Let's face it, we all love Zack Snyder. Some of us love hating him, but that's the same thing. The opposite of love is not hate but indifference, someone wise once told me. We probably all want to know something more about this stunning, handsome man that gave us unforgettable experiences such as 300, Watchmen, Man of Steel, and Sucker Punch (I said unforgettable). A man full of energy, who, according to Scoot McNairy, does a lot of things during his day.
Well, with that in mind, I used my non-existent inside source at Warner Bros. Entertainment to learn something about him. Here I give you what it's likely to be Zack "The Pimp" Snyder's typical day.
0:00 - 3:00 AM Dream about flyng skinny hot young women fighting against Nazi-Dinosaurs with lasers, all covered with a grey filter.
3:00 AM Wake up.
3:01 AM Do 50 push-ups,50 pull-ups, 100 crunches, 200 squats. Get a new tattoo.
3:30 AM You need no breakfast. Get some ladies instead.
4:00 AM Go to the BvS set. Laugh at Ben Affleck, then remember he's in your movie.
4:01 AM Laugh at Ben Affleck anyway.
4:01 - 12:00 AM Shoot the movie. Make Gal Gadot wear a motion-capture suit in order to CGI some mass and acting on her in the editing room. Go around in your scooter between breaks. Laugh at Scoot McNairy because now you remembered his name.
12:00 PM You need no lunch. Get a new tattoo instead.
1:00 PM Do 200 push-up, 200 pull-ups, 400 crunches, 800 squats.
1:30 PM Call a radio station and do a rant because they're disparaging about Squirrel Girl, tell them that she could cut Superman if she wanted to. Heavily insult Marvel Studios employees' mothers in the process.
2:00 PM Go back to the set, get some ladies.
3:00 - 7:00 PM Shoot the film. Erect a Superman statue, then destroy it, because YOU CAN. Remember, YOU'RE A PIMP.
7:00 PM Go back home. You need no stinkin's dinner. Get a new tattoo instead.
8:00 PM Do 500 push-up, 500 pull-ups, 1000 crunches, 2000 squats.
9:00 PM Prank call Kevin Feige, pretending to be Edgar Wright.
9:30 PM Prank call David S. Goyer, pretending to be Martian Manhunter.
10:00 PM Call DCGuy, tell him to calm the f*ck down.
10:30 PM Call Michael Bay to talk about the good ol' school days.
11:00 PM - 0:00 AM Do 9000+ push-ups, pass out in the process.
0:00 AM Repeat.