When it was announced that Universal was milking, finishing off, disrespect, reboot the Jurassic Park franchise, I was skeptical at best. Like most movies I'm skeptical on, I tend to reserve final judgement until I see the film. While I tried my best to appreciate
Jurassic World as a great new entry in the franchise, my genuine assessment is that the film does nothing new on a deeper level then flashy visuals and one-note jokes. Like your moms new boyfriend,
Jurassic World wears thin fast.
Before I dive into the cons of this film, let me first say that I enjoyed the overall themes and tone of the film. I mean, it's a Jurassic Park movie. So all the themes of not hampering with nature are all here. This isn't really, nor should it be, a surprise. This is a film about dinosaurs being back brought back to life after all.
The CGI too deserves a mention. It's not terrible.
Too bad, that these two things are all held back by a nearly atrocious script. The lines, general story, motivations for character...all are incredibly terrible and inconsistent. The film is a jarring mess of characterization. Take for instance Irrfan Khan's Simon Masrani. During the film it's told that he spent a large fortune turning John Hammond's dream into a reality. Only then to complain about finances later on in the film. He goes from someone who 'spares no expense' to someone who's worried about his money. It just doesn't add up. On the plot end of things, the film has some great CGI and action set pieces. Problem is, how it gets to those moments feels forced and unnatural.
Many of the other story elements don't make sense. Vincent D’Onofrio is in the film, and essentially is a villain for the sake of the plot. His whole deal is that he wants to...wait for it...he wants to use Raptors as soldiers. Yeah. Don't you think that the film could muster something better then 'military guy that wants to militarize ______"?
The worst part of this movie (barely beating out 'guy who wants to turn raptors into soldiers') is the Indominus Rex (I-Rex). Or as I like to call it,
‘Dino Ex Machina’. Basically, this dinosaur can do WHATEVER the plot wants him do do. Need him to climb a wall? He's smart enough to do it. Want him to claw out a tracker? Smart enough to do that. What's worse is, when the movie needs shit to hit the fan, there's the I-Rex to smash and destroy things. It's obnoxious how much the plot hinges on this dinosaur as really, it's not exciting enough to stand on it's own.
The biggest problem with this movie is how nostalgic it tries to be while doing its own thing. On a certain level I can respect that. However, the film never really knows what to do with the creative liberties it's given outside of the pre-existing nostalgia. If you were to take away all references and branding tying this to the Jurassic Park franchise, and you'd be left with a terrible film. I'm not judging this as a Jurassic Park film, I'm judging it as a film; and when I do that I realize just how terrible it is.
Overall: 1 Uncle Joey out of 1,000,000