Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice - Taking Down Dead Horse Beater

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice - Taking Down Dead Horse Beater

My third response article! This one is filled with much more satire yet also much more sense! Oh, and I hope you'll find out why a lot of criticism against Batman v Superman is unwarranted.

Editorial Opinion
By YafiszKhan - Dec 04, 2015 04:12 PM EST
Filed Under: DC Comics
So the third stupid pig from WhatCulture has stricken, my arch nemesis - Alex Leadbeater. I am not just going to stomp on this idiot. I'm going to do so much more.
 
My previous two articles had also been bashing WhatCulture articles that for no reason bashed Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice. So what does WhatCulture do? They release this piece of shit article. Try and read it, I dare you, that article could turn you into Gusto. Now, first time I tried responding to this dumbass I made a Facebook and started commenting on WhatCulture. What do they do? They delete my comments. Censorship I say! Censorship! That's like Josh Wilding deleting every comment Nomis makes!

Now Leadbeater says that this film could change cinema due to marketing. That could be true and I will give it to you Leadbeater, you make a very good point. Then you talk about how nothing on screen has won you over. Do you remember who you are? You are the guy who declared Jared Leto's Joker would be the worst one from a picture. A [frick]ing picture. Then you did the same thing with Aquaman, Wonder Woman and Batman. From pictures you stated they would suck! From [frick]ing pictures you acted like you'd seen the whole movie and were trying to warn us.

You say that a trailer made the movie go from being the most hyped to the most derided. Who are you speaking for? I'll post the comments on your article. You aren't talking about the people who are reading your article, thats' for damn sure.
It quashed all hype with a laser blast? If that were true, wouldn’t that be the only point in this shitty piece of reading you think is an article? You say you don’t want this movie to be bad. Well then why did you decide it would be when Zack Snyder announced the movie? No. Why did you decide it would be when there was some CGI and explosions in Man of Steel?

Honorable Mention – Hyperactive Lex

Just a bit of advice, Leadbeater, the movie is called Batman v Superman not Batman V Superman. You and other “journalists” need to get that in your head, how to type that is. Now, Leadbeater, you are from the UK so rivalling is the right from. However, in Britain, honorable is spelled honourable. Have some continuity in your writing, please. Backlash has not been unrelenting and definitely not to the level of Ben Affleck’s casting. Yes, quotes and images have swayed people if you cared to see what people actually thought before writing. You want something classical instead of something new? Go rewatch Christopher Reeve’s Superman films then.

It’s Quite Simply [a]n Awful Trailer

What is it with WhatCulture idiots and capitalizing letters on the wrong words? You call the ComicCon trailer effective, say you don’t like but admit that it is more down to the nature of the film? How do you know the nature of the film? Have you seen more it than we have that you can correctly tell us what the nature of the film is? Unconditionally sold Bat-fans are getting worried? That statement works against itself. If they were unconditionally sold, they still are. I agree, the editing of the trailer is a bit messy if you look at in a classical standpoint. However, if you look at the trailer as working with the music it is going with, it works very well.

You talk about how they are edited just to show narrative. You realize every Star Wars trailer has been like that. Every Marvel trailer. Wait. Just about every other trailer. If they gave you the actual narrative of the movie, they would spoil it and you would bitch about that. It’s not any more disorienting as it is any other trailer, except that you want it to be. Does it make the film more exciting, because contrary to what you think Leadbeater, it works, you bitch.
 
The Dialogue [a]ll Sounds REALLY Self-Aware
 
You mean it sounds meta and that the film has a metafictional approach. This may surprise you Leadbeater, but metafiction is in fact very, very common and has been prevalent for more than a century now. This dialogue is not even that meta, I’ve heard more meta things from Marvel trailers and The Martian trailer and in all instances, it was not bad. You keep writing ‘Urgh’. You don’t actually have to write ‘Urgh’ a million times if you want us to believe you don’t want to like the movie.

Jokes [o]n You – There’s Humour
 
You talk about a report which you believed so whole-heartedly about DC Films not being allowed to do any jokes, despite it not being true, that you bitched about it as you do. It had been proven false several times. Given how this world has been set up. Watch Man of Steel again, plenty of jokes. Watch The Dark Knight Rises again, plenty of jokes. Watch The Dark Knight again, plenty of jokes. These films have never been without jokes. You say it furthers the thinking that Warner Bros haven’t decided on the tone when just a little bit ago Charles Roven revealed that they had. How do you think? Please, tell me? Do you go into an article hoping to write the worst things possible in a shitty way? Do you consider yourself a good writer? If you do, please stop.
 
