If you know Joey, you know that he's a No Nonsense, Ball Busting, Anti-Fanboy, Quick Wit Humor kind of guy. I always enjoy his stuff.
Anyways, check it out:
I was working on my next article having to do with how Iron Man 3 is not what the box office makes it out to be, when out of no where, I was slapped upside the head with the realization that
“IRON MAN 3 SHARES TOO MANY DAMN SIMILARITIES WITH THE DARK KNIGHT TRILOGY TO BE A COINCIDENCE”! Now before I get bent over by Marvel Loyalist and get deemed a “DC Fanboy” or a “Nolanite”, I will say that I absolutely LOVED Iron Man I, enjoyed Iron Man 2, enjoyed Batman Begins, loved The Dark Knight and did not care at all for The Dark Knight Rises! This is all observation, so reserve judgement until I present the facts below. There are a lot of issues with Iron Man 3 that I will discuss in my next article. Until then, let us all explore exactly where I am going when I say, “Imitation is the best form of flattery”! Except in this case there are TOO many similarities that makes Drew Pearce and Shane Black’s IM3 look nothing more than a copy of Nolan’s Batman done with a Iron Man overhaul! So all you Marvel Die-Hards, attempt the practice of having an open mind, don’t kick the dog, put holes in the wall, swallow your tongue in rage or attempt bodily harm to yourself. Allow this to all unfold and then the floor is yours to debate it as you see fit. Jabs like “You F*&^ing loser”, “Your Mom is a Whore” or many other off color remarks will only make me laugh because it will confirm what I am showing to everyone is true! An intelligent response and debate is always welcome. Now, I may explain some parts and others I may use but a few choice words since the pictures will explain it all!
1.
BROKEN MAN LYING DOWN – Wayne just
had his world ripped from under him and he is now on the floor bleeding. Stark, um,
just had his world ripped from under him and he is now on the floor bleeding.
2.
BROKEN FACE OF THE HERO – Bane beats the BeJesus out of Batman and his broken Cowl is artistically shown, representing
The Dark Knight’s defeat. Pepper Potts is holding
Iron Man‘s Helmet that is …. Wait A Minute! …. broken showing his defeat AND they use it artistically! Hmmmm, something is not right here!
ADDED BONUS: Isn’t funny how right after Batman (Bruce Wayne) visits Gordon in the hospital he has the snot beat out of him by Bane, is broken and then
starts his road to “Super Hero Recovery”? Of course (I will spell it out for those still refusing to take the “Marvel Knee-Pads” off), right after Tony Stark (Iron Man) visits Harry in the hospital he has the his ass handed to him by The Mandarin’s goons, is broken and
then starts his road to “Super Hero Recovery”?! Oh Boy!
A CRAPTASTIC WTF Moment just hit me! Check the image below!
WTF!? MOMENT: Can ANYONE explain to me how for the love of GOD that Stark, Potts and Hansen are not DEAD after having like 5+ Stinger Missiles and a couple of Chain Guns lighting this house up like The New Years Ball dropping in Times Square!!?? The missiles blast alone would create enough of a concussion to scramble their freaking brains! It all makes no sense I tell ya!!!
3.
NOT WHAT THEY SEEM – Ras Al’ Ghul was the head chief of The League Of Shadows who used terrorism as a method to advance their ideas. Using the theme of
“Things are not always what they appear to be”, another person was used to deflect who the real mastermind was. All the while, having everyone believe the stand in was the ‘Real McCoy’! The Mandarin was the head …. errr …. chief of The Ten Rings who used …. um …. terrorism as a method to advance their ideas. Using the theme of
“Things are not always what they appear to be”, another person was used to deflect who the real mastermind was. All the while, having everyone believe the stand in was the ‘Real McCoy’! Okay People! Something is not right with this picture!
4. PISSED OFF LOVERS – Batman thinks he defeated Bane, when out of no where, Talia shanks his ass! She heads off while ordering Bane, who is recovering from an ass whooping, to proceed and finish off Batman! BOOM! Catwoman comes in like a
“Bat out of Hell”, pops a Bat-Grenade from the Bat-Pod in Bane’s gut and finishes him off, in turn saving our hero!! So Tony has no suit that seems to work correctly
(even with all 50 flying around) and is on the ground defenseless as the Extremis induced fire-breathing Killian is about to finish him off. BOOM! Extremis Pepper …. that shit still doesn’t sound right …. comes out of no where to put a Estrogen induced whooping on Aldrich’s ass, in turn saving our hero! … ?? … ! So you are going to tell me that two pissed off retribution seeking “That’s My Man” nut kicking females SAVE THE HERO at the END OF THE MOVIE and it isn’t the same? Something is starting to smell like a 3 day old filled diaper that has been roasting in the sun the whole time!
That's just a small portion of a lot of valid points Joey made. You can find the rest of the article over at The Fanboy Factor.