HAHAHA...Suckers. There's no boobies. You guys are more gullible than Logan when I told him I had beer in a fridge in my stomach. Although, it left a scar when he cut me open...for about 7 seconds. Stupid meathead.
Ok, ok, ok...let's get down to brass tax here (I've always wanted to say that). As a busy, on the go mercenary, I don't have time for a lot of movie nonsense. Just kidding. I get so damn bored at home watching Dr. Phil reruns (love that guy), that sometimes I even watch DC films! Shhhh...don't tell anyone. I love movie fights, especially ones in Comic Book Movies. Sometimes I wish I had my own CBM fight...where I DON'T have swords for arms. Seriously, where did they go when they retraced?
Anyways...I thought you guys might like to know what Deadpool thinks are the coolest CBM fights ever. I'm not talking big CGI-fest superfights either (sorry Superman), but good old fashioned beatdowns. Let's look shall we?
Keep in mind, these are in no particular order. I wanted to rank them, but the math made my personalities argue.
First up, from Fox's X2: X-Men United, we have a spirited battle between Wolverine (hey, he's Canadian too!) and Lady Deathstrike, shut up, I know they never called her that.
That was pretty badass. Well, Her ass ain't bad anyways. Those claws of hers are AWESOME!
Moving along...
Next up, we have my good buddy Logan going at it again. This time it's his girlfriend's father! Seriously, does this guy just fight everyone? Let's have a look at this phenomenal fight scene from Fox's The Wolverine. (Jeez, kind of a self-serving tile...don't ya think Logan? That'd be like me naming a video game Deadpool). It's of awful quality, because youtube sucks more than She-Hulk on her day off.
Pure awesomeness. When Wolvie yelled, "I'm the Wolverine", I almost died from laughter. Nice dialogue, hoser.
Next up, we have my personal favourite. The throwndown to end all throwdowns. The king, the champion, the humdinger, the beatdown of beatdowns, a real barnburner...sick of me yet?
Ok, here it is. We have Blade vs. Nomak, from Guillermo Del Toro's brilliant Blade II.
Simply incredible.
Moving swiftly along, I bring you the only MCU offering on my list. Here we see Captain America (or is it Johnny Storm? Or is it Jensen (bonus points to whoever gets that reference)) taking on his best buddy Bucky, or as we like to call him (because Bucky is a crappy name), the Winter Soldier.
Awesome, isn't it. How the hell did Sebastian Stan learn how to flip knives like that? I must've cut my hand off 13 f**king times trying to do that.
Well folks, that's it for me! I'm gonna go have a chimichanga and fap to Elisha Cuthbert...
*Hey, asshole, we're not done yet. You promised the people 5 videos*
Oops...my bad.
Ummm...I can't think of anything. I've got Elisha on the brain (wish she was on my lap, then I wouldn't be writing this stupid article...I blame Phaneuf)
Well, here. How about a special treat. Let's watch me kick the crap out of that boring blowhard Deathstroke!
Ok, that's it, I'm done. It's well past fap o'clock, and I'm sick of talking to you guys.
Until next time! Have a wonderful day, assholes!