Ror Revisits: STAR WARS: EPISODE I THE PHANTOM MENACE...2D!

Ror Revisits: STAR WARS: EPISODE I THE PHANTOM MENACE...2D!

Ah yes, George Lucas's first Star Wars prequel. Felt like today was a good day to go back and take a look at this one for some reason. Can't put my finger on it..

Review Opinion
By MarkCassidy - Feb 10, 2012 10:02 AM EST
Filed Under: Star Wars

As we all know a 3D version of the movie hits theaters today. I won't be handing over any more of my cash to Mr Lucas to see a movie I already saw when I was a teenager in the cinema, and didn't like even then. You are welcome to, I'm not trying to sway anyone one way or the other. I'm sure if you have already made up your mind to go, this isn't exactly going to change it.



I'm sure many of you know I'm not a fan, but I didn't want to make this some kind of complete lambasting of a movie that has possibly been ridiculed more than any other in history - while having a legion of staunch defenders at the same time. I don't think it's a good, well made film. I also Genuinely believe it is the most disappointing movie ever made. But that doesn't mean that there are no redeeming features at all, so along with the criticisms I'm going to try to discover them.

Darth Maul Lightsaber fight.

Now on to the bad stuff. Ok I'm joking, there are other good things. Visually it's hard to fault. Although the shots are not very creative, on the surface it at least looks like a Star Wars movie. It's recognizable as the galaxy far far away we were treated to all those years ago, even if it has gone a bit CGI happy. Of course, it ISN'T, but it looks like it. I'm doing my best here ok! And as I mentioned that last Lightsaber dual is pretty cool and well choreographed, and Lucas does have the cajones to kill off his main character (Oops! Spoiler alert, guess you can skip seeing the movie now), unfortunately by that stage I'm not sure anyone but the very young (and even then that's debatable) will give a damn. This brings me to what I really think is the biggest problem with the movie - it just doesn't engage us. There are other films that fall down in many other areas but still manage to make us somewhat emotionally invested in the story, and rise above the sum of their parts. But see THEY try. They give a damn so you will, and it's abundantly clear that Lucas and his cronies do not. Nobody will ever be able to convince me that the story and dialog featured in The Phantom Menace was written with a view to make anybody give so much as a flying [frick] about anything going on in the movie. On the contrary, at times it's so bad that it seems to have almost been done purposely. But of course that's just silly, I mean why would Lucas intentionally try to antagonize Star Wars fans? ( Greedo shot first). To get into the performances, dialog, plot etc would mean we would be here forever, and it's almost too much like shooting fish in a barrel these days so I'll just say they suck.

There are those that think bashing the prequels is just some sort of "cool" thing fanboys do now for some reason. There are those that believe that if you don't like the prequels, then you don't like Star Wars. And of course there are those that honestly genuinely like them. And that's all fine, nobody is telling you not to, and if it makes you feel better to believe that the "haters" are only out to stir up controversy or follow the crowd etc, keep on believing it. All I can do is give my opinion, and that is Star Wars: The Phantom Menace is a pretty bad film. And yes, it would still have been a pretty bad film had the original trilogy never existed, it just wouldn't have been so damn disappointing.



Notice how I got through that without mentioning Jar Jar Binks once? Yeah I forgot about him, take a star off the rating.









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NerdyGeek
NerdyGeek - 2/10/2012, 10:39 AM
But... but that trailer looked sooo good! :P
MovieMaster
MovieMaster - 2/10/2012, 10:50 AM
I think Ror was too generous with this review. I commend him for not going on a rant about why Lucas should be burnt at the stake surrounded by Jar Jar Binks merchandise, like I would've done.



:)
Drewsterville
Drewsterville - 2/10/2012, 10:52 AM

GIFSoup

Worst movie ever
Mrcool210
Mrcool210 - 2/10/2012, 10:55 AM
according to someone i know, it made money there fore its good -_-
TrollHunter
TrollHunter - 2/10/2012, 10:55 AM
Yawn... Some one else taking easy pot shots at movie that is no where near as bad as everyone says. Why is site so [frick]ing cynical. Come on CBM, lets get some articles with some different views and just stop beating a dead horse.

As for my personal views on the movie? I think will suffice - http://movies.ign.com/articles/121/1218394p1.html
JDUKE25
JDUKE25 - 2/10/2012, 10:57 AM
I enjoyed this movie.

