You know, there is one thing that
Captain America is filled with and it isn't apple pie or a highly experimental drug that enhances human beings. Actually, scratch that last bit. No, what he is actually filled with is regret for not making his moves with Peggy Carter way back in the day and now he's stuck with her cuter niece! Wait, what? Where was I going with this? Oh yeah! Regret! You don't wanna miss your perfect moment...if only to keep the Scarlet Witch out of your head. She'll play on that kind of insecurity, you know?
To celebrate both the birth of the United States of America and quick decision making(I wonder if they are related?), we here at SuperHeroStuff are hosting a flash sale for Marvel's First Avenger! We've just started this sale so hopefully you've heard the metaphorical 'internet-shot-heard-round-the-world'. Utilizing code MERICA, you can knock off 20% of ANY Captain America item. That includes shirts, hoodies, beanies, pint glasses, plushies, POP Funs, magnets, buttons, lunchboxes, backpacks, and whatever else everybody's favorite Super Soldier can be found on. Say, I wonder if the Winter Soldier wears a pair of Captain America underwear?
Lasting only 24 hours, you'll need to act fast. No phoning in people and being like 'I'm gunna be late for that dance' or some jazz like that. If you want Captain America then you need to hustle on over to SuperheroStuff! You never know when the Red Skull or Robert Redford are going to initiate some plan and mess everything up. Get don't get lapped like Anthony Mackie and hurry up!