A Slightly More Positive Review Of Conan The Barbarian

A Slightly More Positive Review Of Conan The Barbarian

A second review for Marcus Nispel's Conan remake has hit the web, and although it still goes pretty harsh on the movie, it also points to some redeeming features. Check it out..

By MarkCassidy - Aug 15, 2011 08:08 PM EST
Filed Under: Conan
Source: Twitch

Twitchfilm have posted their review of Conan The Barbarian. It's not what you would call a thumbs up, but it's not nearly as scathing as the first review we posted and suggests that there will be something to enjoy for action/gore fans at least and praise Jason Momoa's performance.



The negative points they make are pretty much the same as the Playlist's: bad script, pacing, dialog etc so I'll just post the positive excerpts..

..for its many flaws, unoriginal plot, wooden acting and atrocious pacing, Conan succeeds on some level because it fulfills the quota of a manly man beating stuff to a pulp.

..All of the scenes are driven by exposition, some set pieces are tame, others are quite stunning but it is too jarring and each scene simply strings onto the next.

Jason Momoa is excellent as Conan, he kills stuff really well, demeans women and eats stuff really fast, there is not much more you can look for in a barbarian. Unfortunately, the pure blood Marique and Zym are after Tamara is played by Rachel Nichols and is the most grating and poorly acted character. In fact, she makes everyone else beam in comparison - delivering her lines poorly, stumbling over the fantasy names and having no accent at all. Zym and Marique snarl and growl a lot and everyone else who is not them or Conan provides helpful information to the audience about the plot.

Conan is not a good film, it misses that mark by a long shot. But for its pulp and gory action it can easily be recommended. If you are in the mood for a brainless guilty pleasure, look no further, and like all films of this ilk, the poor ending hints blatantly at a sequel.


For the full review click the link below. What do you think Conan fans? Does this give you any more hope for the movie?




By: TwitterButtons.com

By TwitterButtons.com



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Anthrax
Anthrax - 8/15/2011, 8:33 PM
omg really*sigh*lionsgate [frick]s up
genesis609
genesis609 - 8/15/2011, 8:37 PM
Damn... oh well now jason can play skaar lol
40oz
40oz - 8/15/2011, 8:39 PM
Brainless guilty pleasure... Check
95
95 - 8/15/2011, 8:43 PM
Um, I still think this is going to be a shitty, soul-less film. Or atleast that's what their trailer spells out.
chasesuperremey
chasesuperremey - 8/15/2011, 8:43 PM
now i will have to go see it because when they say it sucks it turns out to be a great flick why do these pepole get to tell me what to like? And if i do like it im dumb for likeing it i dont judge them for like crap that puts me to sleep in five minutes.
ClarkFarley2012
ClarkFarley2012 - 8/15/2011, 8:44 PM
Lol I knew that this movie would be wack.
CaptLacLac
CaptLacLac - 8/15/2011, 8:47 PM
if you check out rotten tomatoes - 3 out of 4 reviews are positive
40oz
40oz - 8/15/2011, 8:52 PM
And one of the reviewers on RTs that liked it is a milf... That's awesome
headlopper
headlopper - 8/15/2011, 8:54 PM
Very slightly.
brewtownpsych
brewtownpsych - 8/15/2011, 9:05 PM
movie is clearly shyt ... they are not telling you what to do. go spend your money and mindless drivel, hollywood has the last laugh and the rest of us suffer b/c they can get away with crap like this and people will go to anything.
Dmon
Dmon - 8/15/2011, 9:06 PM
What the [frick] I am sick of editors of this site cherry picking reviews. 3 out of 4 reviewers on Rotten Tomatoes have given a good review. How come Ror you did not pick one of the good ones to post?
Justinishulk
Justinishulk - 8/15/2011, 9:10 PM
well, i don't care... i will watch it!!!
NeoBaggins
NeoBaggins - 8/15/2011, 9:30 PM
Rotten tomatoe critics have some weird way they decide what they will rate good or bad. This movie looks like pure deluxe shit, but I wouldn't be surprised if it got a fresh rating. One the positive reviews right now is by some lady who gave Conan a fresh and Deathly Hallows 2 a rotten lol.

Ready, aim, fire... credibility, shot.
Ranger14
Ranger14 - 8/15/2011, 9:37 PM
Hmm...someone posted this on a Batman/Bane thread. Sound familiar Neo?