Dumbsday
 
Cool play on words Alex! You’re totally a legitimate writer! No, you’re not and it was a horrible play on words. Hell, I can’t figure out what is worse. Your opinion of what DC Films are, or your writing. Yeah, I agree, Doomsday looks like a Cave Troll. He looks like Abomination. You know what though? Do you know what Doomsday is? Essentially a grey version of the Hulk with no Bruce Banner and bony protrusions. Doomsday looks dumb – I don’t know about you but I don’t usually expect Doomsday to look like he’s about to win a Nobel Prize in chemistry.

Oh Alex, sub-plot? I already explained in my response to your fellow writer about plots. Don’t go around using words you do not know how to use. Doomsday isn’t a subplot, it is part of the plot. This is like saying the future sequences in X-Men: Days of Future Past were a subplot. No, they were the plot. Charles Xavier regaining hope was a character arc. A subplot would be the Rogue sequence they deleted. Please Alex, go back to high school and learn those English literature terms you should have learned. For the sake of WhatCulture if not me.
 
Recreating Man [o]f Steel
 
The box office of Man of Steel was fine enough? It grossed more money than you are worth Leadbeater and yes, people are worth currency to their nation. However, I do not want to get into politics with you because I can only imagine how you’d bitch about that. We’re going to see much of their fight? We’re going to see some of their fight from Bruce Wayne’s perspective. Why do you act like seeing a trailer has given you a telepathic bond with the film? Why do you act like you know more than you do?

I don’t drink, but I imagine I’d get pretty drunk if I hung out with this guy and took a shot every time he said “urgh”. Destruction porn action. What does this guy only like shit if it’s made by Stanley Kubrick? Guess what. There was action! Guess what. The action was good. Guess what. You can’t write an article.
 
The Religious Parallels [a]re Back
 
Alex, you come from a Christian background and likely from a very Christian environment. I’m a Muslim who grew up around other Muslims. I don’t believe in Christianity. Christianity to me were the kids in school who would invite me to their church. Guess what. I’m not a Christian and yet the Christ parallels did not bother me one bit at all in Man of Steel.

What point are you trying to make here? First you say that Superman will always be the generic hero. But then you say that Snyder can’t find it in him to let that happen? Then you say maybe he’s not the Christian God so is there a point to this? I’m speaking about this point in general. However, is there a point to your article, or any of your articles… or you writing in general?
 
Sigh, [i]t [i]s Just Super Friends

What did you expect? Did you want the physical fight between the two to be the entire point of the movie? If so you are a bigger dumbass than I thought, and you are already a huge one in my opinion. Let me tell you something else you should have learned in high school. It is called theme. Thematically the idea of Batman versus Superman will reverberate throughout the whole point. It is a thematic point that their ideals and approach are different. Yes, they team up to show us that ideals do not need to separate people but there will be a schism between them and – oh wait, why am I trying to explain something to you that is too smart for you?

The Marketing [i]s Changing Tact Already
 
Ignoring the V because it makes no sense. Well it’s a good thing the v is a lowercase, but I mean, you guys at WhatCulture have some fetish with upper case so whatever floats your boat. You say Warner Bros desperately threw in half the Justice League? Where do you get that idea from? Where is your source? Next time you type something stupid like that, back it up. They are altering it so that it becomes a trinity piece? Wonder Woman had always been advertised for the film. Promotional pictures with her, Batman and Superman have already been released. If they are changing tact now, it means you must be living in the past because that has been a tactic for a while now.

Then he types this “for those who didn’t even realise the movies was coming out”. See something wrong there?

You would wager? Well clearly what you would wager means shit. How much would you wager Alex? That’s the point of a wager. How much would you wager? The film they’ve made. The film isn’t even finished being made. It may surprise you, but almost everyone who knows of this movie is excited.

