What’s to say about Watchmen? Who watches the Watchmen? Do we? Does some force so much more powerful than us watch them? Nobody knows… This review is about (as I stated above) the directors cut of my favorite comic book movie: Watchmen. Running at 3 hours and 6 minutes (perfect time for a film/comic like this), this movie is directed by Zack Synder. I did watch the original version (in IMAX too), which I awarded with 3 and a half stars out of 4. Now hang on… Yes, I did give that same score to G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra, but in no way can G.I. Joe even compare to the original cut of the movie. But G.I. Joe didn’t deserve 3 stars from me, and Watchmen didn’t deserve 4. So, please don’t make a fuss out of that. Well, here’s the review.
By my guess, everyone at ComicBookMovie.com has seen this movie and read the spectacular graphic novel by famed comic book writer Alan Moore. I have (10 out of 10 for the graphic novel), and loved it. But, my review is of this movie, not the graphic novel. So, I won’t go into the plot very much. Let’s start with the actors. Phenomenal. That’s the word for them. Billy Crudup (Almost Famous) plays Doctor Manhattan. He is the big, naked, blue guy. He was caught in an intrinsic field generator and turned into something beyond human. He became a superman (or a god). He can see into the future, and manipulate almost anything. Jeffrey Dean Morgan plays the Comedian. He’s a guy who laughs at society. He thinks were all a joke. He knows that were dooming ourselves into complete and utter destruction. But why should he do anything about it? Because there really is nothing he (or we) can do about it. Malin Akerman plays Silk Spectre II. The one in leather that you guys can’t keep your eyes off. Her mom was a superhero, and wanted her to be one too. So, now she is one. That’s really all to say about her. Oh, she’s dating the blue guy Manhattan. But, he doesn’t care for her too much. Matthew Goode plays Ozymandias. The smartest MAN on the PLANET! He became rich from nothing; he did this by admiring Alexander the Great. He’s your basic good guy: wants peace, love, and happiness. Patrick Wilson plays Nite-Owl II. His role model was his hero. So he became his role model. He liked flying, and so he became the second Nite-Owl! But he’s got his problems too, I mean we all do. He’s a regular joe like us. Only we don’t fight crime in our underwear at 3 in the morning. Finally, Jackie Earle Haley [The Bad News Bears (1976), he played the motorcycle riding Kelly Leak], is Rorschach, our favorite character. Now, he’s got problems. He likes justice for all, so he beats the crap out of those scum on the street who find justice by hurting people. He’s your average vigilante; he even kills every now and then. He wears a mask that resembles those Rorschach Blot Tests. You know, the ones where the doctor asks, “What do you see here?” and you answer, “Some nice flowers.” This mask resembles that he doesn’t see the world as we do. Some people see the world in gray, some in white, and some in black. But, Rorschach can’t mix his black and white to reveal gray. He constantly is stuck between two worlds. Insanity and reality. But he fights to see how it all works. He knows that the world is dying, only he doesn’t laugh at it, he fights it. He fights for us, but we call him a criminal. Mankind, were just crazy aren’t we? Hope I didn’t just offend anyone there just now. Jackie Earle Haley deserves best actor for his role. Will he get it? Nope (though, Angelina Jolie was nominated for her amazing role in Changeling, which received mixed reviews like Watchmen, so you never know). The actors were all cast perfectly. Everyone plays a good role, and I mean EVERYONE.
The story is how you all know it. The year is 1985, superheroes exist. Nixon is still President (WHY? Why would we do something like that?), we won Vietnam (sorry… we refers to America, I live in the U.S., so I’m just used to saying it like that), and we are on the verge of nuclear war. Now there was one thing I didn’t like about Watchmen, but the extra 24 minutes in the director’s cut beat that thing. The thing was: Instead of being call “The Crimebusters,” a team of superheroes (the main characters) were called “The Watchmen.” Now I know this was done for the people who haven’t read the book. But, the graphic novel was called “Watchmen,” because of this phrase: Quis custodiet, ipsoses custodes. That’s Latin for “Who watches the Watchmen.” That’s what the title means. Who watches the people (or superheroes) who watch over us? WHO!? That’s what the title meant, and that’s why the movie lost a half a star. A pretty bad reason to whine about, well I think its important to know what the title means. But, I’m not gonna get into that, I’m already on my second page. The plot was excellent. Followed the comic book very well. Well, except for the squid (but that’s ok). If you haven’t seen this movie, then why would you read this review?
The effects and fights (more in this version) were spectacular. Synder is good with action. He did it good in 300 (despite the fact that I didn’t like the movie, the graphic novel by Frank Miller was also only “Ok”), and Dawn of the Dead (liked that one). He made the fights scenes pretty realistic, and well choreographed. The exploding bodies were cool (and gruesome). So, the effects were great.
This version contains a good amount of extra footage. From Hollis Mason’s death to Nite-Owl beating the crap out of a knot-top after he learned the knot-tops killed Mason. Good footage. Not worth a buy (save your money for the extended cut with Black Freighter intertwined, out in December), but definitely worth a rental. Sure, the movies long, but come-on… a graphic novel like this (some 400 pages long) could be up to 5 hours long. But, it was done in 3. Still spectacular…
Well, know for the final score. My favorite is Rorschach. Haley had a sense about him, he could be as crazy as Rorschach is, and as real as he is. He deserves best actor. He really does. This film was fantastic, the best parts are: The Mars part, the final battle, the whole movie, the flashbacks, the jail part, and the beginning part. Oh, and yes (in case you didn’t know), there really is a smiley face crater on Mars. This movie is awarded 4 out of 4 stars. Hope you guys enjoyed this review.
4 out of 4 stars
-TheCritic17-