So I have an idea for a DEADPOOL movie and you will be excited when you read this, it doesn't involve Ryan Reynolds! Yay or nay? Anyways with a Deadpool movie stuck between time and space this is my dream cast of talent I want to see within it if it ever gets made. Deadpool is violently insane and awesome and also a bit psychotic and he is very popular! I mean come on he had his own best selling video game people! Without further ado lets get this show on the pages!
TITLE: DEADPOOL BEGINS ORIGINS RISES REVENGE OF THE FLYING CHIMICHANGA MONKEYS!
Director: Nicolas Winding Refn - Now you must have read that and were like what? Well there are many fantastic reasons why Nicolas Winding Refn should direct this movie. Asides from him always wanting to direct a comic book film he is most importantly good at a balance of dark comedy and ultra violence! Mainly a highlight movie of his career which demonstrates this perfectly is Bronson!
Writers: Jonathan Nolan and Nicolas Winding Refn - I would also like NWR to write this movie but he would need help from a experienced comic book writer, someone like Jonathan Nolan! I don't think any further introduction needs to be about Jonathan Nolan people.
Rating & Runtime: R (Theatrical Cut) 2 Hours 30 Mins - NC-17 (Director's Cut) 3 Hours 10 Mins - G (Disney Channel Cut) 0.1 Seconds - NC-17 (SUPER MEGA ULTRA EXTREME VIOLENT NON SENSICLE OMG IT WILL BLOW YOUR F*CKING MIND SUPER CUT EDITION TOTALLY NOT GAY VERSION OF DEADPOOL) Infinite Years and Infinite Mins
Ryan Gosling as Deadpool / Wade Wilson - Now I know this may seem like a weird choice, and am not just picking him because I want NWR to direct. You can't deny Gosling has skill, personality, and a sheer unmistaken talent for acting. Maybe you have seen him only in his dramatic serious roles such as Drive but when he wants to make a joke he can. He would bring the kind of dark humour I would imagine Deadpool would attribute towards.
Hugh Jackman as Wolverine - Because it can't be a Deadpool film without the experience of the ever so wonderful Wolverine! Seriously it could just be a cameo or punch line joke or some kinda team up who knows.
Imogen Poots as Death - Great actress recently saw her in that box office bomb Need for Speed but who cares right! She kinda really has a great sense of humour which is what would work for this role which is all that matters! Okay you want to know a dark secret? (I don't know about most of the characters am casting so I just pick the best looking one off IMDB) there now I got that off my chest moving on!
Bryan Cranston as Cable - Take a moment, breath in and out. Then imagine, Heisenberg as Cable. Continue breathing slowly, Heisenberg as Cable. #Done.
Diane Keaton as Blind Al - Cause I don't know who the heck Blind Al is some old lady I guess so lets get Diane Keaton to play her because she is old also and oh she is great actress so yeah perfect casting and moving right along....
Joseph Gordon-Levitt as Weasel - Look I actually managed to read a description on Weasel and what his attributes are (OMG Jacky read something useful O_O). And I found out that....Weasel is just basically a nerd. Yeah okay he is very intelligent and he wears glasses! Okay go watch the movie Brick with Joseph Gordon-Levitt then come back and try to convince me am wrong about this casting!
Nicola Peltz as Vanessa Carlysle / Copycat - Because Nicola Peltz looks exactly like the character! NEXT! Sorry I just really want to finish this fast as I can not really give two shits what am writing about at this point. Ooh you can't just have the picture you nwweeed a a a deswicption soo soo weee caaaan undeeestaan uuuuu choiice and I don't giveee aa f**k. Who the heck reads this crap anyway.
Channing Tatum as Gambit - He was already cast as Gambit #suckithaters #suckiemydickie #biaatchplease. NEXT!
Ty Burrell as Mr.Sinister - Uh Mr.Sinister is this really really super evil guy who made clones n shit and he is super evil and he is so evil he makes evil scared and he often scares himself and he is so evil he totally has to be the villain! Oh and Ty Burrell looks very evil so he totally has to be Mr.Sinister because he looks evil and I don't really give a shit, NEXT!
Morgan Freeman as Doctor Emrys Killebrew - So apparently this is the dude that gave Deadpool his powers! Not that Stryker guy I seriously thought it was Stryker but it's this evil guy subtly named Dr.Killebrew. Jeeze might as well just call him Doctor Overkill. What's up with comic book names and cheesy names. So like Morgan Freeman played a villain before in that movie Wanted which was one OF THE WORST COMIC BOOK ADAPTATIONS I HAVE EVER SEEN! Alright an about to go into a mini rant about that stupid Wanted movie! IT SUCKED BALLS! Oh hey remember how awesome that Wanted graphic novel comic book series was that involved Super Villains, well we are just gonna make it into some generic Hollywood blockbuster thriller! Yeah f*ck you Hollywood! Am still waiting for THE REAL WANTED MOVIE IF YOU HAVE THE GODDAMN BALLS TO MAKE IT! Okay mini rant over, where the heck was I? Ah screw it, NEXT!
Tómas Lemarquis as Ajax - You know what, am gonna take a small nap. Be right back folks. Just continue on and I'll be back for the last one!
Nia Long as Domino - Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.....
Steve Austin as Sluggo - Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.....
Barry Pepper as Garison Kane - Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.....
Michael K. Williams as Slayback - Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.....
Ryan Reynolds as Crappy Deadpool Cosplayer - Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.....OH WHO WHAT WHEN MY STARS AND STRIPES! Alright where am I? Okay cause Ryan Reynolds played Deadpool before a really bad version and this is a comedy right!? ALRIGHT DONE NOW TIME TO POST THIS! Ah crap, I need the pictures. fml. Hold on folks while I get them. Or they probably be there by the time you finished reading this....(facepalm).
Now listen up, just only leave a comment below and "you don't need to hit that red glove" (hope some reverse psychology works!)