SPIDER-MAN: Donald Glover To Star In A Movie Based On... The Hypno-Hustler!

@dracula - for real! Like, why isn’t this a Prowler movie?

@KWilly - Well, yes, clearly the hierarchy of the SPUMC is about to change. Here's what I think really happened, although I have absolutely NO evidence other than what I've read on conspiracy websites and those cryptic little messages that I keep finding inside my fortune cookies (I know that they're trying to tell me SOMETHING, I just haven't figured it all yet - like, what do you mean "lucky numbers?!?):

Glover was probably paying close attention to what the Rock was planning to do with his obscure character (to the GA anyway), and thought "Hell, if The Rock can remake the DCEU in his image with a character like that, then I should be able to do the same thing with the SPUMC.". So Glover probably did a bunch a research, read a lot of (what was his name again? Oh, yeah, the Hypno-Hustler) comics, of which there are I'm sure a real treasure trove, then pitched his idea to Sony on how his character (at first a villain but then becomes an anti-hero) can reshape the SPUMC, and the Sony execs loved it. LOVED IT. Finally a focal point for the not-so-great attempt at a shared universe and everything was locked in.

So one night a month or two ago, after the deal was signed, Glover and his friends went out to celebrate his new gig as the new face of the SPUMC. After one too many shots he went to use the bathroom, slipped on the wet floor, and hit his head on the handle, then the top of the urinal, then again on the Botton of the urinal before hitting his head on the floor. He was rushed to the local hospital, but slipped into a coma, which He just came out of and after seeing the BO and critical results of "Black Adam", along with everything else going on at DC, snapped back into reality and got his agent on the phone asking "Oh shit os shit oh shit what did I do? No, cancel that shit right now! I don't care if I signed a contract with Sony! Cancel that shit! Cancel it!!!".

But, alas, he couldn't cancel it, and now will be forced to hype it for the next couple of years, which I imagine is going to go something like this: "It's, um, going, to, um, (do I really have to say this?) redefine the hierarchy of the SPUMC, as we see (what's his name again? Oh, right) Hypno-Hustler (Oh Jesus) face his greatest challenges in the form of, uh, El Diablo or El Muerto or El Mariachi or something and, of course, Morbius. Oh Christ just kill me now..."

@Origame - It's less people being upset over whatever it is you're trying to get at and more Sony, once again, scrapping the bottom of the barrel for another Spidey villain movie no one asked for.

@Santanaonfire - you da man! I’m working off my phone so I can’t add gifs haha