Hello CBMers!!!
Good folks, it be mid June, and the baseball season is in full swing! And did he? He did! It's outta here folks, a PUN homerun!!! Baseball has given the world some of Americana's biggest heroes. You know, guys like Babe Ruth and "Rookie of the Year" Henry Rowengardner. Awesome. But baseball can be so darn...boring. So, to add some punch I take some popular Marvel CBM characters and infuse them with baseball Jones. Who would be their favorite teams be, how would they run them?
Captain America - Washington Nationals
This one was not as easy at it might appear. Before they were the Nationals, back in '73 or so, their stadium was destroyed by a mutant. You remember? Yeah, they were so freaked out about that, they went and got as un-national as they could. They moved to Canada. Ah!!!!!!!! You remember when their old stadium was moved to the White House, but do you recall the Montreal Expos?? Didn't think so. Eventually they found their way back, becoming the patriot powerhouse we know today. Though, powerhouse is far to generous. Nevertheless, Cap could whip them into shape. You thought baseball had a steroid problem? Wait till Cap introduces them to super soldier serum. I can see him walking into the locker room, but all the players are standing at attention. What? One by one, they remove their ball caps to reveal "HAIL HYDRA" caps. No!!!!! Blame Canada!
Iron Man - Los Angeles Dodgers
If Cap was the patriotic guy, then the Dodgers are the perfect team for Tony Stark. He's an over pricy, California type of dude. But alas, I see him spending far too much time with that Pepper. Peppermint Schnapps! In drunken stupors, he would trade the best players for members of the band AC/DC. Then he would recommend everyone get arc reactors in their chest. Just because. But the worst would come, when he books Black Sabbath for a huge seventh inning stretch concert. Instead though, Justin Beiber shows up, thanks to the nefarious Mandarin. He falls for it everytime.
Wolverine - Toronto Blue Jays
First thing Wolvie does, rename the team. Oh yeah, he changes it to...wait for it...the Toronto Sabertooths :-o absurd. He would site the city reminding him of someone with long nails. Kinda like he had back in '73, remember when he went around scratching people. All I can say, good thing he knew a guy. I don't think Wolverine's nails would have been enough. With the new name, this Toronto team would become the best Canadian ball club in the major leagues! Oh irony.
Spider-man - New York Mets
Oh yeah baby! Just think of all the great things Spidey could do for the Mets! They would always have their eggs at breakfast time! Thus doubling their win total! That'slike, probably forty games! Ultimately though, sports are just not very compatible with Spiderman. All he does it destroy rims and goalposts. Hate to imagine what he do at the ole ball park. That is, if he ever showed up! Everytime he gets to the stadium he runs away in great fear, something about seeing a Captain Stacy ghost. Can't be to hard on the young fellow(yeah right!), most would run from Dennis Leary ghost. ;) hyphens!!!
Thanks for the read everyone! Hopefully you chuckled ever so slightly. And if you did enjoy, be sure to click that red gloved thumb.