G.I. Joe Review by Dan Hewitt

G.I. Joe Review by Dan Hewitt

British view of G.I. JOE, warning may contain spoilers!

Review Opinion
By CBMcontributor - Aug 06, 2009 05:08 PM EST
Filed Under: G.I. Joe

First of all, I have never had any affiliation with G.I. Joe before today, being British I had Action Man, rather than G.I. Joe. But when the film ended I had learned so much about each individual character it was like I had known them for years!

Beginning in the 1600's we say an ancestor of James McCullen being forced to wear an iron man mask for selling to both sides during the war. Now in the not too distant future James himself is an arms dealer and owner of M.A.R.S. He has created nanites and plans to sell them to every nation and then steal them back.

Our introduction to Duke and Ripcord. They must protect for America, of course they are attacked. Revealing The Baroness and eventually Alpha Team of G.I. Joe. Duke and Ripcord then undergo training and join the team.

Now rather than spoil the whole story I'll just some up how I felt about each character and the SFX and story.

CHARACTERS

Duke: Typical action hero, good American soldier, Tatum performs well.
Ripcord: Wayans does well in his role, don't know about America but we Brits found him very funny, especially with Scarlett.
Scarlett: Shy girl and we learn some small background with her, to be explored in a sequel I think.
Breaker: Fairly annoying tech boy.
Heavy Duty: Over the top accent and over the top performance, worst of the goodies.
Hawk: Cheesy dialogue but good enough.
Snake eyes: Brilliant loved every minute he was on.
Storm Shadow: Good, very enjoyable.
Baroness: Somewhat predictable story-line.
Zartan: Fairly humorous performance.
McCullen: Very bad accent, if they wanted a Scotsman, HIRE ONE!
Doctor: Phenomenal, I'm not even joking a modern day Vader, the scary villain. Although McCullen is the face of evil the brain is the Doctor.

OK, the FX in someplaces sucked hard! They definately picked there battles. All the animation between scenes is just despicable. But in chases and shootouts it's perfect so not too bad overall. The Destro transformation and Doctor is quite "bone-chilling" according to one of my fellow viewers.

Story-line works well but there is obviously predictability with it but overall it is coherent and sets up many sequels.

Overall, this is by far one of the best summer blockbuster movies ever, it's got a good flow and sure there is cheese but sometimes you need it to make a good sandwich!

Score 9/10

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LEEE777
LEEE777 - 8/6/2009, 6:32 PM
HELL YEAH!!!

Great article dude, cant wait!!! ; )

GI JOE = DARK HORSE OF THE SUMMER!!!
Hewster
Hewster - 8/7/2009, 11:36 AM
Oh my god, dellamorte i saw you on other reviews you're so weird. I'm a British film student and comic fan. The fact you think that Paramount are planting on these fansites when sites like ign say it is 3.5 stars and better than transformers 2, they dont need to plant shit. Get a life freakazoid!
superdog
superdog - 8/7/2009, 3:15 PM
yeah, its not to hard to do an avatar. i think those are the studio plants. they dont have the time or the knowledge to do the site right.

the doctor and destro were HILARIOUS!!!!! not bone chilling. they wouldnt scare a frigen 3 year old let alone an adult. maybe you british scare easily. apparently you are easily amused to cause ripcord was as unfunny as could be.
Hewster
Hewster - 8/7/2009, 3:22 PM
Ha there you are there's you're [frick]ing avatar! I couldn't be arsed to do one cos I thought people weren't so sad that they would be like oh my god he hasn't got an avatar, kinda sad!

Why you gotta be so aggressive, come on I'm trying to do something nice there are so many people bad mouthing this film who haven't seen it. I know when to leave my brain at home and when to analyse stuff and I found it enjoyable, fairly funny and at times it was pretty rough with violence. Deformed faces, burnt faces, being burnt alive, have your skin eaten away, that shit is pretty tough for a 8 year old hoping for an Action Man film.

You're welcome to your opinions I'm not forcing you to believe me I'm just saying relax there are much worse things in life than this movie. And calm down with the whole Paramount conspiracy cos I tried to see it in my local cinema without booking and i ended up travelling for twenty minutes on a bus to get to a bigger cinema and even then I had to sit in the middle of the cinema rather than back! Cost me nearly twenty quid overall!
superdog
superdog - 8/7/2009, 3:51 PM
hewster@ i would agree with you that it was pretty violent. i couldn't believe the stuff they were doing, i mean how many times did scarlett shoot someone in the head with her crossbow? women getting stabbed right through the chest, blood. it was pretty violent for an 8 year old. but then they put all the silly stuff in thier with the jokes to get the 8 year olds. i felt like they were conflicted. they didnt know whether to go straight action, straight special effects, or appeal to kids. i think they tried to do all and it was just too much. sorry if i came off harsh. :)
KurtCrawler
KurtCrawler - 8/7/2009, 4:57 PM
Yay superdog really violent. When ripcord ran that car thing into the viper was violent, and pretty cool!
superdog
superdog - 8/7/2009, 5:18 PM
Yeah the forklift. Right through his gut. But then seconds later they have cartoonish shit. It was all very surreal
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