Why do we care about the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?

The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are now thirty years old. Their first appearance was in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles #1 published by Mirage Studios in 1984. They were conceived by Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird one night when the two of them were messing around sketching. The duo’s intention was to parody the popular comics of the time, particularly those of Daredevil and Ronin writer Frank Miller. The most obvious examples of this are The Foot Clan, and Splinter. Both are little jabs at Marvel’s Daredevil comics. In those comics the organised ninja crime syndicate is called The Hand, and Daredevil’s master is named Stick. Even from the beginning the Turtles were little more than a joke.

But their design was undeniably iconic. And more importantly, perfect for merchandising. Various companies, most notably Playmates Toys, set about creating the toys. But they wouldn’t sell on their own. They needed some exposure.

Enter the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Television show.

For most fans, especially those around my age, this is where it all began. You ask a vast number of fans to describe the central characters and this is what you’ll get in response: “Splinter taught them to be ninja teens (He's a radical rat!)
Leonardo leads, Donatello does machines (That's a fact, Jack!)
Raphael is cool but crude (Gimme a break!)
Michelangelo is a party dude (Party!)”   

That theme tune is almost as important as the character designs themselves in terms of getting the TMNT into the hearts and minds of children the world over. “Turtle Power!” “Heroes in a half shell” etc, all the popular phrases that we associate with the characters originate in that song. Even their characterisation comes down to those four simple lines of verse. As far as cartoon theme songs go it’s up there with The Real Ghostbusters and DuckTales as the all time best.

The show quickly became a monster success, and the Turtles were everywhere. Toys, lunchboxes, videogames, cereals, you name it and the Turtles were on it. They were huge, so obviously it was only a matter of time before Hollywood came knocking.

1990 saw the release of the first live-action film. The Jim Henson Creature Shop did some of the work on bringing the Turtles to life and their efforts were impressive, especially for the time. Surprising no one the film was a success, eventually spawning two more live action movies.

But over time they began to fade away. Once the cartoon series finished they tried to revive the Turtles popularity with an all new live action television show entitled Ninja Turtles: The Next Mutation. The only thing notable about the show was the introduction of Venus De Milo, the female turtle. It was swiftly cancelled and never spoken of again. That was 1997.

It wasn’t until 2003 that a new animated show arrived, which did well enough, lasting until 2009 but never enjoying the popularity the original show attained. Then Nickelodeon bought the rights and started their own show which continues to this day.  

But it was Michael Bay who brought the world’s gaze back to those green teens when he announced he would be producing a live action reboot of the TMNT franchise that would drop the “Teenage Mutant” from the title. And that they would be aliens. Though this angle was quickly downplayed, and is possibly now completely gone from the movie. As more and more news came out fans were given more and more reasons to be sceptical. Megan Fox is April O’Neil. Johnny Knoxville is Leonardo. William Fichtner is Shredder, whose name is not Oroku Saki but Eric Sachs. Shredder and April’s father are responsible for the creation of the turtles.

And then the concept art for the Turtles was released. Their image is such a large part of the appeal, so why mess with it? But mess with it they did. They had ears and noses.
Human noses.

Fans went ape shit.

But here is the thing. We don’t really know why. I call myself a TMNT fan. In fact, as I write this I’m sat next to a pair of Bebop and Rocksteady figurines that have been on my desk for some time (who by the way won’t be in the upcoming film. Boo!). So yeah, I’m a fan. But, and here’s where this all gets confusing, I don’t particularly rate any single piece of narrative work that bears the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle name. I’ve never seen the Nickelodeon series. Or the one that preceded it. The Next Mutation is flat out terrible. The live action films range from a not entirely unpleasant way to spend 90 minutes (the first one) to an absolute turkey (the third one). As a kid, yeah, I thought they were fun, but even then I could see they weren’t essential. The original cartoon series should be commended for telling one continuous story, each episode starting where the last one finished, something quite daring when considering the attention span of children, but when watched now it’s neither as funny nor as exciting as remembered. And here’s the final omission:

I’ve never read the comics.

So how am I a fan? And more importantly, if I don’t massively care for any of the existing TMNT stuff, why do I give a damn about the upcoming movie?

For me, this is where it all comes back to that title sequence from the original TV show. I see Leonardo, Donatello, Raphael, Mikey, and Splinter brightly bouncing around the screen, and I hear those words “Splinter taught them to be ninja teens (He's a radical rat!)
Leonardo leads, Donatello does machines (That's a fact, Jack!)
Raphael is cool but crude (Gimme a break!)
Michelangelo is a party dude (Party!)”, and I know all I need to know about those characters. Their personalities are clearly defined. They are the typical TV gang, the archetypes that have been used since the beginning of the medium. The leader, the brains, the muscle, and the wild card. But on top of that they are anthropomorphic turtles who are also freaking ninjas! It’s a concept and a design you just can’t ignore. And that’s why I’m a fan. The Turtles are bigger than anything they’ve ever been in, be it the comics, the shows, the games, or the films. They are icons in the same way Batman and Spiderman are. They may have started off as nothing more than a joke, than a parody of what was currently going on in comics, but that doesn’t mean Laird and Eastman didn’t capture lightning in a bottle with the idea. Their images will be a part of popular culture for as long as there is a popular culture. They transcend their own material.

But, and this is why I do give a damn about the upcoming movie, that doesn’t mean I'm happy with their stuff being subpar. Yes, they are bigger than any one movie, but that doesn't mean that the one movie gets a pass. The comics (regardless of quality) started off as a joke, and the television shows and movies only existed to get parents buying merchandise. The Turtles will outlast whatever Michael Bay’s company eventually churns out, but wouldn’t it be nice this time if the Turtles actually got to put their name on something that was worthy of them.