot points, and the title of the movie!

Mom: Damn right, I do!

Me: (Laughs)

Mom: BOOM! Snapped Neck!
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LEVITIKUZ
LEVITIKUZ - 6/29/2013, 11:50 AM
The dog was named Hank?
DRMidNite
DRMidNite - 6/29/2013, 11:50 AM
That was...AWESOME!
TheManFromMars
TheManFromMars - 6/29/2013, 11:51 AM
This was an actual conversation I had with my mother. I didn't make anything up. I may have forgotten some things, but I didn't add anything.

Most movie discussions with my mother go something like this, to be honest.
DrainBamage
DrainBamage - 6/29/2013, 12:17 PM
Best review I've read so far.
NBAfanaddict
NBAfanaddict - 6/29/2013, 12:23 PM
Me: You know when Zod and Superman are fighting in space and they hit a satelite? On the side of the satelite was the logo of Wayne Enterprises!

Mom:?

Me: You know what that means?

Mom: John Wayne?

And boom goes the dynamite. This was awesome.
kong
kong - 6/29/2013, 12:41 PM
Only entertaining MOS review on the site. Good call on uploading this.
Emjeed
Emjeed - 6/29/2013, 12:52 PM
LMAO.. "They were neighbors on krypton!" "His uncle" Dude.. You have to start a podcast where you discuss superhero movies with your mom. Just don't let her know it's being recorded
MrCameron
MrCameron - 6/29/2013, 12:54 PM
Funny stuff dude.

Thankfully, my mom isn't that comic-illiterate (at least when it comes to Marvel, I had to explain a few things to her after MoS)
GoILL
GoILL - 6/29/2013, 1:01 PM
This was pretty funny to read.
LucasMend
LucasMend - 6/29/2013, 1:17 PM
haha, this was awesome. you should have recorded a video of this conversation.
BIGBMH
BIGBMH - 6/29/2013, 1:22 PM
Haha! Nice article!
LEVITIKUZ
LEVITIKUZ - 6/29/2013, 1:28 PM
I told my Dad to see MOS on Fathers Day with my mom and brother and I asked my mom about the movie and she couldn't get Cavil out if her head. She loved him and my Dad and me looked at each other.

Hehe, poor dad.
StrangeBlackPantherDoctor
StrangeBlackPantherDoctor - 6/29/2013, 1:36 PM
Awesome Review.
MarvelWeiner
MarvelWeiner - 6/29/2013, 1:55 PM
There was a dog in the movie?
WawelDragon
WawelDragon - 6/29/2013, 2:27 PM
Remind me my mom, cool :D
RichardHedski
RichardHedski - 6/29/2013, 2:34 PM
Just because someone's mom likes it doesn't mean it's a good movie. This movie is still tanking at the box office as we speak... just saying.
inkslinger616
inkslinger616 - 6/29/2013, 2:59 PM
@OhThePurdue...dude I get it you didn't like MOS this review was meant to be funny and it was [frick]in hilarious but then you stroll in and start shouting, "Troll here get your troll I'm a troll and I didn't like MOS!" Okay you didn't like it, but you are acting like a whiny little Twilight girl on her period. Is it hard to wake up everyday and say, " Ya know i don't think I'm enough of a bitch so I think I should get online and piss and moan about movies that I didn't like, Yeah, yeah thats the ticket, I have finally found a way to be more of a bitch than I already am! Bwahahahahahahaha!" Go eat a Midol have some ice cream and rest your vagina little lady. SMH...what a whiny bitch.
inkslinger616
inkslinger616 - 6/29/2013, 3:00 PM
@The Man From Mars...that was one of the most entertaining things I've read on this site. Good work your mom sounds awesome
JoeMomma29
JoeMomma29 - 6/29/2013, 3:08 PM
This is awesome!!!!!! Great Review!!!!!
Brainiac13
Brainiac13 - 6/29/2013, 3:08 PM
@The Man From Mars

I love this review! This is different and unique!

@OhThePurdue

Being slow, stupid, blockheaded, dull, dumb and ignorant must be a privilege for you!!!

TheManFromMars
TheManFromMars - 6/29/2013, 3:08 PM
Holy Shit! I'm on main!

It's probably gonna be taken down in a few minutes, but thank you guys anyway!
JoeMomma29
JoeMomma29 - 6/29/2013, 3:09 PM
By the way good for you for going to a movie with your mom as well.
JoeMomma29
JoeMomma29 - 6/29/2013, 3:09 PM
Naw I am voting a big thumb up and everyone else should as well!
JoeMomma29
JoeMomma29 - 6/29/2013, 3:12 PM
@ OhthePurdue

Dang you cannot even troll cleverly at all, you hate the movie so much but yet you take time out of your day to post such stupidity!!!

Brainiac13
Brainiac13 - 6/29/2013, 3:13 PM
@JoeMomma29

That Psycho yesterday.....real funny bloke! LOL!
JoeMomma29
JoeMomma29 - 6/29/2013, 3:16 PM
@ Brainiac

I agree that dude was off his rocker! But that was funny how your responded to him.
Brainiac13
Brainiac13 - 6/29/2013, 3:17 PM
@JoeMomma29


I enjoy it sometimes! But when someone thick in the head like him....he needed help!

LOL!

JoeMomma29
JoeMomma29 - 6/29/2013, 3:21 PM
Hey my wife drooled through the whole movie, the funny thing is I started to drool as well. I have to admit Cavill is freakin hot!!!!

Yeah that's right I said and yes I am secure in man hood to say it as well!
Shaggy
Shaggy - 6/29/2013, 3:22 PM
yeah... it sure is tanking at the box office with its what? $600M?

you can trololol these comments all you want saying it was bad, and I'll agree with you on that, but if you say it's a commercial failure you're just being an idiot
Shaggy
Shaggy - 6/29/2013, 3:23 PM
$400M, my bad
Brainiac13
Brainiac13 - 6/29/2013, 3:24 PM

@JoeMomma29

LOL!


Shaggy
Shaggy - 6/29/2013, 3:27 PM
it's still making more than Captain America and Thor ever did (as if it [frick]ing matters anyway).
just keep that in mind next time you claim it's bombing
AdamX
AdamX - 6/29/2013, 3:27 PM
Awesome review lol.
JoeMomma29
JoeMomma29 - 6/29/2013, 3:28 PM
Awwww Splenda that is sweet! At least you pointed out the good with the bad.
airbeyonder18
airbeyonder18 - 6/29/2013, 3:31 PM
Genius....
spider1489
spider1489 - 6/29/2013, 3:35 PM
lol
plan99fromouterspace
plan99fromouterspace - 6/29/2013, 3:35 PM
"I told my Dad to see MOS on Fathers Day with my mom and brother and I asked my mom about the movie and she couldn't get Cavil out if her head. She loved him and my Dad and me looked at each other.

Hehe, poor dad."

Cue sitcom audience laughter or if you're Hispanic, "Ay dios mio..."
JoeMomma29
JoeMomma29 - 6/29/2013, 3:37 PM
Hey Hey!

I am Hispanic and I know what you mean!!!!

LOL @ "Ay dios mio"

JoeMomma29
JoeMomma29 - 6/29/2013, 3:39 PM
Please let the rumors be true, Bring Aquaman to the big screen!

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