The Tale of The Intergalactic Octopus and his Bleeding Koala

100,000,000 years ago. This is neither a lie nor is it entirely the truth, I'd say its a bit of a mixture of both. But, that's not entirely relevant, what really matters is the gods of the planet of stale nachos descended upon us and said "Let there be Cheese", and thus there was Cheese. 90,000 years later the Universe gave birth to a Cosmic Koala that infinitely bled the blood of a thousand billion planets, but a massive event caused the Cosmic Koala to go into a deep, impenetrable slumber. The Cosmic Koala did not awaken again for another 2,000 years. And when that Koala did awaken, multiple solar systems were wiped out from the sheer Cosmic force of the Cosmic Koala's might. Now is where the real fun begins, my friends. Now is when we enter into a new realm entirely. "Escroit E'liio Sunhgh Thessilie" These are holy words, said the Koala to the Moon. Yes, my friend. I finally believe you, finally we can be free, free from our cages. Now the real story begins. "As much as my soul tears at the thought of losing my only friend, i always knew it would end up like this in the end" The Koala shed a tear, this lone tear gave life to an Octopus. The Octopus was so deeply inspired by the loving heart of the Cosmic Bleeding Koala that he devoted his entire soul to becoming one with the Universe, after a millenia he finally transcended our reality and became known as the Intergalactic Octopus. Majestic oceans embraced the Octopus and whispered into his ear "I love you" This brought him to tears. Now, you can imagine that the Cosmic Koala heard all of this and I'm certain you can imagine just what he decided to do, he decided to allow the Octopus to become HIS BEST FRIEND AND THEN THEY ROCKETED OFF IN THEIR MAGICAL UNICORN SPACESHIP THAT BLARED ROCKIN' TUNES THROUGHOUT THE COSMOS.