Dragonball: The Trainwreck We All See Coming

Dragonball: The Trainwreck We All See Coming

We all see this movie bombing horribly, so here's to the death of a manga classic.

Editorial Opinion
By Caboose - Dec 09, 2008 12:12 AM EST
Filed Under: Dragonball Evolution

Ok, there are so many things wrong with this movie it's hard to find a place to start. Created by Akira Toriyama and running in the Shonen Jump magazine from 1984 to 1995, Dragonball is one of Japan's most successful and influential manga comic strips ever created. Now I've read the Dragonball manga and I've even watched the anime series as well (excluding Dragonball GT!) so when I first heard they were making a Dragonball movie I was a little bit intrigued, my initial response was if this movie is done right it could be successful and alot of fun. I do try to keep an open mind and give these movies a fighting chance. However, once I read the cast list and saw the first trailer, my mind was made up: This movie is going to bomb...hard! I find it interesting that this movie bares almost no resemblance to the manga...or the anime, it's not even an amalgamation of the two. It's like they just took the name and created a whole new, exciting, craptastic story just for the movie. An albino Piccolo played by Spike from Buffy The Vampire Slayer, Master Roshi played by the guy from Bulletproof Monk and Goku, now an emo high school kid whose only spiritual power seems to be the ability to dress like an Abercrombie model. Seriously, who thought this was a good idea? Then I saw the studio backing the movie...Fox, well that explains everything. Fox has, over the years, become the slayer of comic book movies including Daredevil and has now apparently decided that destroying American pop culture is not enough. It truly saddens me that this movie will be laughed out of theaters because the books were really good, but the truth is Dragonball will join the ever growing list of movies that should've never been made. And then there was the leaked image of the Goku/lizard/man thing that Fox demanded everyone take down. To be honest, if my movie had make up effects that looked like they had been done by a middle school art class I would want those pics taken down too. Not to mention that Saiyans transform into giant apes...not into dinosaur lizard men. This film looks more like a Dragonball spoof than a serious action flick, the cast is mediocre and the director has clearly not read any of the manga or he would see just how big a travesty this movie is actually becoming. Piccolo looks like an extra from a Buffy episode, Goku's origin is completely wrong, there's no Krillin, Bulma/Chi Chi/Yamcha and Roshi have all had their characters mangled beyond recognition and thus the film moves forward. I don't even want to hear that all these "artistic changes" are just to "modernize" the stories for a new generation. These books and stories are classics and their tales became favorites for a reason: because they are fantastic the way they are! There are no changes needed to be made. As soon as the word change appears you wind up with a movie that bears no resemblance whatsoever to the source material it was created from. Chaos ensues, fans are pissed, movies bomb, fanchises are detroyed and the cycle repeats with another unsuspecting victim. So far the only group of people that have gotten a successful formula for creating decent movies is the Marvel Studio guys, with successes like Iron Man and The Incredible Hulk, Marvel has shown it is tired of big name studios trashing it's big name properties. DC has yet to follow suit and we can all see what is happening with Dragonball. This movie will plague theaters next summer and Dragaonball fans everywhere are going to leave the theater scratching their heads and demanding their money back. Lead actor Justin Chatwin had better enjoy his experience as a lead actor because after this movie it's probably never going to happen again. Chow Yun Fat had better have a good back up plan for getting his career back on track and James Marsters will have to find another vampire TV show to get his rep back. Yeah...albino Piccolo with a English accent...God kill me now. Well, I'm sure there are plenty of you who disagree and for those people I say go read the books and tell me afterwards if you still think this movie will be any good. After it's release it's going to be a long while before we can all erase the mental stain this movie will leave on us all.

Caboose out!


Pics from Wikipedia.org and Comicbookmovie.com
Dragonball created by Akira Toriyama

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lazyday2008
lazyday2008 - 12/10/2008, 10:43 PM
so true...i hope next time they get it right...dbz taught me how to be tougher than nails son....
Remy83
Remy83 - 12/11/2008, 2:35 AM
dude i couldn't agree more with you. Every time i see new pics or trailers for the movie it bugs the holy hell out of me. Fox really needs to get their hands out of the "G33K Cookie Jar" and go back to making films about aliens and S**T.
HR
HR - 12/11/2008, 7:30 AM
bravo my friend, very well put. I agree completely.
If your going to moderniz a movie do it the right way.
NoobMike
NoobMike - 12/11/2008, 8:57 AM
I really hope this bombs so bad in the box office, hopefully that will make Fox leave manga alone for at least 10 years, and put the Cowboy Bebop project in deep freeze.
IonParallax
IonParallax - 12/12/2008, 7:43 PM
Please Fox, do not murder another franchise. Leave Bebop alone, and stick to movies that AREN'T adaptations of comics, graphic novels, or animated series. Or video games. Just stop already.
Jobe29
Jobe29 - 4/14/2009, 7:16 AM
I think the best advertisement for this movie....should just be the poster of the DragonBalls and nothing else.....that is the only why Hollywood/Fox would make their money back!........DBZ is a franchise that needs the top of the line everything when it comes to filming live action; writers(the originals leading the project),actors,CGI,and lots and lots of money!!!!
drthdrgn24
drthdrgn24 - 7/17/2009, 11:59 AM
I saw this movie and as much as a agree that it did, in fact bomb but it could have been worse. I think that Dragonball and more over Dragonball Z would make great movies IF the right director got the to do it such as Micheal Bay who we all know from the Transformer movies loves his special effects would make these movies the right way. I could see Goku powering up and blow away half a mile of land and it would look great.
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