Comments on Leadbeater’s Article (I’m preserving them here because WhatCulture has a tendency to delete comments):
  • “I only came here to read the comments of people bashing you for making the 4th article blasting the trailer.” – Mike Boccelli
  • “i didn't even read it. I come for the comments as well. i love to hear you guys blast Alex. He's just the worst.” – Shaun M.F. Booker
  • “Ugh you and Simon...just get a room already.” – Alex Colon
  • “Yup, the hatred against this movie its obvious on here, it's a shame” – Cesar Limon
  • “I just came here for the comments. They are usually much better than the articles here.” – EJ Moreno
  • “Alex "Clickbait" Leadbeater.” – Lee Foster
  • “Maybe you Whatculture douche bags should have a pow-wow together and write 1 article of complete bull#*!% instead of having a different one everyday by a different "author" who most likely plagirised it from somewhere else. Why do I even bother coming back here?” – David Lascano (you come back for the comments David).
  • “It really couldn't be any more clear that they would team up by the end.” – Mike Canfield
  • “Can we just have one positive article about the trailer please, there has to be one person on the site who enjoyed it, I mean it wasn't anything amazing but neither was the trailer for Civil War and that got positive articles” – Braden Gunn (do it Josh, he speaks to you!)
  • “What do you like about movies? I thought the trailer was awesome. I thought Clark Kent meeting Bruce Wayne was awesome. I thought wonder women was awesome. I thought Batman's voice was awesome. Simply, I thought everything was awesome.” – Kevin Taylor
  • “Marveltards...Marveltards everywhere.” – Shahriar Bagheri
  • “This was dumb & whiney.” – Jeffery Benedict
  • “Who wrote this article? It sounds like a first year journalism student trying to sound intelligent.” – Ralph Hughes (I know right!)
  • “I think someone mentioned it earlier, why do you even bother writing anymore? You have no credibility and nobody takes you seriously.” – David McElroy
  • “Hahahahaha. Oh you're serious” – Jacob McMillan
  • “thats it.now until i see bvs in theatre i am only opning yhe wwe section of this marvel pretentious dick sucking site” – Yashasvi Pant
  • “Do you guys get paid by Marvel or something? It's pathetic how many negative articles there have been about this film. Give it a rest!” – Nick Charlick
  • “I am pretty sure Marvel does not want idiots as their fanboys.” – George Havvas
  • “Another Bloody bashing. What the hell is going on ??” – Thomas Walsh
  • “Seriously? Another article trashing BvS? What a surprise... Like many others, I just came to read the comments, but on second though... we shouldn't... We are giving Alex the clicks that he wants...” – Ricardo Javier Luna Suarez (let him have them Ricardo, we can’t be too mean)
  • “I can't help but notice that those writers on this site who spend their efforts on critisizing others...can't proof read their own stuff. Nor can anyone else who works here.

    It's quite embarassing gang. Your site lives on words, and you have so much trouble stringing them together.” – John Beneteau (So true!)
  • “will you just stop.. Your hatred is not even funny anymore... Either whatculture is in serious need for writers or they dont read what you write.” – Ridhi Verma
  • “Their* First page, bottom sentence.” – Misho Garcia
Well guys, what do you think of Alex Deadhorsebeater’s article? What do you think of mine? Do you think the comments on his article accurately represent his article? I sure do you. Do you agree with me or him? Leave your comments below!
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CombatWombat
CombatWombat - 12/4/2015, 6:14 PM
WhatCulture requires its writers to capitalize letters the way they do. Them's the rules.
Pasto
Pasto - 12/4/2015, 6:26 PM
Dude, you used two images of mine from some really old (and now deleted) articles....

And I'm not even mad.

Thumbed.
Utopian8418
Utopian8418 - 12/4/2015, 6:34 PM
Im a simple man, if you dont admit that Lex and Doomsday are dumb, I assume that you are a stupid DC fanboy.
LEVITIKUZ
LEVITIKUZ - 12/4/2015, 7:04 PM
You've done three response editorials.

Only care about your feelings, [frick] everybody else's.
Kyos
Kyos - 12/4/2015, 7:11 PM
After looking at the article you attempt to counter here (for Grodd's sake, this is the third time you're doing this - just add a link to the article you refer to to your own) I'd say there's a lot of hyperbole going on there. Based on what I saw the reactions to the trailer were more divisive overall, but the whole "kills all hope" angle is really taking it a bit too far.

Watch Man of Steel again, plenty of jokes.

We might disagree on the use of the word "plenty. ^^'

As for the humour shown in the latest BvS trailer - I can't say I didn't find it to be a bit weird, especially the "She with you?" part in the end. That kind of sounded 1:1 like an exhange Cap and Stark would have after, say, Captain Marvel surprisingly showed up.

Now I'm not saying it's bad per se. Not saying it neccessarily doesn't fit the actual movie. Not saying it means the movie will suck. But showing these two characters have that exchange after all the other stuff we heard in the trailers so far felt jarring. I mean, before that we had "Tell me do you bleed? You will!", "It's time you learn what it means to be a man!", "That son of a bitch brought the war to us" and all that.
Kyos
Kyos - 12/4/2015, 7:17 PM
I loved Man Of Steel regardless of hive minded hating hacks that try and ruin movies,for the general public,I personally prefer that movie over every MCU film.I think youre a hack and a hater,just a Marvel nut job,whose lost all perspective on film over a brand,like a Young adult fan girl,you internet hacks truly are pathetic.

