EDITORIAL: BatmanHeisenberg’s Top Ten Movies Ever
The history of cinema is vast, and large. And this site is dedicated to a certain sector of them. I know for a fact you have been wondering for the near year I’ve been here that you want to know and see BatmanHeisenberg’s top ten movie list. Hit the jump to read someone else’s opinion you so want to know!
I would start the article out with foreplay and a little history lesson or some shit to get you started and warmed up. But guess what?
So yeah. Also, if you disagree, post a list in the comments or whatever. Or don’t. Or propose to Intruder or Gusto. God knows they need it. I don’t give a [frick]. Wow, I am going on longer than I thought I would. Bad news, not going in dry. Might contain some spoilers. Anyway, enough foreplay, here’s the list:
#11: Anchorman
What? An 11? What the hell? That’s cheating! Yes it is, and Yup, I wanted to include it,and I love it. 70’s was so classy. Nothing like hairy chests, the Vietnam War and disco and Queen. But yeah, I love Ron Burgundy, and I love this movie.
#10: Forrest Gump
You might be like, what the hell BatmanHeisenberg. SO GENERIC. So what? The reason for it being so generic is that it deserves it. It’s amazing. Maybe not the Oscar, but nonetheless I love it. Got it?
#9: A Clockwork Orange
Cult classic. Absolutely amazing. I mean, I’d be pretty [frick]ed up to if I was subjected to Nazi videos and rape videos. But yeah, it has some great deep meanings and stuff. I love it a lot.
#8: Reservoir Dogs
Most of it takes place in a warehouse. It’s great. I can tell you personally that an earcutting scene really brightens my mood. Just does. Call me a whackjob, but I disagree. But yeah, great movie.
#7: Inglorious Basterds
I hate Nazis. I think most sane(even insane) people can agree they’re not the best people to go out and get roofied with. Maybe that’s just me. But I just love Tarantino, and I love seeing Hitler turned into a pile of swiss cheese.
#6: Star Wars Trilogy(Original, not the [frick]ed up “prequels”)
Yup, here begins some cheating. I don’t care. It’s amazing. I love all three. Sure, the ewoks weren’t amazing, but hey, it’s still awesome.
#5: Django Unchained
As much as I hate Nazi’s, I hate Confederates around the same. Sure, they didn’t commit a genocide against a race of people, the committed slavery though. And seeing an all star cast like this do it? Awesome. I mean, I love seeing people ripped apart by bullets ina spaghetti western style. Did I mention the awesome cast?
#4: Lord of the Rings Trilogy
Yup. More cheating. Great epic fantasy. I love the epic fantasy fight scenes. The epic dialogue. The landscape and world. And the fact that Gollum looks worse than a crack addict. Jeez. He looks worse than Gusto’s 5th ex-wife.
#3: Terminator 2: Judgement Day
Great movie. Epic score. Great action scenes. Revolutionary special effects. Near perfect all around. Maybe not a perfect time travel logic, but otherwise great. Plus seeing someone decompose instantly by a nuke is always great.
#2: The Dark Knight Trilogy
Amazing. Epic. Absolute perfection in my eyes. I consider it to be the long journey of a single man. Just great. It is sad about his ongoing fight with throat cancer.
#1: TIE: Pulp Fiction and The Shawshank Redemption
Yup. A tie. I love both so equally. Shawshank is a capture of the human spirit, and Pulp Fiction is just [frick]ing awesome. I mean, Pulp Fiction is just plain awesome. Amazing movie soundtrack, amazing cast, great dialogue, everything. And lots of ridiculous things happening, like someone getting raped by a hillbilly. And a cameo from Gusto as the gimp, of course. And Shawshank is just a wonderful masterpiece that shows the spirit of the human soul.
That wraps it up. I would make an epic ending, but I don’t feel like it. So just comment, I guess.