" I can't speak for anyone else, but if I hated Nolan and the direction this film was going, it would be odd of me to ride the nuts of EVERY SINGLE article that comes out and basically repeat my position- each time, my deliver more crude than the last. I reckon i'd be a Troll if I did that. A douchebag I guess."
Ceejay
Ceejay - 8/15/2011, 9:59 PM
Couldn't give a frak what the reviewers think, I'm paying for all that brainless action, sword skill and demeaning of women and if that's comes with a loose cohesive plot to follow then fine, at no point of any sword & sorcery film I've ever seen has their been a plot worthy of Oscar nomination or the odd actor who hams up a performance in costume. I wasn't expecting the next Lord of the Rings and nothing in the genre of movies ever got even HALF as good as that so frak expectations and moaning about what it isn't; bring on the bloody fights and sex and make mine a double!
NeoBaggins
NeoBaggins - 8/15/2011, 10:01 PM
Ranger14 Post ALL IF IT, not PART OF IT.

"Don't get me wrong though; I have a couple of films I like to kick.-Me

Now; here's a quote of mine you can learn something from.

I also get a good laugh from people I don't agree with because hey, I'ts not my movie.-Me

Now, where were we. Oh yeah, shit.
thereaper27
thereaper27 - 8/15/2011, 10:22 PM
you had me at "demeaning to women"
superpooper
superpooper - 8/15/2011, 10:23 PM
What kind of journalist is this that wrote this review? Was this copied verbatim or translated from Cambodian because it sounds like this person has a rudimentary grasp of the English language at best (no offense to any cambodians out there-you can cut and paste any non-english language you like instead). I don't think I can take this persons review too seriously.
Ranger14
Ranger14 - 8/15/2011, 10:29 PM
Neo@ That wasn't part of that post. You posted again and put that out there, but you also chose here to leave off the next sentence.

"Don't get me wrong though; I have a couple of films I like to kick. I don't visit every single thread, but I admit, some times my intent is evil."

You have visited and commented pretty much on every Conan thread. I don't find you a troll...annoying perhaps...but just on the Conan threads... but you certainly seemed to define yourself as one.
Aaesir
Aaesir - 8/15/2011, 10:36 PM
Momoa would make a great Kull, because we've never seen a successful adaptation of that character. He doesn't make a good Conan though.
JohnClayBurchett
JohnClayBurchett - 8/15/2011, 10:40 PM
sounds about right. Momoa was still a terrible cast regardless of how good or terrible he did.
NeoBaggins
NeoBaggins - 8/15/2011, 11:09 PM
Ranger14 You have a personal beef with my opinion of this film. I feel at this point, right now, it is unatural. I don't disagree with you on much around here, but if this Conan thing is too dear to you, you should just ignore me. I'm going to speak on it. Why? I'm a fan Conan and fantasy films in general. I also hate the fact that when a cheap production gets it's hands on a good property, the shitty movie kills any chance of it ever having a life as a decent franchise.

A troll doesn't explain his position. He just runs into a room, yells out something sucks, then he's on his way to the next thing. A troll is is hateful and harsh. I might make a joke but you won't catch wishing death on Momao and saying thatt the irector should quit directing blah blah blah. I don't do that.

So, take this for what it simply is; you liking Conan and wanting this movie to be great, while I keep reminding you why it won't be. I'd ignore me if I were you. If I post more than once on a Conan thread it's only because someone can't accept others opinions and wants to discuss my opinion with ME. Or, I'm having fun. So remember; it's not your movie, you won't change my mind, I will continue to speak on it as I see fit like WE ALL DO.

PS: You, are, going to, LOVE, this movie. I gaurantee it. =)
OnLeatherWings
OnLeatherWings - 8/15/2011, 11:16 PM
I find it hard to believe that anybody actually wanted to see this and though it would be good. this had shit written all over it from the very beginning. i hate remakes and i hate Hollywood for supporting them.
OnLeatherWings
OnLeatherWings - 8/15/2011, 11:16 PM
I find it hard to believe that anybody actually wanted to see this and though it would be good. this had shit written all over it from the very beginning. i hate remakes and i hate Hollywood for supporting them.
Ranger14
Ranger14 - 8/15/2011, 11:20 PM
You apparently haven't read all my posts because I have stated what my reservations about the film could be and why I would be disappointed if they don't deliver in certain areas. One thing I do know is that it will be a better Conan film than the first one. There is no doubt in my mind on that.

