10 Ways Gambit Could Get His Groove On With Rogue
Gambit has always been a character I´ve liked. He´s smart, his powers cool, and more than anything he´s got style. His romance, or lack there of with Rogue, has been one of the sweetest, comic, tragic, and heart warming story arches that has run through the X-Men series.
But I´m sorry to be cynical about this whole scenario, it just seems to me for such a seasoned player our sly old Cajun hasn´t really thought this one through. From everything I know of the X-Men Universe there has been nothing stopping old Gambit from knocking boots with our fair Southern Bell.
Here are the top 10 ways Rogue could finally get laid.
This is CMB website so I expect everyone to know the reason why Rogue and Gambit can´t get it on; but just in case there is an explaination at the bottom of the article.
I mean seriously would you let anything get in the way of you hitting that.
So here are My Top 10 Ways Gambit Could Make A Woman Of Rogue:
Just to start off with, in all these scenario´s Gambit´s best of Sean Paul CD is playing in the background.
10)Anne Summers Style
With all the sexy latex fetish gear the ladies of the X world wear (Psy-Lock, White Queen), are you trying to tell me there isn´t at least one Anne Summers in the X-Men Universe?! I mean if Miz Marvel didn´t get her suit from the exotic lingerie section of an Adult sex shop, then I don´t know what´s going on.
Gambits Gamble:
There´s bound to be some devices he could steal from Anne Summers, being a mutant master thief and all. All he needs then is to have Rogue feel him up with the gloves on, while he goes to work on her with some high quality Made In Taiwan Technology.
Gambits Risk:
I´ve heard some of those devices can be really good. Rogue might just realize she doesn´t need poor old Gambit, or any other man for that matter, after feeling the strong sensuous stimulating touch of The Rabbit 1000.
Gambits Lesson:
When biology fails you, never underestimate the ingenuity of modern technology.
9)Danger Room Style
Now is it me or did the danger room seem like it could function for quite a few other extracurricular activities? I mean those weapons seemed pretty real to me, as did the holographic mutants in the simulations.
Gambits Gamble:
Gambit takes Rogue to the danger room, where he makes sweet love to a holographic version of Rogue. Rogue in the mean while lustfully watches from the control room. Blushing from what the Cajun is doing to her. With her behind the controls she can turn the danger level up and down as much as she wants to, leaving Gambit completely at her mercy.
I think you get the point, without me spelling it out. Plus Best Of Sean Paul is in the background. :)
Gambits Risk: She may just slap him for even suggesting it.
Gambits Lesson:
Don´t ask a woman if you can make love to a hologram of her, as she watches; no matter how good it sounds in your head.
8)Ask Trask For A Favor Style
Trask, the rightwing anti-mutant militant, once got hold of a little neck gizmo, which suppressed the mutant gene, relieving mutants of their powers.
Gambits Gamble:
Gambit goes to Trask promising to set up the X-Men if he allows him to borrow the neck gizmo for one night. A life time of guilt over betrayal of his buddies for one evening of glory with Rogue. I´d choose one evening of glory with Rogue personally.
Gambits Risk:
Because Trask doesn´t trust the Mutie´s, he will probably double cross him way before he´s supposed to, revealing Gambit as the traitor. Meaning Rogue will go on to hate him forever. (Still worth it though) ☺
Gambits Lesson:
Don´t ever, and I really mean ever, negotiate with terrorists.
7)Vacation In The Savage Land: Doing It Tarzan And Jane Style
In the X-Men universe, there is a hidden jungle in Antartica, one that man knows nothing about. Apparently, there is a field of energy pervading areas of the Savage Land that suppresses mutant abilities.
Gambits Gamble:
Gambit takes Rogue on a purely romantic trip to the Savage Land. Romances her in the tropical landscape till she´s fly on air (figuratively), and as night time falls, builds a tent, putting the moves on her as cuddle up to bed.
Gambits Risk:
Not the most romantic holiday destination. I also here the cuisine is awful. Plus all the natives act like complete savages.
Gambits Lesson:
Rain Forests in the Antartica. Don´t believe everything your travel agent tells you. When something sounds too good to be true it probably is.
6) A condom and little hole in the sheets for Mini-Gambit style
Simple really, a thin sheet and some common sense and Remi could have been making sweet love to Rogue for some time now.
