EDITORIAL: Very Mild Super Powers

EDITORIAL: Very Mild Super Powers

Have you ever had one of those experiences where you do something odd, spontaneous or slightly incredible. I'm sure you have. Here I'll discuss a few of these occasions with the help of a song from Irish comedian, David O'Doherty. This is just for laughs...

Editorial Opinion
By NovaCorpsFan - Jul 30, 2013 06:07 PM EST
Filed Under: Other



We've all had moments like that, haven't we? But I'm sure alot of you guys have had much more peculiar experiences than those in the song. Here's a list of my own creation, some of which I have experienced. I'll mark the ones I have with a *

So, away we go...

1. Seeing a snippet of the future in a dream*

Now alot of you will be shocked to know that seeing the future in a dream is shockingly common. I have experienced this very situation many times. And when I say future, I don't mean hovercrafts and stuff. I mean seeing about twenty seconds of your own future. Taking into account that you have thousands of dreams in a night, everyone will have experienced this, but not have any recollection of it.

2. Knowing when an anniversary/birthday is

This mostly applies to dudes, 'cause I've never met a forgetful woman. But to ANY man out there that remembers any sort of anniversary or birthday, you sirs have one helluva gift! I don't know my own parents' birthdays, but my neighbour does. I see him as some sort of super human. That's not all though, my BEST FRIEND, who I no longer live in the same country as, remembers the date he and I met in freakin' nursery (kindergarten).

3: Sitting through Birdemic*

I'm just gonna describe this oscar-worthy film to you guys. So, there's a guy who has a pretty run o' the mill life, which is shown by ten minutes of his car driving to work. He meets a hot girl, they exchange flirtacious lines then bang. But when they wake up, there's birds flying into buildings and exploding... I'll leave it at that 'cause it's enough to consider sitting through it a super power.

4. Knowing why a spouse is angry

Once again, this applies, partially to men, but if a dude is difficult then this applies to the women dealing with him. Now, I'll be honest I have no idea what goes on in a woman's head, but bravo if you THINK you do. I've talked to girls I know about this and if you THINK you know what goes through a woman's mind, you are so wrong! To most men this is common knowledge, but if it isn't, then it's game over for you, pal!
And ladies, if you're boyfriend shows any of the following qualities; dump him
- Not talking after you use something of his
- Expressing gratitude with sex
- Texting the letter "k" after you send him a long and heartfelt message
The men might find that funnier than the women, but hey we're here to laugh.

5. Doing that thing women do with towels to keep their hair dry

Three twists then throw it back, right? No matter how you try it, guys, it'll never work. A friend and I spent a sugar high trying and neither of us succeeded.

6. Knowing a WiFi code off by heart

My sister possesses this particular gift and it never ceases to amaze me.

7.Understanding Inception

Pretty self-explanatory.

8. Knowing someone's nationality based off their face*

I dunno if anyone else has had this but yeah, I can guess someone's nationality by looking at their face. When it comes to alot of Europeans though, I just say European.

9. Spotting money on the floor from a distance*

Who hasn't had this? We've all been wandering down the street and suddenly we spot something out the corner of our eye. We backtrack, and even if it's a cent o pence or whatever, we still pick it up.

10. Predicting the total number of a list*
I'm sure you've all had this at some stage, maybe even recently?

Well, that's my list of Very Mild Super Powers. Leave a comment if you had a laugh outta this and, hey, I might make some more satirical editorials. Tell me about your own "super powers" in the comments.
That's all for now folks, buh-bye.
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MrCameron
MrCameron - 7/30/2013, 6:48 PM
@ Morrow

Fun read.

But seriously, I've experienced #1 A LOT. I mean, I'll have a dream where something minor in my life happens and I forget about it but when it actually does happen IRL, I'm like "Whoa WTF?"

Need. Scientific. Explanation.
SomTingWong
SomTingWong - 7/30/2013, 8:02 PM
Ha ha. That was very entertaining and funny. Front page worthy!
SauronsBANE
SauronsBANE - 7/30/2013, 8:32 PM
Not to get too science-y here, but #1 is easily explained. It's called deja-vu, and I've experienced it countless times as well. I forget exactly the reason, but thanks to the crossing of some wires in the brain, it mistakes those moments as "memories" or "dreams" when they really aren't. When the moment occurs, it definitely FEELS like you've dreamed about it before, but that sensation is false. It's definitely unnerving, but easily explained!
SauronsBANE
SauronsBANE - 7/30/2013, 8:34 PM
Also, it took me a few tries but Inception was awesome when I finally understood it. Great, fun article though!
PsychoManiacJacky
PsychoManiacJacky - 7/30/2013, 9:04 PM


That was an amazing read, I cry so hard. Number 7 is so true, after so much time I finally have come in terms with Inception and what it means in life, to be faced with a destiny or reality your not normally used to facing. To go beyond your own limits and seek what is not asked of you but to seek what your mind sets out for you.
comiccow6
comiccow6 - 7/31/2013, 10:37 AM
^^ If Jacky understands Inception, than Inception is now complete bullshit
acidbath
acidbath - 7/31/2013, 5:01 PM
my super power is herpes (=
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