Unnatural? You are irritating on the Conan threads....nothing unnatural about that. Hey...you defined a troll in the other thread...not me. I guess I am behaving in an unnatural way and you are just being odd (your words) ;-)

You reminding me why it won't be great? For you it won't be great even if it is great. You have made up your mind already, whereas I haven't made up my mind it will be great. I will remain optimistic until I see the film. I haven't seen anything that has me concerned yet. It has the action and brutal violence, better look and feel for what Hyboria should be, better look for Conan..boobs....sure...I am optimistic. Like I said, I do know it will be better than the first one. That will be a major victory in and of itself, though it certainly doesn't mean it will be great.
NeoBaggins
NeoBaggins - 8/15/2011, 11:48 PM
Why "victory" though? lol What's this axe to grind with the original film? Why does Arnold have to be put down to lift this fim up? It should work on it's own. And let's face it, it's pretty pitiful if a 2011 film has to find victory over one made nearly 30 YEARS AGO.

"One thing I do know is that it will be a better Conan film than the first one.

Technically, it SHOULD BE. Even if Conan 3D's FX are second rate and the production is low budget, there is three decades of film making advancements that should be better than the orginal film, EASILY. This is pre-school. However, a shinier take does not gaurantee a hit, much less a classic. But yeah, it LOOKS light years ahead of Arnolds version. Duh

I'm a man of honor. Even if I think a film looks like its going to be shit, I'll admit that it isn't if it's not. I was bored stupid with Captain America trailers and clips. It looked ultra MEH at best and I expressed my thoughts on it, at length. But I enjoyed the film and I can say so. It's only better than Green Lantern among this years CBMs, but it had more charm than I expected. If I saw Conan and it was actually good, I'd say so after talking major shit about it. It's good if the film is good. Popcorn cost a hundred dollars.

In the end, Conan looks so bad that I dont have any intentions of seeing it. And if I dont, I wont stick around talking shit about it. Maybe if RT gives it the dubious fresh rating, it might get me to the theater. Thats the only reason I saw Planet of the Apes. I was like, hell nall, there's NO WAY this shit is THAT good.

So, there you have it.
MaddMonkk
MaddMonkk - 8/15/2011, 11:57 PM
I'm going to watch it and like he said in the review "But for its pulp and gory action it can easily be recommended. If you are in the mood for a brainless guilty pleasure, look no further," That's exactly what I expected with this movie! My mind is all ready for this and maybe after this I might watch "The Color Purple" and see which one is the better barbarian movie.
113
113 - 8/16/2011, 1:08 AM
Rachel Nichols is hot but it's obviously from GI Joe that she cannot act for shit
AsianVersionOfET
AsianVersionOfET - 8/16/2011, 1:22 AM
NeoBaggins FTW!!!!
SuperSomething616
SuperSomething616 - 8/16/2011, 1:41 AM
Damn I was really looking forward to this film too.... :(
ElColmillo
ElColmillo - 8/16/2011, 2:01 AM
This is the new Clash of the titans :3
DDD
DDD - 8/16/2011, 2:32 AM
I knew this would be awful,
NISPEL directed it! The man
does not know how to direct people.

Momoa's acting is so awful in this,
just like I said it would be. But I
believe it's the director's fault,
not the actors.

They can put all kinds of FX in a movie
but if the people/characters don't capture
your heart then the movie is an empty big-
boom movie with no soul.

Every NISPEL movie I've unfortunately seen
the people didn't seem to have any soul!
PaulRom
PaulRom - 8/16/2011, 5:00 AM
It's 80% on RT as we speak. And I'm definitely seeing it when it comes out, mostly to see if Rachel Nichols shows her boobs.
ElBicho
ElBicho - 8/16/2011, 5:12 AM
Dude, it's CONAN! WTF was this "critic" expecting? Pretty sure this one was never going to snag an oscar.

Lighten up, Nancy and enjoy the ass kicking!
marvel72
marvel72 - 8/16/2011, 5:56 AM
nichols shows of them amazing funbags i'm definetly watching this.
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