Old-Skool Masochistic Tendencies or Public Sevice Announcment: Don't Read Mutant X!

So a few weeks back, I got this whim to read the 1998 Mutant X series based on the urge for some early Tom Raney pencils. I was on a mutants binge so I figured hey, why the hell not? I love Havok and this should be entertaining. Oh dear baby Jeebus how wrong did I end up being..


Firstly, Tom Raney didn't even stick around for long. I guess he saw the signs of a sinking ship before many. Secondly, how the HELL did Marvel pay Howard Mackie for this sub-par quality, dribbling garbage? My main problem was with the dialogue. Dear God that terrible, terrible dialogue. Its like Mackie took a page out of Claremont's style of classic expositional writing, but he forgot to add talent and skill. Someone needs to tell this man comic books are a visual medium! The visuals are taken care of by the artists. But NO, he has the compulsion to describe every pathetic little action and movement in his speech bubbles. Here's a great example from the first issue. It's a scene with Bloodstorm, M. Pryor and Havok fighting a sentinel. Madelyne: "Bloodstorm...Ororo, the gale force winds you are summoning up and directing toward this one doesn't seem to be having any more effect then either Havok's or my powers." Not too bad right? Exhibit B, Havok and his adopted son face off against a space craft to which Havok's thought bubbles proclaim: "The Bottom of the ship is glowing. Some sort of energy weapons. Ok...two can play at this game. Time to teach these spacefaring aliens why I am called...HAVOK! See if they're prepared for a super-heated plasma beam aimed at what appears to be their rear stabilisers." and as the ship goes down from the hit, he continues "I guess not!" And it just...gets....worse. It makes you almost question...is Alex Summers some kind of schizophrenic? Was he describing his actions to a dormant personality? Or is this breaking the fourth wall in the worst kind of way?

It doesn't stop there though. Young Scotty Summers, the son of "that world's" Alex Summers and Madelyne Prior gives a shotgun to the chin worthy performance reminiscent of the kid who played young Anikan Skywalker in the first Star War's prequel. "There are BAD things coming! (...) "He's a BAD man!"(ugh)"Daddy, why did mommy do all that BAD stuff?"(ogawd)"Unca Hank, stop raping me in my sleep silly! Yer so green and thorny down there."(i wish).

I can keep going about overly descriptive dialogue (aka "Verbal diarrhoea") cluttered with needless exposition, the painful melodrama and constant angst, the craptastic shock-value name-dropping of characters (as significant as they would have been in the 90s anyway), the retarded (and redundant) re-casting of the Six team with a mutant Captain America and 2 vampires, or how most of the protagonists and antagonists did a role-reversal, but I'll just say this: Mutant X was a way better teaser poster then it was an actual comic book series.