Manti, you're starting to sound like this guy:



Regardless of what you like or dislike, and regardless of what other might say about the things you like or dislike - you don't wanna become him.
Kyos
Kyos - 12/4/2015, 7:19 PM
@YafiszKhan

You're right, my bad, I didn't see it. Sorry!
Utopian8418
Utopian8418 - 12/4/2015, 9:50 PM
I mean he looks dumb, it is not a good design, period. Maybe it is not its final form but I really find it difficult to take him seriously and i am not the only one so it is a bad design, admit it.
Utopian8418
Utopian8418 - 12/5/2015, 12:20 AM
@YafiszKhan Oh no, I couldnt care less about you admiting it. I just stated that if you didnt admit it you are an idiot.
Also I couldnt care less about the Doomsday character. I am just talking about the design, which is stupid, same thing with Quicksilver. If 50% of the audience cant take that design seriously, well, that means its a bad design. If you dont admit that the designers were wrong, then sorry but I will assume that you are a dumb fanboy defending something only because its DC.

(I am obviously exagerating and being a douche, but you get my point).
LEEE777
LEEE777 - 12/5/2015, 2:06 AM
Lets just hope its an incredible DC movie, I too have issues with who they cast as Lex but nothing can be done now. Lets hope we see what they see once we watch the movie and he's great. I'm not happy either that they are using Doomsday that comes from Zod's dead body. Also waaay to early for Doomie, love to of seen him in say a 2-parter Death/Rebirth Superman movie later on.

On to the good, which would be everything else, looks awesome, just that scene of Bats, Supes, WW alone bought my cinema ticket. Joe public's gonna love this, their gonna eat it up, and they are much bigger well known characters than most of Marvel's in this movie.

I'm no fan of Rises, especially the end but that was huge and full of plot holes and junk. I just know this movie is going to be bigger and better than that by far.

We are blessed with all these comic book movies every other month or so coming out, no point anyone shooting down this movie down, we ALL need and want this movie to succeed or the ripple could effect all of the DCEU, and there's so many good DC movies coming up.

I cant wait, only movie I've ever hated from the get go was Trank's F4 and with good reason, the crew, the cast, no one cared about the F4 from the very start. Once it came out nor did mostly anyone else! I personally support every single comic movie that's released, be it small independent to big DC, Marvel or Dark Horse.

I think Doomsday will look meaner through the movie, what we saw was just his reborn form in the trailer, the spikes and stuff will come.


Pedrito
Pedrito - 12/5/2015, 4:44 AM
You're making these WhatCulture articles sound awesome!
I'm almost tempted to check them out. But I'm faithful to CBM.
Kyos
Kyos - 12/5/2015, 10:03 AM
@AlexanderLykins

I'm afraid he is, though. I look at his channel once a week out of some sense of morbid curiosity, and he puts out 1-3 of these videos... per day. :(


@KryptonianBorn

so I talk like this?

Nah, you're right, you don't. Compared to him you're a real peach. ;) I was also aiming more at the whole "hive minded hating hacks that try and ruin movies" thing because not everyone likes MoS as much as you do. And yes, I actually agree that the article this is about was over the top negative in its tone.

Still you have to accept that maybe people simply weren't that thrilled about this specific trailer. Andrew can't do that, instead he fully embraces the idea of some sort of general "anti-DCEU/pro-MCU" conspiracy among almost all critics and youtubers etc. That's just not healthy.
Utopian8418
Utopian8418 - 12/5/2015, 2:45 PM
@YafiszKhan Haha yeah we are commenting articles on the internet after all, its kind of our job to be douches.
Here is where we disagree, the sentinels pissed me off man, I really really wanted to see the classic design. And now I probably never will for years. But at least I could take that design seriously! They didnt have awkward baby faces in any point of their 'evolution'. My point is that A LOT of people feel this way (I said 50% because ypu said that 'for every person who didnt like it, there is someone who did'). And when A LOT of people dont feel comfortable with your design, it means that you didnt do a good job designing it.
Lets agree to disagree though.
Utopian8418
Utopian8418 - 12/5/2015, 9:33 PM
@YaFiszKhan

Yeah I was talking about both types of Sentinels in the film.

I wanted to see this:


And this:


But I think that with Doomsday its worth because he should be the embodiment of death and badassism and he has a baby face (even if its not his final form) thus lame.


Buut in the end, all these DC and Marvel movies turn out awesome so I probably should quit bitching
Utopian8418
Utopian8418 - 12/5/2015, 9:40 PM
On a side note, I also wanted to see these:







And for you to see that I am no Marvel fanboy/ DC hater, these:

https://retconpunchdotcom.files.wordpress.com/2013/11/frost-giants.jpg







Again though, all these DC and Marvel movies turn out awesome haha so I really should just quit bitching
Utopian8418
Utopian8418 - 12/6/2015, 2:41 PM
@YaFiszKhan

I meant I wanted to see a badass Doomsday.

Yeah you have a good point about the sentinels.

Joaquin Phoenix was my top choice too.

And I also didnt like the designs of the frost giants (the size) and scarlet witch. Oh and Thor should have a helmet haja
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