What I Fear Michael Bay Will Do Next

Disclaimer: I know Michael Bay isn't directing or writing the new TMNT movie. However, he has been onboard the project since Day One, so I imagine he will have had considerable influence on the film.

Michael Bay. One of the most notorious filmakers in modern cinema. He has his fans, but most fans see him as the cinematic devil incarnate. Regardless, his films make money, that's for sure. So with his popularity rising, its only a matter of time before he gets his hands on another beloved franchise.....

Pokemon.
Yes, Pokemon. There's been rumours of a new live-action adaptation of Pokemon for years now. But what would a Michael Bay Pokemon film look like?

For starters, Shia LaBeouf would probably play Ash Ketchum. He would be 15-16 years old, and an irritating, juvenile, awkward retard instead of the naive, optimistic Ash we know and love. Misty would be played by Megan Fox (obviously), and this time Michael Bay has an extra excuse to make her wear very little- Misty runs the Water Gym! So throughout the film Misty would probably be wearing swimwear. Brock would be like John Turturro was in the first three films- the guy who's supposed to be serious but is reduced to being a focal point for crude humour. Team Rocket would be some sort of paramilitary organisation with machine guns, just like the Foot Clan in the new NInja Turtles film! The Pokemon themselves would proably largely consist of outdated racial stereotypes and 'tough guy' characters. They would mainly be side characters, and the vast majority of the film would focus on the 'relationship' between Ash and Misty. And they would be aliens!

So, what do you think a Michael Bay Pokemon film would look like? And what other beloved franchises do you think Michael Bay will screw up next? How will he screw them up? Let me know in the comments below! Hey, that rhymes.