Seeing Obi-Wan as a young apprentice, Qui-Gon, hot Queen, Pod-racing, lightsaber fights, space battles.

flaws for me:
-Jar Jar
-Not enough Darth Maul
-the fight between the Gungans and droids was kind of lame

3.5/5
PaulRom
PaulRom - 2/10/2012, 11:00 AM
Agreed with JDUKE25 (almost) completely. Also, I'd like to add that the script/dialogue was deeply, deeply flawed. I was always generous with it since it was the first Star Wars film I saw, and coincidentally got me into the franchise.
I haven't seen it in years though, so I'd probably hate it by now (mostly enjoyed it as a kid/preteen).
ecksmanfan
ecksmanfan - 2/10/2012, 11:05 AM
Worst movie ever? Probably not. The movie has some decent scenes, and as far as I'm concerned, has one of the best fight scenes to come along in some time. However, there are some things that blew...like Jar-Jar, the kid that played Anakin and the lack of more Darth Maul.
MarkCassidy
MarkCassidy - 2/10/2012, 11:10 AM
Exactly, one fight scene and then lots of other scenes of Jedi cutting through useless Droids like butter. Not exactly gripping.
Wildaniel
Wildaniel - 2/10/2012, 11:11 AM


JDUKE25
JDUKE25 - 2/10/2012, 11:13 AM
the first fight (it was short) with Qui-Gon and Darth Maul on Tattooine, then the big fight at the end. Then there was a bunch of just lightsaber action cutting up droids and s#it.
MarkCassidy
MarkCassidy - 2/10/2012, 11:18 AM
I don't think it's the WORST movie ever made by a mile, I said most disappointing. There are plenty worse obviously, but they didn't come with such enormous expectations which were not met..not by a long shot.
headlopper
headlopper - 2/10/2012, 11:19 AM
"...at times it's so bad that it seems to have almost been done purposely."
H-haaa! The money quote! You gotta wonder , ay Ror.
ecksmanfan
ecksmanfan - 2/10/2012, 11:23 AM
It's bad enough that I won't be forking over money to see it again. I'd rather just watch it on DVD and fast-forward to the end.
headlopper
headlopper - 2/10/2012, 11:24 AM
I think @teabag said it best in a thread post on a editorial I wrote a few weeks ago about this subject...and I quote:
"It's really very simple- the prequel's are heartless".
Vadakin
Vadakin - 2/10/2012, 11:24 AM
Yawn.
TheGreenRanger
TheGreenRanger - 2/10/2012, 11:32 AM
Death of Superman = Death of Star Wars
headlopper
headlopper - 2/10/2012, 11:40 AM
I 'll admit that the costume design was cool.

What was most repulsive to me as Christian was the 'virgin birth' of Anakin.
So we're suppose to assume that the midichlorian knocked up Shmi, suggesting the bible story of Mary being made pregnant by the Holy Spirit.

This was just absolutely unnecessary. If Lucas wanted Anakin's dad out of the screenplay, just say he died in a shuttle accident or something.
It's freaking sacrilegious!

Also , Jar-jar was supposed to be semi-aquatic, yet has NO physical traits to support that. No webbed feet or hands. No fins or sleek body design.

Just these big, clunky shod feet.
Oh man, I gotta stop...
GLprime2814
GLprime2814 - 2/10/2012, 11:48 AM
It sucks cuz this re release is still going to make a butt load of cash. : (
JohnnyKrypton
JohnnyKrypton - 2/10/2012, 11:54 AM
Right on the nose, Ror. Nicely done.
headlopper
headlopper - 2/10/2012, 11:57 AM
@monkeyballs3 - Wow. That's pretty good analysis. I tend to agree.

I'll add one thing: Uncle George may be jealous of his own creation. Let's face it, 'Star Wars' is prodigiously greater than himself. And he may just resent that.
Superheromoviefan
Superheromoviefan - 2/10/2012, 12:01 PM
Good things: The race, Lightsaber fight
The rest meh
Jar Jar worst thing EVER!!!
Great review
headlopper
headlopper - 2/10/2012, 12:22 PM
I think this generation ( I'm a Gen-X'er myself) needs to hang their hope on Jackson, Nolan, Del Toro, Abrams and other stand-outs to give us great films now-a-days.