Gambits Gamble: This condom will never break.
Gambits Risk:
In the heat of passion a number of things could go wrong in this scenario. One could get too excited, and, make a wrong move in the heat of passion.
Gambits Lesson
Better use the ultra thick condoms mate, less sensation, but trust me you don´t want to feel the full blast of sensations with Rogue.
5) Kidnap Leech For The Night Style
Leech a member of the Morlocks has the power to suppress the mutant powers of mutants in his vicinity.
Gambits Gamble:
Gambit sneaks into the Morlocks hide out in the dead of night, he steals Leech and ties him up, then escapes back to the mansion. Tying Leech up and hiding him in the closet, Gambit wakes Rogue up with a kiss. Overwhelmed by the touch of a man, she just goes with it.
Gambits Risk:
If Leech escapes mid coitus, it could get really messy for old Gambit.
Gambits Lesson:
Rogue just can´t do it knowing that things listening. She´s a lady after all.
4) Pay A Mediating Telepath Style
On Valentines day, Gambit pays a well known shady and powerful telepath, to connect his and Rogues mind in a beech, where they are able to do anything they want.
Gambits Gamble:
The telepath may have their own agenda, having two of the X-MENS best in such a vulnerable situation, may prove too tempting an opportunity to take advantage of, for our psychic Cupid.
Gambits Risk:
Letting some stranger into his head, he´s never let himself be this vulnerable before.
But hey, love can do strange things to a man.
Gambits Lesson
Never let your guard down, unless its for sex with Rogue. (Wait what´s the lesson again?)
3) Pay A Mediating Telepath 2: Psy-lock Threesome Style
Now, Gambit having got Psy-Lock and Rogue a bit tipsy, starts using his Mutant ability to subtly hypnotize and charm those around him. He comes up with a novel idea to experience one night of total abandon. Psy-Lock still reeling over Scott getting back with Jean decides for one night and one night only she´ll oblige the Cajun Scoundrel. Can anyone say psychic 3 way.
Gambits Gamble:
That his hypnotic charm is more powerful than Psy-Lock´s telepathic abilities. They weren´t but she doesn´t care anyway; she´s always had a thing for those she can´t have.
Gambits Risk
It was supposed to be a threesome, but it seems like Psy-locks a bit more into Rogue. So much so, at some point she even blocks Gambit out of the nights entertainment.
Gambits Lesson
What lesson, he just had a threeway with Psy-lock and Rogue. Only lesson he´s learned is he´s motherf%/&%&/king P:I:M:P: genius.
2) “Keep your trousers on love! ” Style
Well it always occurred to me Rogue could always just keep her trousers on, if some well placed cuts were made in them.
Gambits Gamble
She´s willing to actually make cuts in her really sexy X-Men outfits.
Gambits Risk
She´ll in all likelihood only be willing to try this method with Jogger bottoms or her least sexy gear. I mean she wouldn´t want to ruin any of her favorite X-Men outfits.
Gambits Lesson
Don´t underestimate a woman´s passion for her clothes. Doesn´t matter though our man Gambit doesn´t care what she´s wearing. :)
1) And the number one way is ------
Let you guys choose, and I´ll pick the best answer.
Oh but an honorary mention for life ´s too short, try it any way style.
Just to say due to my passion for a Wonder Woman movie I´ve been writing a lot of pro feminist articles, which is nothing to feel ashamed of, but today I feel like letting my inner misogynist out of the politically correct straight jacket I´ve had him in recently. Just a little celebration of my masculinity and a bit of fun.
Rogue and Gambit´s Problem
If anyone doesn´t know (how? This is a CBM website, but just incase) Gambit loves to tease Rogue, insinuating or hinting at all sorts of romantic liaisons and scenarios between the two. In the best runs of this story, we see Rogue getting really annoyed by Gambits, cheeky suggestions, while obviously having been charmed and having affection for this impudent Romeo. While at the same time behind Gambit´s tongue in cheek pick up lines and charming skullduggery lies a real love for Rogue.
So what´s the problem? Rogue due to her mutant ability cannot touch another human-being, lest she renders them unconscious in the process absorbing their mutant power. This has prevented the two consummating their obvious affection for one another.