I wrote this one in celebration of the Halloween season! That, and Twilight Zone and Tales from the Crypt are two of my favorite shows haha. Anyway, hope you guys enjoy the battle!
Rod Serling:
Submitted for your approval, a talking corpse who’s about to get owned
Can you please just shut up, you annoying bag of bones?
All your stupid puns are driving all of us mad
Not surprising coming from someone who has a circus freak dad
The stories I present are smart, they make people think
The stories you tell? Well, they just stink
I’m a real life person, you’re just a silly little puppet
So why don’t you go down to Sesame Street, and hang out with the Muppets?
The Crypt Keeper:
Greetings boils and ghouls, it’s your old pal, the Keeper!
Watch as I send this has-been straight to the reaper
My stories are frightening, filled with blood and gore
Your silly little tales are just simply a bore
Who’s the better host here? Just my sight gives people scares!
After I win this battle, I will forever haunt your nightmares
I’ll take you into my crypt, and relax you at the guillotine
I’m positive your head will come off nice and clean
Rod Serling:
Oh sure, you’re a scary host, but when’s the last time you won an Emmy?
At least I don’t look like an undead version of Steve Buscemi
Kiss my ass Crypty, because your mind just got blown
Think twice before ever stepping into the Twilight Zone
The Crypt Keeper:
Hey, I maybe a puppet, but I’m the one here pulling the strings
So go on and bow down to the true horror king
I’ve watched all your works, each one had a crappy script
Now sit down, and let me read you a tale from the crypt
Who won? You decide!