The future of film IMO is definitely in CBM's. That's where the big money is. THAT'S why Disney bought Marvel- they saw the 'writing on the wall' , so to speak.
BIGBMH
BIGBMH - 2/10/2012, 12:27 PM
You Star Wars fanboys don't know true disappointment. Try being a fan of Indiana Jones, Dragon Ball, and Avatar The Last Airbender. 2008-2010 were some of the most disappointing film experiences ever.
MarkCassidy
MarkCassidy - 2/10/2012, 12:28 PM
For what it's worth I think they got slightly better as they went along. ROTS might be called a HALF decent movie..maybe..if I was in a great mood..having just got laid..and was drunk.
MercMatt
MercMatt - 2/10/2012, 12:34 PM
Fully agree, Ror. But I got to admit... I was looking for an entertaining rant, also. This movie is Star Wars in name only. It may have some of the original characters, but like the Resident Evil movies, the new Star Wars trilogy has not the feeling of it's original creation. Disappointments all around.
headlopper
headlopper - 2/10/2012, 12:45 PM
@MercMatt- Very well said. Been saying as much myself.

The '3-quels' are basically three very cool sci-fi movies which UNFORTUNATELY have the name 'Star Wars' attached to them.

That's where the travesty begins.
Stumblin
Stumblin - 2/10/2012, 12:46 PM
And that's why, you always leave a note.
MarkCassidy
MarkCassidy - 2/10/2012, 1:01 PM
No probs! Incidentally my sarcastic "" around the word haters means you can substitute it for "People who know good movies from bad ones":)
Greengo
Greengo - 2/10/2012, 1:03 PM
When you where a teenager? What? 19? lmao
Greengo
Greengo - 2/10/2012, 1:13 PM
You summed it up saying "it would still have been a pretty bad film had the original trilogy never existed, it just wouldn't have been so damn disappointing."

I see it exactly opposite... It would have been even more disappointing if it wasn't associated to Star Wars at all. Being "Star Wars" is the only thing that make it worth seeing, full stop/period
Ceejay
Ceejay - 2/10/2012, 1:27 PM
The future of film is definately NOT in CBM, there's only a handful of comic superhero characters that are marketable to any decent profit. The rest are simply characters no average joe gives a flying Frak about except fanboys. Green Lantern being a prime example!

The general Public will soon have the fill of Superheroes with the overkill due this year. The only comic characters that really matter to them are Batman, Superman and Spiderman. Everything else is just a hit and hope the movie or the main actors performance can win them over like Iron Man for instance.

In the entire top ten of all time domestic only one comic book film is prominent and that's The Dark Knight. IN the top 20 you can add two Spider-man films and that's it! Most Comic book film struggle to make anything overseas and they don't compare to what general scifi and fantasy movies make in the charts. In the top 20 all time world wide film chart only The Dark Knight makes the list, the next comic book movie is SPider-man 3 at 22nd place and Spider-man at 30th!!

There's money in some of these comic characters but not many, not by a long shot. The future of movies lies in better concepts and way better written material than you find in the average comic book.
marvel72
marvel72 - 2/10/2012, 1:28 PM
star wars the phantom menace episode 1

good

-qui gon jin
-darth maul
-triple threat light sabre duel

bad

-everything else
Greengo
Greengo - 2/10/2012, 1:37 PM
@ceejay: who gives a [frick] if they're not top 20 most profitable???

Plenty of genre/indy films are made all the time and don't pull big profit.

Some of the best films ever made haven't necessarily done well in the box office.

We'll never be rid of CBM's. There's just too much material available that can be re imagined an infinite numbers of times.


CBM'S ARE HERE TO STAY HOMBRE!!!!!!!!
headlopper
headlopper - 2/10/2012, 1:45 PM
@Greengo - RIGHT?!!
Greengo
Greengo - 2/10/2012, 1:54 PM
fo shizzle
SGA
SGA - 2/10/2012, 2:52 PM
I'm a huge Star Wars fan, and while disappointed in this movie, I'm not going to lie, I'm going to see it tomorrow lol

But I'm tired of everyone saying "It was the worst movie. Biggest embarrassment, blah, blah, blah."

There's this character I love more than Star Wars, and quite possibly DID have the worst movie ever. I'm talking Batman & Robin.

Give credit where it's due ;)
BetaRay28
BetaRay28 - 2/10/2012, 3:46 PM
I was one of those 2 people and yes that's how many people went to see it at the theater close to me and i was like it was ok but worth seeing since it will be the last time it's on the big screen, until 4D with more Jar-Jar heaven help us all.If you are parent now and where not in 99 take your kids to see it and show them where the story got started but tell them there is better movies to come.
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